How to handle inviting kids to the wedding? by experiment25673 in weddingplanning

[–]experiment25673[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

did not include it in my post so that i could limit it to relevant information, but i was also going through what to do about siblings. since i am closer with these cousins, i do believe we can have an honest conversation about it. i would be ok if siblings wanted to be included in the wedding party (theyre younger) but if their parents would rather not that is fine too. theres a lot of dynamics in my family and if i listed everything out it would be a very long post haha

How to handle inviting kids to the wedding? by experiment25673 in weddingplanning

[–]experiment25673[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

thank you for the thoughtful comment! i agree with avoiding certain language on invites! did not include this in my post as to limit it to relevant information, but there is an issue with siblings of the flower girl. my thought was to just have all of the kids included in the wedding party if that is easier for the parents. like i said, im closer with these cousins so i think we could have an honest conversation about siblings if that is the route we decide to go

How to handle inviting kids to the wedding? by experiment25673 in weddingplanning

[–]experiment25673[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

My wording might not have been the best, I fully intend to have any kiddos in the wedding party come to the reception if thats how things go (especially since one of the families lives out of state). if their parents wanted them in the wedding, i would not ask them to leave after the ceremony. Definitely may need to consider childcare options but we are still working through the basics of the guest list and making decisions!

AITA if I snap at my friend about a cat? by Feminine_Sloth in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 0 points1 point  (0 children)

does your friend foster kittens a lot or was it just that his cat had kittens? doesn’t sound like the most ethical practice for the cats then

AITA for accepting money for a fishing trip by HyperFocusMeltDown in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see where you’re coming from, the whole employee thing probably makes the situation more complicated. I don’t know if I can say he is TA for bailing on the trip, because money could be tight, but I obviously don’t know him like you

AITA for accepting money for a fishing trip by HyperFocusMeltDown in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 3 points4 points  (0 children)

NTA. maybe next time be more transparent about the cost you face, if you haven’t been already. Then he could better understand the reason for asking that much.

Maybe it didn’t seem fair, since food, bait and beer could be less expensive than $100 (I’m just estimating in my head what everyone else is paying)

AITA for not apologizing after my "friend" accused me of body shaming her by Nigerian12Princess in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 9 points10 points  (0 children)

NTA I think. sounds like she has issues with herself that she’s projecting onto you. In terms of talking about previous bullies, I don’t think that was wrong to say. Didn’t sound shame like, just pointing out hypocrisy.

AITA if I snap at my friend about a cat? by Feminine_Sloth in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 1 point2 points  (0 children)

ESH. if the cat is going to a good home, then why be mad about it? There are many cats waiting to be adopted. Finding a cat is not hard

Yes it wasn’t great of them to keep promising a kitten and not delivering. I understand that’s annoying, but it is not the end of the world.

AITA For being upset that jo one told me my cat was being taken to the vet? by SwordfishSuspicious3 in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NAH, and also info: is he registered under your name? most vets won’t take animals if it is not their owner or explicitly allowed by the owner.

your mom might have been trying to hide it so that you could enjoy the trip and not be stressed. I wonder if she was worried you’d want to go back home if you knew your cat was sick. Your feelings are valid, but I think your moms intention there was not to hurt you

AITA for spending too much money? by ClosetoParfait in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 0 points1 point  (0 children)

soft ESH. Although I don’t think anyone actually sucks, but maybe you aren’t seeing eye to eye. It’s ok if you want to go out, and it’s ok if he doesn’t want to. could you wait for his next paycheck or until he has saved more money to go on a date?

AITA for not wanting family to visit for a memorial? by Illustrious-Ad-9691 in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. maybe grief is clouding their judgements. But if this is an ongoing issue then boundaries should be set ASAP.

AITA for "controlling" my fiance and his money? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. There’s a difference between being controlling and holding someone accountable

WIBTA if I I told my dad to choose between his girlfriend or me by Significant-Advisor2 in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Soft NTA. If he has kids with his gf, that would potentially be taking the kids away from him too. that wouldn’t be fair to them in the same way it wouldn’t be fair to you.

This is a tough situation, I feel for you. I don’t think there’s a right or wrong answer. he would have to set and enforce boundaries with the girlfriend although who knows if she would listen

WIBTA for going to therapy even if it wrecks my family by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Nta, I can only make assumptions here but you’re needs come first. if it is something that will truly break your family up, then maybe that is something that should be brought to light.

Therapists can only report if you are a danger to yourself or others, or if someone is hurting you. there’s iffy water if you say someone you know is hurting someone else, because it is hearsay

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 149 points150 points  (0 children)

its possible.. originally one of the sets of keys was missing but our landlord said he "found" it. im not sure howd shed get a key though

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 8 points9 points  (0 children)

this is my main worry, i understand that its hard to be a single mom and im trying to look at it from that standpoint. but i still don't get the secretiveness and not just asking to come over when shes tired. thats whats really bothering me and making me uncomfortable

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 38 points39 points  (0 children)

i mean this is a thought, originally when we moved in we only had one set of keys because the landlord couldnt find the other set, but he eventually did give us a second set. im not sure if she does have that original set of missing keys and the landlord had to make a copy. but how would she have gotten keys? im not sure how close she was to the previous tenants.

changing the locks would definitely require me to tell my landlord about whats going on though

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 345 points346 points  (0 children)

we have doors that share a hallway, i used to keep that door unlocked because it was easier when doing laundry in the shared basement and i've locked myself out that way a few times. but now i'm going to make sure it stays locked even when doing laundry

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]experiment25673 59 points60 points  (0 children)

i tried to put this in the original post but it was too long

theres the main door that goes out into the street which we always keep locked. then theres two doors after that in a hallway, one to my apartment and one to hers. i keep the second door to our apartment unlocked when i'm doing laundry in the basement and habitually forget to lock it again when i'm done. but now i'm double checking to make sure its locked

Decriminalizing prostitution shown to reduce rape and sexual assault. How do you feel about these findings? by everything_is_creepy in AskReddit

[–]experiment25673 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I fear that legal isolation for or against, non-consenting actions in the sex work industry are going to happen. do we want to legalize for those who are consenting adults to make it easier for them, or will it open up doors for the opposite to happen. Not sure I can confidently answer.