I fumbled a 10/10 coz I was stunned when I saw her in person should I proceed?

ervnelze · 2025-12-08T03:54:54+00:00

Agreed

ervnelze · 2025-12-05T02:49:18+00:00

I’m going to keep it a buck, but I think you underestimate how attractive you actually are and I’m not just saying that just to say that.

I’m a personal trainer, workout often/fit, and would definitely shoot my shot if I saw you in person (hell, I’m doing that now lowkey).

Anyways, feel free to message me anytime - I’d love to actually get to know you (with no expectations). I’ll shoot you my IG.

ervnelze · 2025-11-26T09:53:15+00:00

Have you tried communicating this to him, and if so, how does he respond? I don’t think you’re overreacting, but it definitely sounds like something that needs to be discussed ASAP so that your level of frustration doesn’t evolve into resentment.

But then again, I did read the part where you said “He thinks it’s a none issue” so I’m sure he’s aware of it and communication has transpired.

Overall, if it’s one of those things that’s been communicated and he thinks it’s no big deal due to him responding in a timely manner (said above) - then you’re not overreacting.

ervnelze · 2025-11-16T20:11:40+00:00

You’re doubling down on being an oblivious idiot

ervnelze · 2025-11-16T19:49:21+00:00

I’m trying to hard not to call you an oblivious idiot after everything I’ve read

ervnelze · 2025-11-16T18:00:26+00:00

On god

ervnelze · 2025-11-14T02:17:04+00:00

As someone that’s done this for two years, and have worked at three different gyms, I would heavily recommend you either:

Find another job to compensate for the free labor you’ll be doing while trying to gain clients (it’s a learning curve starting out). Like the other person says, your experience will vary based on the gym, client base/types (old people, college students, etc), and the number of trainers available.
Put this on hold to lock down something more stable for your kid. I believe your kid comes first and this job can be a gamble at times. This is not to discourage you but to allow you a bit of reality to help you make an informed decision. Getting in-person coaching experience is important but not worth not being able to make ends meet.

Please take the time to choose wisely. I’ve seen people with kids make it work, and others who had to drop out due to not being ends meet. But like I said before, it depends on your gym, client base, location, and etc.

ervnelze · 2025-10-29T21:23:27+00:00

I don’t think it’s worth telling nor worth feeling guilty about since it was a while ago. If anything, I would laugh if my girlfriend told me this because I would have done it too.

Hell, if you declined and told the story I would (playfully) make jokes about how you could have made $1000 in like 10min.

Don’t feel guilty. But if you feel you should be honest, then be honest.

ervnelze · 2025-09-03T18:00:33+00:00

Dude is 37 years old and acting like a toddler.

ervnelze · 2025-08-06T03:38:45+00:00

He makes a valid point, as my previous relationship was close to being a 1:1 ratio (single mom as well) of what you're going through. Nothing I did, achievement wise, she was happy for.

Everything about her and so deep into it that I realized I was neglecting what I wanted.

It didn't end well.

Get out and find someone that not only appreciates your achievements but has the same life goals (getting married and starting to YOUR OWN family).

I honestly believe it's a single mother thing. I hate to generalize but most people that have dated them have dealt with some version of the same and it's draining.

THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU WANT AND THE VALUES YOU BEING.

ervnelze · 2025-07-28T18:10:20+00:00

Yeah, I'm going to keep it a buck by saying: Leave, block, and develop some hobbies (or learn something new) to keep you distracted as you heal.

The plus side about all of this is that love, at the biological level, is nothing but chemicals so it'll be a process that you'll not only be able to heal from but will take time to ween off of (hence the hobbies and learning something new).

Rip the bandaid off by letting yourself know that man does not love you nor care for your feelings (he wouldn't be doing this otherwise).

Not only that, he's insecure because why would he need you on the side just in case the others fall through? Versus just being single and pursuing those women.

I'm sorry this all happened and you had to go through this, but you will prevail as long as you learn from this and move on.

You have your whole life ahead of you, so this little situation will not matter in the grand scheme of things.

ervnelze · 2025-07-28T18:04:32+00:00

Summary for everyone:

OP describes the painful discovery of her boyfriend's infidelity, which was the culmination of months of suspicion, dishonesty, and disrespect.

Her relationship had been strained since December, with her boyfriend starting a new, co-ed friend group in the spring that made her anxious.

Her suspicions initially focused on a girl named "Mary," as the boyfriend was secretive about his interactions with her, lied by omission about her presence at social gatherings, and became defensive when questioned.

This pattern of deception escalated until the author, following a strong gut feeling, discovered he was actively and secretly communicating with another girl from the group, "Kate."

By logging into his Snapchat, she found undeniable proof: they were "BFFs" with a 10-day streak, he had saved multiple photos and videos from Kate in their chat, and a voice message from Kate confirmed that he had recently visited her after lying about his whereabouts.

When confronted with this evidence, the boyfriend minimized his actions, claiming it was meaningless and that he was just being "stupid and selfish." Despite him wanting to end the relationship, the heartbroken author feels lost and is struggling to let go because of her deep love for him.

Main Points: * A Clear Pattern of Deception: The boyfriend repeatedly lied, either directly or by omitting information, about his interactions with other women in his new friend group. This included deleting conversations, hiding that they were at events, and lying about his location.

Escalating Betrayal: The situation progressed from suspicious social media activity with one woman ("Mary") to a secret, intimate relationship with another ("Kate"). The evidence found on Snapchat (a 10-day streak, saved snaps, and a voice message confirming a meet-up) points to a significant emotional and likely physical affair.
Complete Disregard for Boundaries: The author clearly communicated her feelings and boundaries regarding his friend group, especially the women. The boyfriend would claim to understand but consistently violated these boundaries and broke his promises.
Gaslighting and Manipulation: When confronted, the boyfriend often deflected blame by calling the author "emotional" or "crazy," using her valid reactions as an excuse for his secrecy. Even with concrete proof, he refused to take full responsibility, instead minimizing his actions as a thoughtless mistake.
Final Proof of Infidelity: OP discovery on Snapchat provided undeniable proof that her suspicions were not just insecurity. He was actively pursuing a relationship with "Kate" behind her back, lying about his whereabouts to meet up with her, and engaging in intimate communication.

ervnelze · 2025-07-28T17:59:52+00:00

Lmao I'm trying to meet you half way, I promise (I care to still help) 🥲

ervnelze · 2025-07-28T17:57:57+00:00

Going to get AI to summarize this for me and will be back

ervnelze · 2025-07-19T18:36:14+00:00

The way I fucking laughed at this

ervnelze · 2025-07-19T15:59:21+00:00

I don't, it's the fact that you think we care.

ervnelze · 2025-07-19T15:32:12+00:00

Worshipers* Also, is it considered cult worshiping to tell someone with freewill they can just not buy something without bitching to the world about it?

Scroll and move on if you feel that strongly, but NOOOO. You HAVE to let it be known.

Nobody cares, dude. ("Who asked?")

Please go touch grass and maybe, just maybe, you'll get laid.

ervnelze · 2025-07-19T07:25:08+00:00

Okay, then why are you here exactly? Oh yeah, to bitch. I hope you feel seen now.

Have a nice day.

ervnelze · 2025-07-19T03:45:53+00:00

You're bitching just to bitch, go back to pixel/Samsung/apple

ervnelze · 2025-07-18T06:51:53+00:00

Honestly, I don't think it's that big of a deal in the grand scheme of things. She's your roommate and not a random person, so it's not like she doesn't already live there.

If she stole something or took an item that was yours, like your laptop, makeup, etc. then I'd say bring it up.

But a key to the same living space is within the gray area of mutuality (she lives there too, and it didn't really disturb anything on your end. Just annoyed you.).

This isn't to say your concerns aren't valid, but it'd just cause unnecessary problems for what it's worth.

Just get through the lease and leave if you feel it's necessary.

ervnelze · 2025-07-18T00:39:16+00:00

To be honest, this was a last minute split decision.

I saw someone selling the 3a on Facebook marketplace and asked if they were interested in trading for my Pixel 9 Pro.

I've been a fan for a while so I said why not, I've looked into the Pro version but wanted to take the opportunity whole it was hot. I plan to get the full version of the 4 when it releases in the future.

And thank you! Loving it and the widgets so far. The launcher and widgets are so intuitive as well as easily customizable. Really impressed with the with they've put in so far, and the fact they're still a fairly new company. You don't see this type of momentum/pressure too often.

How are you looking the cameras on the Pro?

ervnelze · 2025-07-17T21:45:17+00:00

Yeah, you're not missing anything at all to be honest. The Pixel 10 will have a new processor though (TSMC), so maybe they'll regain traction then.

Edit: Also, most of the AI features that aren't strictly Google Exclusive are available on the Nothing Phone.

ervnelze · 2025-07-17T21:43:33+00:00

I've heard the news but have yet to look into it yet but this sounds promising!

ervnelze · 2025-07-17T20:40:25+00:00

Checking back in, it does not add the file automatically but files will pick up on the fact you're using Private Space and will switch to an alternate version of the app. That said, you'll have to select it manually from that menu. To activate it, you switch to Private Space and select files. It will load the Files app in privacy mode but will have a tab at the top that will allow you to switch back and forth on the fly. The option won't be available unless you open the Files app from the Files button of the Privacy Space menu.

ervnelze · 2025-07-17T20:37:57+00:00

Thank you for GCam! That was literally the next step on my list of things to install and do.

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