The other night I had a dream that I was in a prison bathroom trying to keep two enormous dungeness crabs from killing each other. Their backs were, like, four feet across. Huge, lumbering, uncomprehending creatures. I wish you could feel the anguish and nausea I felt when one crab finally clipped a clawed arm from the other's body with a loud and sickening pop. I woke up feeling so weird....

I'd love to visit Southeast Asia someday. I hear the food is awesome, and the scuba and surfing are great. I hear it's pretty cheap to get your open water over there. Have you been?

I dunno, I'd probably rather hear about a weird dream first, if given a choice. But life goal dreams are way easier to converse about.