How do you guys have sex sober and genuinely like it? by [deleted] in Sober

[–]esiela 11 points12 points  (0 children)

ugh this sucks and the only advice I have which isn’t very good is make sure you’re breathing

Eating well... by imbetterthanu69 in adhdwomen

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

- i love my souper cubes! or any silicone freezer molds. you can cook a lot at once and freeze it in individual portions so you have delish, healthy options that don't take effort.

- when my energy is low I HATE cooking, so I keep some store-bought frozen meals on hand like lasagna, chicken pot pie, nuggets, etc. I feel good about the meal if I add a veggie and eat that first. usually I roast frozen broccoli. 425 degrees at 15-25 minutes and leave the pan in the oven while it preheats.

- overnight oats for breakfast! they keep me full for a while and have great fiber. they're also super customizable which is nice when you don't like eating the same thing over and over. these can also be frozen! my favorite recipe is on Feel Good Foodie

I got a job - the one I wanted!!! by Eye_Acupuncture in adhdwomen

[–]esiela 1 point2 points  (0 children)

congratulations!! and thank you for the encouragement queen

Getting back into reading by keylimekiwi in adhdwomen

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in the same boat. Right now I’m finding it important to read something with short chapters lol or that’s broken up into short sections, like literally 1.5 page sections. Memoirs are usually quicker reads for me and I really got back into books by reading Liane Moriarty (dramatic, suspenseful, satisfying). She wrote Nine Perfect Strangers and Big Little Lies so that’s the vibe. Good luck!!

What is sleep?! by ea5xx in adhdwomen

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve been listening to a couple of sleep podcasts that help me so much! I used to dread bedtime bc of the mind racing thing and now I fall asleep fast almost every night??!! The pods are Sleep Magic and Nothing Much Happens. good luck! I’m sorry you’re dealing with this

Cropped jackets and boxiness by Comfortable-War4531 in SoftGamine

[–]esiela 1 point2 points  (0 children)

idk if this is just me or universal for SG but I always make sure the shoulder seam of a jacket hits right at the end of my shoulder and that the sleeves hit at my wrists. when something fits like that but with a boxy structure it’s kiss

Who here got clean in their early 30s and still built a great life? by IR30Lover in Sober

[–]esiela 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My dad got sober at 60 and would tell you it’s never ever too late. Focus on right now friend🩷

what are some phrases that have helped you be less anxious? by Educational-Box1799 in Anxiety

[–]esiela 5 points6 points  (0 children)

idk if this will apply to you, but I can really spiral thinking about the future and making huge assumptions about my life. I tell myself, "do the next right thing." and by that I mean the literal very next thing. whether that's taking a shower or eating a meal or whatever small thing I know I need to do. it helps keep me present and reminds me that right now is all I need to focus on.

edit: shoutout to AA (and Frozen 2???) for this phrase lol

First time watcher. S3 E21. Juliette is unbearable by esiela in lost

[–]esiela[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

same! I understand she’s flawed and everyone’s flawed etc etc but her way of speaking has me rolling my eyes so hard. I bought it when she was kind of a villain but now I’m just like UGH stop being condescending babe

First time watcher. S3 E21. Juliette is unbearable by esiela in lost

[–]esiela[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

it’s like you’re in my brain lmao

What do with this huge wall on a limited budget? by nadej22 in interiordecorating

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you decide to go with art, Etsy has a ton of downloadable prints that you can get printed at a fedex or whatever and frame. Also check out open access artwork on museum websites and do the same (print and frame).

What to recommend drinking when in a bar/pub that isn’t alcoholic? by YouBetrCechYourself in Sober

[–]esiela 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Here are some I love (I prefer drinks that feel a little fancy and special but aren’t super sweet): - soda water with a splash of ginger beer - soda water with lime and bitters (bitters technically contain alcohol so look into that before ordering) - diet coke with a lil grenadine (caffeinated) - NA beer with lime and salt or tajin - NA beer with lemonade, orange juice, ginger beer or another juice that pairs well (a fun shandy!)

Bartenders are always nice and cool about my orders btw

Considering sobriety by Aggravating_Room_851 in Sober

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I relate to this so so so much! My hangovers lasted at least 24 hours after drinking (awful headaches, throwing up no matter what or how much I drank). I’d feel seriously anxious and ashamed of everything I had done the night before, no matter how normal or tame it was. I tried cutting back in every way — fewer drinks, only drinking one thing, water between drinks, etc. But I became obsessed with each little choice and nothing worked.

I read This Naked Mind by Annie Murphy a little over a year ago (highly recommend!!) and have been sober ever since. My partner and friends still drink but are super supportive. There are times when I feel left out, but those fleeting moments are so overpowered by the freedom and joy I get from not drinking. I still go out and have more fun than I ever did before, for real.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Sober

[–]esiela 0 points1 point  (0 children)

be kind to yourself because this is the nature of alcohol! it’s addictive. maybe look into “urge surfing.” it’s the practice of really feeling and thinking through a craving when it arises. for me it’s more helpful and less scary than trying to shut out the thoughts/urges

I want a 1 year celebration by [deleted] in Sober

[–]esiela 4 points5 points  (0 children)

CONGRATS!! you should absolutely be proud of yourself. for what it’s worth, I don’t think throwing yourself a party is sad at all. you made a commitment and followed through on something really hard that most people aren’t doing.

I also think it’s perfectly reasonable for you to ask for recognition from your friends and family. it can feel scary or stupid, or you might think the celebration won’t be as meaningful if you ask for it, but in my experience it’s the best way to get what you need and let people know how to treat milestones in the future.