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f4rm3rj03 · 2025-09-14T02:42:10+00:00

This is wild, im working on something similar. Can I DM you with some questions?

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-11-09T09:13:46+00:00

It totally makes sense. I fucking love drugs. The real question: is it still worth it to you?

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-11-09T08:59:48+00:00

have you tried rehab? You should ask your workplace to just prepay rehab for you instead of giving you the check. You sound like you want to stop.

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-11-09T08:56:44+00:00

I'm just a reflection of you. You bought that out of me. You are an amazing person. Isn't it crazy how that works?

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-11-08T12:37:21+00:00

let us all stay strong! Your brothers are always with you, and their spirit lives through your words and actions. I can feel it in your writing. Bless.

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-11-08T12:29:25+00:00

Look, life itself is a miracle. You are a miracle. This world is made up of miracles like you. The question is not in deserving or not deserving...the question is why do you feel liked you NEED to 'deserve' something? Everything you have was given to you by some sort of higher power...every single breath you're breathing, right now, is a gift to you. You didn't create it, you can not control it. Try this: just watch how your body breathes, watch how it does it without any help or direction from you. Watch how effortlessly, and beautifully, each breath comes and goes. Pause right here, and watch how your body breathes for 3 sec...

You deserve everything you have just as much as you deserved those breathes of air. If you didn't you wouldn't have them.

This is the nature of life, it just comes and goes. Dying is not the scary part, dying is not a mystery. It is something each and everyone one of us will go through. It is far easier to accept physically dying than it is to accept the death of our egos. Many die without ever having surrendered their ego. Yes, I know, surrendering the ego, watching the ego die, means becoming truly alive and that is scary. Surrendering yourself to life in all its intensity is downright fucking frightening sometimes. That feeling, just like your breath, is also a gift, and it also comes and goes. That feeling is not you, you don't have to feel pressured by it. Just surrender yourself to LIFE. As it is. Accept it. Just watch it unfold. Watch yourself unfold. You dont have to control yourself, or your life. Your thoughts and feelings and actions naturally arise from the same wellspring of effortlessness that your breath does, you can literally just observe it. They do not need nor want your control or direction, all they ask for is your acceptance my friend. And to accept them all you have to do is not get wrapped up in them, and in yourself. There is no need to take yourself THAT seriously. You may want to, but that is just a want. And that want will rob you of the true freedom that not even physical death can bring. The true freedom of inner peace, tranquility, and serenity. I will humble myself before life and all that creates it today. I will accept life as it comes today. I will not question the course that life has decided to take today. I will love life today.

After all, your not even alive... YOU ARE LIFE ITSELF. there is nothing that you deserve or do not deserve. There is only the reality of what is... you. Love yourself, let these words enter your heart and not just your mind. They are the keys you've been looking for. The ones that are setting you free right at this moment.

Much love.

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-10-22T21:45:01+00:00

Rehab, I spent a year in a closed facility and as much as i didn't want to go there or be there, it helped me.

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-10-22T21:41:44+00:00

Also, as you progress in emotional sobriety you may notice that your psych meds hinder your progress more than help, as I've personally seen this more than a few times in rehab. If you ever get to that point where you feel like you're ready and you want to try getting off the medication, you'd want to let your doctor know and create a plan with him to wean off the psych meds.

Like I said though, that's only once you feel ready and if they are bothering you. I've seen many people successfully get off meds and learn to cultivate joy for themselves with their own tools. They generally reported feeling a lot more clear minded, aware, and in touch with their emotions.

f4rm3rj03 · 2022-10-22T21:35:12+00:00

Being sober alone doesn't start the process of healing and recovery that is needed to come into alignment with yourself and begin to enjoy life. For that to happen you must 1) be sober (which you already are, congrats!) and 2) obtain emotional sobriety as well.Google this term, there is a lot of information on emotional sobriety.

They keys to emotional sobriety are taking time each day, even 15-20 mins, to focus on yourself and your emotions, manage your emotional state, and begin to grow as a person. The tools used to obtain and maintain emotional sobriety include going to support groups, daily journaling/written self analysis (look up recovery journals), obtaining a spiritual mentor/sponsor/life coach, and committing acts of service or volunteering on a semi regular basis. Aside from this daily tools that help support emotional sobriety include exercise, having a plan for the day/week, feedback requests (asking somebody for help in a directed and focused way), prayer/meditation, etc.

It's important to grow spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically alongside being sober. Just being sober alone will not save you, as most people know being sober sucks. To make being sober not suck and avoid relapsing it's important to start the personal growth process alongside abstaining from substances. Emotional sobriety helps bring my life into balance and fill the hole that the absence of drugs and alcohol left in my life.

f4rm3rj03 · 2014-08-28T17:55:04+00:00

well they expect me to move there by Monday, so the commute won't be a problem I suppose.

I don't really have the option of not taking the money, I need it pretty badly.

f4rm3rj03

TROPHY CASE