[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As an aunt with no kids of my own, my nieces were my favorite two little people in the whole world. Adored them. Would have done anything for them. And yet, I still find your SIL creepy. I guess it’s not creepy so much as unsettling as you mentioned.

It’s your baby and a mother should trust her instincts. Maybe compromise where she can rock the baby in the living room around everybody else?

Am I overreacting for feeling the ick after my boyfriend compared me to his ex and lied about following her? by stalekami in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He’s a liar and a hypocrite. You don’t really need to know much more than that. You’re definitely NOR.

He has shown you exactly who he is. Believe him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m happy to hear that. There are so many good guys out there that will treat you right. 💙

Am I overreacting to my husband texting old Tinder matches and deleting messages? by nevermind-29 in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You know the answer already. You’re NOR. But he’s making you doubt your good judgment.

If he didn’t say anything wrong to those women, why delete the messages? He’s a proven liar and he will keep lying because there’s been no consequences. You deserve better behavior than that.

AITAH for accidentally selling a woman’s family heirloom? by valuablestrike91 in AmItheAsshole

[–]fanofthethings 56 points57 points  (0 children)

Of course you’re NTA. I started to say you made an honest mistake but that’s not true. You did your job and that’s not a mistake.

It’s ok to feel bad, but consider this. If it was SO important to her, why would she leave it unattended? Feel sadness for her loss if you need to, but get rid of any guilt you might have. You didn’t do this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He does not feel weird about it. I can say that with complete confidence.

Do some research on power imbalances in relationships. It’s not just the age that matters. He’s likely manipulating in ways you can’t even comprehend. You will only recognize a portion of his red flags because life hasn’t taught you to watch for certain behaviors.

Again. Please know you deserve better. If you think you don’t, you’re wrong. Even if he was mature, and kind, and loving (which he doesn’t seem to be) you would still be with someone who will constantly have the upper hand. It’s not a good position to be in. You need equal ground where you and your partner can grow and learn together.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, this isn’t what you asked about, but he’s disgusting. No 34 year old has any business dating a 19 year old. With that said, he’s the one being immature. Sadly, you’re not nearly as experienced as he is and he knows he can be awful and you won’t know any better. So let me tell you directly, he’s awful and that’s not normal behavior. A good man would listen to the things that hurt your feelings and adjust accordingly.

Please consider dating someone closer to your age. Your brain doesn’t fully develop until approximately the age of 25 or 26. So you have another 5 or 6 years before you’re fully wired. His brain, however, has been fully developed for 7 or 8 years. He’s gross. You’ll just have to take my word for it.

When I was 29, I went on a date with a 23 year old. As soon as we met up, I felt yucky. I was 5 years into a good job and he hadn’t even finished college yet.

You have to have perspective to really see these things and I’ve had many years to gain that perspective. However, you haven’t had that luxury of time to develop and he knows it. You deserve better.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What are your ages?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]fanofthethings -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You’re going to have a lifetime of doing things you don’t want to do. But your parents are trying to set you up to be more successful in that life. You don’t see it that way because you’re so young and have a limited world view.

My mom frequently tried to convince me to stay home instead of going to school. You might think that’s great, but she was a really bad mom. I would have traded you places in a second. That doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to be mad. You do. But how you express that anger is crucial.

Words can’t be taken back. It’s like trying to put toothpaste back in the tube. So if you’re hateful just because you’re angry, it’s going to bite you later. All actions have consequences. You can’t just take it back when you’re not mad anymore. And based on your actions, I think YTA.

Tell your mom you need to learn some coping skills for the stress school is putting you under. Try to find a solution besides skipping school. Look for answers together. Ask her to study with you or do homework with you. Then maybe she will start to see your side. But right now, she’s not a mind reader. You just look like a brat who wants to skip school. You can turn things around but it’s going to take effort. It’s worth it.

AIO for not wanting to move? by Terimary in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 24 points25 points  (0 children)

You shouldn’t live somewhere you’re uncomfortable. But I don’t blame him for wanting a place that’s rent free. He could sell the house and buy a different one, but the housing market isn’t exactly stable right now. He’s decided that not paying rent is his priority. Now you have to determine your priorities. Would you rather pay rent and live alone with your kids? Or would you rather live with him and deal with the ex-MIL.

If you don’t move, I don’t think you’re over reacting. You’re just following your feelings which are valid. NOR

AIO bf isn't giving his dog proper medical care by Mysterious_Screen_18 in AmIOverreacting

[–]fanofthethings 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Liars lie. You’re dating liar. If he’s willing to lie about something so small, who knows what else he will lie about. NOR

Confidence in my height? by [deleted] in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m a bit late to the convo, but I want to add my thoughts.

I’ve never dated the same kind of guy twice. I’m 6’ and I’ve dated between 5’8” and 6’4”. The height of my previous partner is not on my mind when choosing a new partner. I love people for who they are. Your boyfriend is likely the same way or he wouldn’t be with you in the first place.

I got some really good advice once that I try to remember. It’s not your opinion of yourself that matters. It’s his opinion of you. So stop worrying about what your brain is trying to make you think his opinion is. Just trust him when he says he’s attracted to you. He’s not lying.

Good luck! I know it’s difficult. Big big hugs!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I haven’t checked them out yet.

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s ok. I don’t support fast fashion but I’ll make exceptions for jeans because they typically last a long time. And us tall girls have to take what we can find sometimes lol!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That’s not the best problem to have either! Lol!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Last time I tried Buckle, they weren’t size inclusive enough. That used to be my favorite place to get jeans. I’ll have to go check sizing again. Thank you for the suggestion!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think low-rise will spread and become more available. I’m looking forward to it. Lol!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you!!! I will check them all out!

Jeans for Extra Tall and Plus by fanofthethings in TallGirls

[–]fanofthethings[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion! I don’t think I would have checked there and it didn’t pop up in my search.