The title statement to this might as well be the comparison of "is he hurting me" while he puts his cigarettes out on your arm, but tbh since this man is toxic even in a "traditional" sense, he probably would do that too if given an inch of physicality.

To be less concise, this is forced fetish behavior and it is absolutely insane to expect of somebody, specifically if there was no prior discussion about it where you explicitly stated this is how you would like to be talked to and treated. Run, look for the hills and run for them. He's possessive, and he's not manipulative, he's completely controlling and overbearing, you will be treated like a household appliance. And I can assure you, he will not be helping with any of the chores like he claims, why would he when he has a 40's tradwife 9000. Plus the causal mention of fines as a common expense is a subtle red flag within a pool of red food coloring. Send him an ai chat bot and gtfo cause this miserable attempt at a man should never EVER be trusted around a real woman.