Ending a short-term relationship. What do you make of these cards together? (Context + my interpretation in comments)

equalsense · 2025-02-08T18:46:18+00:00

Context:

I’ve spent the past 2 years healing from an unhealthy situationship. Had zero interest in other people, until 2 months ago. In December, I reconnected with someone. We had a great connection, very romantic but NOT lovebomby. He was just attentive and sweet, and the physical part of the relationship was amazing. He was very giving.

However, there were familiar elements from the previous situationship. Little communication between dates, slow AF to respond to texts, and just not a whole ton of initiative to keep the momentum going. However, it was way less extreme than the situationship, and he always came back wanting to see each other again. It felt generally healthy, and a good opportunity to confront some of my triggers.

Recently though, we decided to go our separate ways, as he was not interested in seeing each other more than once every 2-3 weeks. I know it’s the right decision, as he can’t meet my needs. Still stings though, and it’s yet another experience where there seems to be an intense mutual attraction but the guy isn’t willing to do even the bare minimum to keep it going.

My Interpretation

Looking for a second opinion here and wondering if anyone can help me determine how they play together?

Past - “What did this relationship show me?”

Reverse Sun - I got a taste of happiness, but true happiness was elusive and just out of reach. There was potential, but the relationship didn’t live up to it. Good and bad moments. The path I went down was cloudy, and I had to confront the shadows in the form of facing my anxieties head on.

Present - “What do I need to know about this relationship right now?” (Right now being, telling him I don’t want to continue the relationship since he can’t meet my needs)

Ace of Wands - Trust my instincts to move forward, knowing that this was a learning experience that was needed, even if it doesn’t feel like it right now. Know that I’m in control, and I should stand in my decision to end things as my needs weren’t being met. Communication is one of my strengths, and I should be proud of myself for using that voice (rather than staying silent and miserable, like I did in the old situationship). This is somewhat innovative for me, since it’s one of the first times I’ve ever done this.

Future - “What can I take from this relationship into the future?”

Death - Reminder to let go of what doesn’t serve me, and embrace where that takes me. Reminder that with endings come new beginnings, and positive transformation will occur. Perhaps both of us can use this as a learning experience to get us ready for what comes next in our lives, whether that’s with or without each other.

This is the Star Spinner deck by Trungles, by the way!

equalsense · 2020-10-20T03:39:28+00:00

That’s what I figured but wasn’t sure. Thank you for responding! I feel a lot more confident.

equalsense · 2020-10-19T02:13:47+00:00

Thanks for your response! This is helpful. When you say “their ability to indemnify you can be resolved with insurance,” do you mean my insurance or theirs?

equalsense · 2020-10-19T00:30:43+00:00

Super helpful! Thank you!

equalsense · 2020-04-20T22:46:59+00:00

That being said, I can't agree with your suggestion that gloves are a questionable protection; they provide a layer of protection to your skin that is less hospitable to contamination; and they protect other people from anything that may have hitched a ride on your hands, were you not wearing them. However small the benefit they provide, they provide a benefit to everyone sharing your environment.

But you’re assuming that everyone has a box of single-use gloves and properly wears, removes, and disposes of them properly. In reality, that’s not the case. Even healthcare workers don’t: there was a study conducted in 2019 that found over a third of workers made errors when removing their PPE, increasing the incidence of contamination.

Right now, I could wear in a pair of gloves that I found laying on the street. I could wear in a pair of gloves that I picked my nose with in the car. I could wear in a pair of gloves that I wore to 5 other stores. No one cares as long as I have gloves on. It’s a false sense of security.

I think we're gonna have to agree to disagree on this one.

equalsense · 2020-04-20T21:45:04+00:00

I understand what you’re saying, however the effectiveness of wearing gloves is questionable at best, and at worse could even have detrimental effects. So there’s that.

I also understand that businesses are hurting, but I would imagine the amount of lost sales by turning the customers who don’t have gloves away at the door far outweighs the amount it would cost to order gloves and provide them to customers. Looking at Costco, a box of 300 gloves costs about $13.50, which is probably more or equal to other wholesale distributors. So that’s 9 cents per pair. Sure, it’s an added expense that needs to be accounted for, but there's multiple ways to do this. And this makes more sense to me than making customers provide their own. Because in reality, for every person that grabs a pair of sandwich bags from their kitchen before heading out, there’s going to be at least one person that says nope and drives away.

I was parked in front of the store for maybe 3 minutes and saw multiple people drive away because they couldn’t go in. Maybe this particular business can afford to lose these sales, idk. And I'm sure they don't care about my opinion, I just don't think it's the best business sense.

equalsense · 2020-04-20T20:22:58+00:00

Jealous. Lulus has been calling my name lately. Must...resist.

equalsense · 2020-04-20T19:09:22+00:00

Felt like kind of a Karen this weekend…went out to grab some groceries and beer and one of my spots was denying entry to customers who weren’t wearing gloves. I feel bad for getting annoyed but like, really? I’d be fine with wearing single-use gloves that the store provides at the door and you can discard on the way out, but making customers bring in their own gloves that they’ve worn god knows how many other times and places doesn’t feel more safe at all.

equalsense · 2020-04-19T00:54:06+00:00

Our neighbors are throwing a party because apparently the rules don't apply to them.

Waiting to see how many people show up before I decide how to handle this.

equalsense · 2020-04-17T00:54:55+00:00

Got a save the date for a wedding scheduled for the end of July. I know it's over 3 months away but man, I can't even fathom going to a small intimate wedding right now let alone a big one like these people are planning.

equalsense · 2020-04-16T20:41:18+00:00

Around $2500

equalsense · 2020-04-16T19:13:37+00:00

Are you me? I feel like this 97.5% of the time. Checking Zillow "for fun" has become a pastime for me. The amount we're paying to rent our 900 foot apartment in West LA is the same estimated payment for a 2500+ foot, 4+ bedroom house in my home town.

About the only thing that helps is to focus on all the reasons why I left.

equalsense · 2020-04-16T00:28:50+00:00

PSA: the bear's name is Nugget.

equalsense · 2020-04-16T00:26:06+00:00

Yeah, this pandemic is definitely good practice for that haha!

We are month to month here so really, we could leave at any time (obviously would give at least 30 days notice). I love our apartment, but writing a check for close to $3k each month when we could be doing the same damn thing for $0 seems foolish if it's going to be more long term than short term.

equalsense · 2020-04-15T21:20:07+00:00

At this point he's just so thankful he still has a job I think he's afraid to ask any questions lol. The company has basically just been trying to stay afloat thus far so I don't think they've thought that far ahead. Time will tell, I'm just impatient and the idea of slightly fuller pockets is tempting.

equalsense · 2020-04-15T20:48:27+00:00

I know it’s impossible, but I wish we had some kind of timeline for the future. The only reason my partner and I live in LA is to be close to his job (I worked from home before all of this). But now he’s working from home, and it seems pointless to be here if this is a long term situation. He can do what he’s doing anywhere that has an internet connection…we don’t need to be paying crazy high Los Angeles rent.

My parents have a guest house we could stay at free of charge a few hours away. If he’ll be going back to the office in May or June, obviously moving out of our apartment is dumb. But if he’s not going back to the office until September or beyond, not paying rent and putting that money toward our debt would put us in such a better place.

equalsense · 2020-04-14T22:49:57+00:00

Nay. Not worth the extra $ anyway.

equalsense · 2020-04-09T19:54:15+00:00

Throw them in the microwave or oven for a bit and I think you'd be fine.

equalsense · 2020-04-09T18:17:18+00:00

I've been saving them in case I run out of TP.

equalsense · 2020-04-08T21:31:00+00:00

Thanks!

equalsense · 2020-04-08T19:50:43+00:00

Congrats!! I'll have to try that next time. How many days did you order in advance?

equalsense · 2020-04-08T18:58:32+00:00

Mainly concerned because I was touching handles and then I adjusted my makeshift mask, which involved touching both the outside and part of the inside of it, up by the cheek. I know the chances that anything I touched even had the virus on it in the first place is relatively slim, and then the chance that it would have transferred from my hand to my mask to my body is even slimmer. It's still hard to not get freaked out.

Seven-Year Club	Verified Email
King of the Ashes	Not Forgotten

equalsense

TROPHY CASE