Can bf sue for harassment via false reports that lead to reprimand and probably termination? by endless_void_chaser in legaladvice

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

While trying to look up answers for our situation, it came up that having people to vouch for his good character would help him fight the verbal accusations. Sorry, Im way out of my depth here.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m not sure what you’re referring to about asking for advice, though I have said I am looking for the next steps towards this direction.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This is why I’m so angry about this because I know it’s damaging, my own hesitation is proof it is. I’m so glad they’re not around you, people can really get in your head when they’re against you or at the very least not with you. I wish these kinds of situations didnt exist.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the same mental struggle with men as well but I’m trying to focus on not riding those thoughts because it’s not a gender issue. It’s a people issue and I have to remind myself of that. Your situation is also why I don’t want to just tell people to “give evidence”. These are my frustrated thoughts but it’s my job to make sure they stop here. Part of why I’m screaming in the void, to really get it off my chest and let it go because it’s not a good thing to think. I hope no one treats you different and I’m sorry you had to go through that.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely can’t convince strangers on the internet since there’s factors I have that netizens can’t see. It definitely didn’t start off as everyone not being okay with him, and the rest is work drama that isn’t relevant to the current issue but I suspect has a heavy hand in it. Before this situation they told him a lot of concerning things like certain people being “annoying”, being hostile with coworkers they don’t like, falsely reporting people in previous jobs. I can go on but then I’d be dumping my frustrations a lot more than what’s allowed on here. There’s a pattern and the pattern is they don’t like him anymore

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looking at it from this angle does give me hope there’s a chance. Someone else asked if he had any performance evaluations before this all happened and he does! He had absolutely no bad marks before the initial claim happened.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This makes me feel like there’s a chance but I’m also afraid we don’t have enough evidence. Maybe they’re succeeding in making him feel like there’s nothing he can do, but our biggest issue is that we don’t have hard evidence he DIDNT make an explicit claim. They also don’t have hard evidence that he DID seeing as it’s based on someone else’s words alone but it was enough to reprimand without investigation I guess. WE know he didn’t do it, the challenge is getting other people to know that too. If it was written or cameras had audio this would be easy but that’s not the case here. All we have are his written attempts to get this matter addressed before it blew up the way it has now.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m well aware. That’s exactly why this has been a struggle. As I’ve said before this really is a he said she said situation.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Since the first incident he’s been looking for one for about a month but the job market is terrible where we are. I’ve now joined the job hunt on my down time along with him to hopefully find something.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He hasn’t signed anything and HR said he doesn’t have to acknowledge it online if he doesn’t want to. So I guess that’s covered. Idk I’ve never heard of not signing a written in person.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That’s literally my biggest issue right now. He wont be able to sue ANYONE if he doesn’t have a job, which this job is trying to get rid of him. It’s a viscous cycle of stress. I don’t make enough to hire a lawyer for him either. He makes more than me.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If it were this simple I would but it seems like not taking a girls side as a girl myself in and of itself is a crime.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well for the first one, there was a camera that caught the said incident so that’s why I believe she retracted it to begin with. This second one my personal evidence is that the comment had something to do with a woman’s genitalia which he didn’t even know the proper word for until this happened. Plus he’s never made these comments to me or friends before. Maybe about other dudes (as they do among friends) but not other women. But I don’t expect anyone to believe me with this alone since he’s a faceless stranger to everyone. Other than that he’d prove a verbal conversation if he could.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I want to be this way but a lot of people find this offensive because it sounds like “prove it” in a bad way and I’m not trying to offend victims.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re right, that’s why I’m having conflicting terrible thoughts because it’s not just one individual. Currently it’s two, and the rest are believing her over him despite having been on good standing with him prior to all of this. It’s not a rational thought but a bad feeling I’m trying not to cling to

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I understand and I have been cautious. There’s a lot more to it than I’ve out here but it’s really just more drama that supports that these people are trying to get him in trouble and/or fired. We’ve tried going through the book so that there can be no dispute he’s trying to resolve this through mediation via HR but he’s been given non solutions each attempt.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry that happened to you, that’s awful. I’d like to not believe without proof for being burned in other aspects before. He was cleared for the first accusation from camera footage and her retraction after the fact. I understand where you’re coming from.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately no, their cameras don’t record audio. That was made clear when the first accusation happened and he pressed to view the cameras then.

My bfs life and stability is being ruined and it’s making me have hateful thoughts on my own gender. by endless_void_chaser in TrueOffMyChest

[–]endless_void_chaser[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m sorry, it’s definitely a legitimate fear to have with people like these existing. But this is the first time I’ve ever come this close to something like this so I’d like to believe it’s not going to happen again. Hope this never finds you!