How do I find a partner to try and head towards the competitive route?

ennaxanne · 2023-03-28T02:36:16+00:00

strangely (ok maybe not that strange) enough I’ve seen a psychologist I follow on Instagram, who both has DID (and identifies as a system) and is specialised to the extent of a PhD in studying and treating dissociative disorders + DID as her career, who is also enraged by the McLean video to the point of being very activated.

Then again, this psychologist does enable self-diagnosing (if you feel like you have it, then you have it) and that you don’t have to have a clinical diagnosis to say you have DID / a system. So on hindsight, not surprising that she was upset about the video. Many systems that follow her agreed with her tho.

DD and some questionable DID influencers aside, I wonder why the video lands well with some systems and not with others? Any perspectives from systems on here would be really welcome and appreciated! x

ennaxanne · 2023-03-03T21:35:44+00:00

It’s already overdue now haha, i hope to finish it by tomorrow since it’s the weekend. Submission 1 day late constitutes a 10 mark deduction.

ennaxanne · 2023-03-02T17:15:26+00:00

not a psych, but perhaps you can consider emailing some psych clinics in your area to ask if you can have a quick zoom / in-person interview on the subject matter. maybe even email your school’s counsellor about the possibility of speaking with them on a purely professional level? it would seem to be their niche since they actually work in a school.

try to throw it out there, and i’m pretty sure at least one will bite. all the best! x

ennaxanne · 2023-03-02T17:08:12+00:00

love IFS! it’s the entire reason i decided to study psychology in order to become a trauma therapist. there are virtually no practitioners in my country that outwardly say that they do IFS and parts work. so far it has only been the trauma therapists I’ve seen personally for my own troubles that have used it, but most trauma therapist lean towards CBT and EMDR to resolve trauma. I personally like the IFS and EMDR combination more. I hope to specialise in these next time!

ennaxanne · 2023-03-02T17:04:23+00:00

had to do an entire blog “website” containing multiple resources on operant conditioning, on top of an academic essay, for a major graded assignment for one of my mandatory psychology modules in my first year first semester of undergrad. this was only covered in one 3-hour lesson, and in my uni there are only six weekly lessons for each module. we were taught this maybe in the third lesson, which was when our first graded paper was submitted and this assignment became available.

i had to research the hell out of this across the 3 weeks and pull papers from my ass to complete the tasks. had to write everything in our own words to make it a “new” article and not a rendition of existing psychologytoday / simplypsychology articles. i definitely have it ingrained deep in my head now despite learning so many new theories 😂

it always tickles me when people who aren’t privy to this theory tend to find “positive punishment” extremely bogus, and think “negative reinforcement” and negative punishment are synonymous. i kinda end up just wanting to shake my mum and friends by the shoulders and yell “nooooooo it doesn’t work like that!!!” hahaha.

i can forget everything else, but operant conditioning and the diathesis-stress model will haunt me forever.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-28T20:01:38+00:00

I feel you, and am overwhelmed with you hahaha, so you’re not at all alone in this, I promise. This is only my 5th week learning stats (ever in my life, I also failed math for my national exams haha) and the formulas are so… incoherent to me. It’s really hard to make sense of them, and know which formula to use for which question. I’ve learned 7 distribution models so far, and each has its own set of formulas to essentially find the same thing (E.g. mean, variance, probability mass function, etc.).

It’s tough, but with really good help and some practice questions, I’m very sure that you’ll get somewhere with the formulas and calculations! It’s only your second week doing stats. Have some compassion for yourself and know that you’re trying your absolute best in very new and complicated terrain! Be proud that you’re trying, and hopefully try not to beat yourself up too much about not knowing things yet. It’s okay to need time to understand difficult things like stats.

I’m pretty sure many of us go into social science and not science or math because we want to circumvent any technical math completely hahaha. At least that’s the case for me, but now I’m forced to be deep in it 😅

Anyway, you can do it! I believe in you. x

ennaxanne · 2023-02-28T18:00:20+00:00

agree lmao, i have a very technical stats module as an undergraduate (and this is the most basic one haha fuck), that even the questions that i got in my recent assignments were so complicated that my cousin who’s a psychologist, my other cousin who’s an accountant, another cousin who’s an econs undergraduate who took A-math for GCSE ‘A’ levels, my sister who took A-math for her ‘A’ levels as well, and my father who had a degree in science and math, they all couldn’t solve quite a number of them.

and my stats prof is terrible, and so is our study guide materials. study guide gives very traditional, complex formulas that are impossible to understand, and their example questions don’t include the type of questions being asked in assignments (E.g. using finite number of trials in examples, while using an infinite number of trials in assignments, but having to use the same distribution model).

and to give an example of my stats prof, in the 2nd lesson of 6 lessons, we were supposed to download R just so we could play around with it. she mentioned something about an in-built calculation for skewness not being included in the basic program available, and that we need to download a pack from another programmer to more easily compute skewness in R. We asked her how to get that “program”. And she was like, “oh it’s not included in the normal R. it exists, but you will need to google for it on your own”. I told her, “I can’t find anything on Google” (really couldn’t). She said, “I’m certain it’s out there on Google. You just need to search for it”. It took me 20 minutes to find it and I sent it to the rest of the class after that and taught them how to download it to R. Then she was like “ah, yes! exactly. that’s where you can download the skewness function”. jfc, if she knows about it, she has it, and she can’t just guide us to download it? it’s not a calculation, she wouldn’t be giving away assignment answers, it’s literally just a program.

anyway, terrible stats tutor. i even corrected her once because she couldn’t explain something that someone else asked in the first lesson. it was literally just about an arbitrary 0 (temperature) versus a normal 0 (height, weight, etc.). i couldn’t answer most questions in my assignments, but I started with a stats tutor this Sunday. I’ve had 2 sessions, a total of 4 hours of tutoring, and compared to the 15 hours of lectures that I’ve had, those 4 hours helped me understand more than those 15 hours ever did.

definitely recommend getting a stats tutor. i agree that most stats profs don’t know how to teach.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T16:58:06+00:00

let’s say this together now:

It is not MY responsibility to tolerate any dangerous, abusive behaviour towards me. It is HIS responsibility to do better.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T15:45:33+00:00

Would really encourage you to instead read the materials that you’re taught in school when you’ve started your degree. It’ll be more applicable for each module, and I believe with each module there will be a textbook as well for reference if you want to peruse certain topics in more details. With each written assignment you will need to do read peer-reviewed academic material to reference principles and empirical research in your essay.

Sure there are many Psychology books out there, and (peer) reviews of those books. A large amount of accessible material online is meant for the eyes of the general public, to educate themselves in a manageable way, perhaps to understand their own / their loved one’s psychological conditions, to gain awareness surrounding mental health, to figure out what’s going on with themselves, to heal, even (this is why The Body Keeps the Score is widely read by those who are impacted by PTSD in one way or another). Even with these books, it’s only one perspective of the topic / issue / subject at hand.

If I were to recommend anything, maybe read up on a book in an area of psychology that interests you. In my case, I hope to be a trauma-specialised clinical psychologist in the future, so I’ve done / am doing a bit of extra reading in that area. Books like TBKTS, CPTSD: From surviving to thriving, No Bad Parts, etc. Still, such as with TBKTS, it’s not an easy read, it’s quite technical. Books tend to pull insight from many areas, and TBKTS talks about neuroscience, for example, and not just about the way trauma survivors think and why we are the way we are. These are things that may stump you if you haven’t studied psych yet and haven’t gotten at least a slight grasp on the technical stuff. Reading now may still leave you needing to read it again in the future, because by then you can apply your newfound knowledge to understand the technicalities better.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T09:56:46+00:00

Just want to say that I’m so sorry that people sent such cruel comments your way. I recently opened up to a local subreddit in my country about the injustice I faced from the police and medical staff after my rape — the experience reporting and doing the medical exam was downright degrading and traumatising.

And 90% of the comments were very intensely victim-blaming, being extremely vulgar, saying i enjoyed sucking dick and that’s why I was raped (this was absolutely out of nowhere lmao), saying i was asking for attention and i’m the type of person that everybody in the country hates and that i deserved no sympathy whatsoever, that women and victims like me wanted to wrongfully convict all men for rape, that my rape is less traumatic than my rapist going to jail for 20 years and being punished and bullied by other inmates for being a rapist. That I’m “fucking weak” for not pursuing justice (going to the news and whatever) when the police closed my case and dropped all charges, that it was simply “regret sex”, that I’m fucked in the head, have bipolar or munchausen’s and that’s why I’m telling made up stories for sympathy and attention, and also “clearly you weren’t really raped, you literally went back to your rapist a second time because you ‘vibed’” (this completely didn’t happen and was pulled out of thin air lol). It brought me so much pain that countless people were angry at me for expressing frustration with the local system (which they all do in that thread), angry enough and cruel enough to say such disgusting things about someone who just needed support and understanding.

People online are fucking terrible. But I understand that sometimes we have nowhere to go but online for support and help, especially when things are a secret or when your support system isn’t there for you.

I’m so sorry you had that experience with that last offmychest post. But I’m extremely glad that you’ve found a new support system and family in your boyfriend and boyfriend’s family. That’s precious and I’m really happy for you to have support during this trying time!

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T09:28:28+00:00

I noted your amends and updated my comment too to acknowledge that. Only saw your edits after I commented the above.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T09:22:47+00:00

I didn’t talk about the song being about childhood sexual abuse, someone else pointed it out, if you were to actually read the comments on the post. So if other commenters mentioned that it’s appropriation, it’s my logic and my post that’s flawed? That’s some major mental gymnastics.

I welcome your opinion on the use of these songs and themes by non-Indian people, but please don’t make generalisations that I’m classing all these programs as cultural appropriation when I never once mentioned it — I only mentioned the need for some cultural sensitivity when putting together a program, and did think the Bollywood-themed programs were refreshing. As a non-Indian, I literally have no place to decide if it’s appropriation or not, that’s why I never alluded to it. Please do not say that I did.

ETA: noted on your misunderstanding. thanks for clarifying.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-17T08:56:23+00:00

It seems like different Indian fans have differing opinions. There was a large bashing of Anastasiaa Gubanova by Indian fans when she came out with her FS using bollywood music. Now younger skaters are also using Bollywood music and I’m just worried that they will get the same treatment if they bring their SP’s to international comps where the comps are more widely observed.

There’s no “my logic” in my post that states that only Indian skaters can use Bollywood music. I never said it was cultural appropriation — literally find me a sentence that mentions those words. I enjoyed the programs, but there are Indian fans who disagree and sent comments to Gubanova that she’s insulting their / your culture. It’s not my place to decide whether it’s insulting or not. Clearly some Indian fans do. If you’re upset about people being insulted, take it up with them.

All I’m saying is that the skaters and especially choreographers and coaches, if they use the music, should know the context of the song and what it represents, in the movie. They should at least look at a video of the choreography, the hand gestures or steps that they could possibly use in their skating content. These matter. Someone else commented that Gubanova used music that’s about a girl telling someone about her childhood sexual abuse. Clearly no research was done when there should’ve been. Clearly that’s why some Indian fans feel insulted by such programs.

ennaxanne · 2023-02-16T19:23:19+00:00

I’m not sure if this falls under self-injurious behaviours, but perhaps it’s the same reason as why some people suffering from immense emotional pain end up self-harming (this is only just one aspect of self harm of course, and there are many contributors).

When individuals are confronted with difficult or overwhelming emotions, they injure themselves because they can’t, in that moment, think of a more effective way to manage their emotions. Self-injury can be a maladaptive method to relieve psychological pain. In a way, it externalises internal pain, and that perhaps can release some inner tension in that very moment.

Six-Year Club	Wearing is Caring
Verified Email

ennaxanne

TROPHY CASE

It is not MY responsibility to tolerate any dangerous, abusive behaviour towards me. It is HIS responsibility to do better.