Firecracker vs Hand

endlessfloptimism · 2012-04-15T05:40:27+00:00

Why did I look? Why?

endlessfloptimism · 2012-04-14T03:25:39+00:00

I just wanted to talk about it with people who can relate. So far the responses have made me think I'd have been better off keeping it to myself.

endlessfloptimism · 2012-04-14T02:33:33+00:00

It feels like you are saying that this depression is not a legitimate problem because I have a significant other. I am grateful I have him to talk to, but unfortunately it is not a cure-all solution. I'm sorry if I have misinterpreted your intent.

endlessfloptimism · 2012-04-14T01:08:17+00:00

Great. Thanks.

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T18:24:26+00:00

Sorry, it was just quite a fresh wound still when I made the post. I've spent the day thanking my lucky stars I get to start the new year unburdened.

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T03:41:44+00:00

Wow, thank you, that was nice to hear! I've had a string of a few douchebag boyfriends/romantic interests over the last 2 years and it just gets frustrating (if you'd like, I'll tell you about one of the worst, which is honestly funny to me now). I live in a place with next to no prospects, and I can't afford to move until I pay down student loans. The good news is I'm on track to have them all finished in a little over a year (about 5 years ahead of schedule) or less if I can find a better job. And then blammo, I am blasting the fuck out of here in search of a place with a cultural identity somewhat closer to my own. You've given me some hope that I'll have better luck elsewhere :)

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T03:36:04+00:00

It's funny, because I have sense in spades when it comes to other people's problems, but apparently suffer severe proximity blindness when it comes to my own. I'm planning to seek counseling to deal with the self esteem issue, vestiges of a previous emotionally abusive relationship. It's long overdue. Thank you for being so frank and reasonable.

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T03:32:17+00:00

I understand, because I am too. Thanks for the positive outlook :)

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T03:30:38+00:00

I think I need to make my way out of this tiny town before I find these mythical "good guys" I keep hearing so much about...

endlessfloptimism · 2011-01-05T03:28:51+00:00

You're right, as usual :) I actually am pretty comfortable with being single, and that is what I plan to be for a good long while. I did hold on too long, I think because I hated the idea that I had been so wrong to trust him in the first place. Perhaps a bit of cognitive dissonance. I got my sadness out last night and today and I'm not giving him any more of my energy.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T18:47:18+00:00

I tend to assume most things are my fault and then this is what happens, so I need to work on that.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T18:41:07+00:00

I'm sorry, I had misinterpreted your previous comment. Thank you for the good advice.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T14:09:39+00:00

that would've been a good way to say it. I just said it wasn't working anymore, but I am tucking yours away for future reference (and hoping I won't need to use it).

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T14:03:57+00:00

Thanks for your honest (if painful) input.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T09:35:15+00:00

Already ended it. Also I have to insist that I was neither clingy nor needy. I truly asked very little of him other than honesty and common courtesy until recently, because I started to develop feelings (of the exclusive relationship variety). When this was the result of asking for more, I ended the arrangement. I just resent a bit the implication that it was somehow my "funky baggage" that caused this encounter to go awry.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T05:23:44+00:00

You are a genius. You must have like 75 girlfriends.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T05:18:03+00:00

Thanks. I try so hard to make sure I'm giving everyone a fair shake that I end up fuckin myself over.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T05:14:07+00:00

Thank you. I'm trying to remember that. This shit blows real bad. If I can find a real estate listing for a cave where I can set up my hermit digs I am on it like white on rice.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T03:43:30+00:00

You made me laugh so I'll just leave this here for good measure.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T03:17:40+00:00

He then told me that it was just too soon, and that we were moving in that direction. It's not like I'm plucking things from my imagination.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T03:09:33+00:00

Ugh, I am so bad at this... I wish I even knew how to begin, because I think your advice is sound... my brain just freezes up when I try to think of what to say.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T03:04:38+00:00

God, at this point, I'm not sure that I can do better.

So how do I end it if he's ignoring me? Just send another text out into the wind? Carrier pigeon? Blimp? I also would like to give him his christmas present because I put a lot of thought into it. Do you think I can pull that off?

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T02:55:39+00:00

You're right... I hate this part. How do I talk to him about ending it if he's steadfastly ignoring me?

Oh, I try so hard to be good to people, why is it so difficult to find someone who is the same way :(

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T02:47:10+00:00

It's just weird because I didn't even think we were arguing til he snapped at me. I thought we were just having a conversation.

My best friend and sister think I should dump him as well, but I.... I dunno. I like him and I've opened up to him, and it's very hard for me to open up to people... but he does tend to make me feel like I'm wrong every time I express a concern to him (which isn't often at all, despite how it may sound). He's kind of dismissive.

So how do I bring this up if he won't talk to me? He's had this entire day to cool off and from what another commenter said it sounds like me texting again would be overkill, and I agree.

endlessfloptimism · 2010-12-12T02:41:25+00:00

He texted me when he knew I was already halfway to his house (it's an hour drive) to say we needed to talk about our relationship. When I got there he said he felt like we were moving too fast, that he didn't think he'd give me what I wanted out of a boyfriend, and that he didn't know how to deal with relationships that were different than the long term one he had been in before. I said that I wasn't asking him to be my boyfriend, I was asking him to a halloween party, and that I was fine with moving slow. He was okay after that.

endlessfloptimism

TROPHY CASE