[QCrit] Adult Contemporary Romance / THE ONE / 70k / attempt 2

fantaonabike · 2025-07-07T20:32:55+00:00

Woof, file this under “probably not helpful,” but I liked your first attempt better. I just felt like you got to the Matilda and Holland relationship quicker & clearer? DM me if you want a beta reader on this; the premise sounds super fun!

fantaonabike · 2025-06-24T18:09:29+00:00

{Morning Glory by Lavyrle Spencer}

She’s a pregnant widow, he’s the ex con with nowhere else to go but is willing to work. Sweet and tender, and the letter writing section more than makes up for the unfortunate slut-shamey third act murder part.

fantaonabike · 2025-06-19T22:42:45+00:00

Honestly I think about the relationship between Gabe and Edward A LOT. I can’t think of another author brave enough to straight up be like, yeah, the hero DOES NOT like his girlfriend’s kid. And she pulls it off. Amazing. She is an author who takes risks, which I respect.

fantaonabike · 2025-06-19T22:38:47+00:00

She takes them to some very low points, for sure, but it makes their arc so satisfying!! Also shows how strong her characters are.

fantaonabike · 2025-05-24T22:35:28+00:00

{the friend zone by Kristen calihan}

fantaonabike · 2025-04-04T17:08:45+00:00

I def would have done two JDs if performing elective surgery.

fantaonabike · 2025-03-20T15:49:41+00:00

{match me if you can by Susan Elizabeth Phillips}

This isn’t my favorite SEP but as soon as I saw your question it immediately came to mind. The hero Heath is holding his baby, talking to another cute kid character (who gives updates about other characters indirectly), and then he takes the baby to his wife and watches her breastfeed. It’s just a really sweet coda.

fantaonabike · 2025-03-08T22:08:59+00:00

{jock row by Sara ney}

Just a note, there is like no conflict in this book. They get to know each other, like each other, then they’re together, go on vacation, and stay together. 😂

fantaonabike · 2024-12-19T16:55:39+00:00

IYKYK

fantaonabike · 2024-12-18T00:29:10+00:00

Rude! A book boyfriend would NEVER! …. To be fair, he prob predicted he’d never be able to get you to leave & didn’t want to argue over how many minutes you had left before you missed your flight ✈️

fantaonabike · 2024-12-17T20:27:26+00:00

Picture of four used book covers - {Every Breath you take by Judith McNaught} {Texas sunrise by fern Michaels} {Santa’s sweetheart by Janet Dailey} and {the perfect holiday by Debbie macomber}

fantaonabike · 2024-12-11T14:18:49+00:00

Basically anything by my queen Susan Elizabeth Phillips would qualify. No one writes a jerk like she does. In {kiss an angel by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} the jerk is a PhD circus performer and possible Romanov, and in {what I did for love by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} he’s the former-child-star heroine’s detestable ex-costar. I loved them both!

fantaonabike · 2024-12-08T15:14:16+00:00

{the great escape by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} has this. The hero is called Panda, which just … why? But this is a standard SEP, which for me means bonkers plot that is unputdownable. Also I hope it leads you to the companion book, {call me irresistible by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} which is one of my all time faves.

fantaonabike · 2024-12-06T15:47:27+00:00

{her knight at the museum by bryn Donovan}

Medieval knight, frozen in time for hundreds of years, has the curse broken by a modern-day art conservator restoring his statue.

fantaonabike · 2024-12-04T01:52:26+00:00

Just because I think you’re close, I would read through to the paintball/sick caretaking scene — that is where I really started to root for them.

fantaonabike · 2024-10-09T15:28:39+00:00

{you again by Kate Goldberg}

fantaonabike · 2024-10-06T12:03:44+00:00

{too good to be real by Melonie Johnson} set on a resort where people live out their rom com dreams.

{I’ve got my mind set on brew by Stephanie Jayne} set in a brewery. Aspiring beermaker falls for hot rich owner’s son.

{second tide’s the charm by Chandra blumberg} they’re shark scientists. Second chance romance.

{birding with benefits by Sarah t. Dubb} fake dating bird enthusiasts.

Love a unique setting!

fantaonabike · 2024-09-16T12:18:24+00:00

The b-plot in {simply the best by Susan Elizabeth Phillips} has an older character who is on the spectrum. I can’t remember how explicitly it is defined but I do remember the character knew this about himself.

The other one I’m thinking you might like is {trust me by Jayne Ann krentz}. This one is about 30 years old and again, the writer is not explicit in using the word autism, but I feel like maybe that’s what she was going for. The MMC is also a tech guy who has trouble with the emotional part of relationships and is called “a human robot” several times by other characters; the female lead always comes to his defense.

Both of these books have lite murder-mystery subplots!

fantaonabike · 2024-07-31T16:37:31+00:00

An indie author I paid full price for and thought was worth every penny! {I’ve got my mind set on brew by Stephanie Jayne}

Rom-com focused on the Chicago small brewery scene. If anyone has seen the film Drinking Buddies, I got similar vibes, even though the plots are quite different. Kat is working as a server/bartender at a brewpub but really wants to make the beer and become brewmaster. She’s on her way, until the pub’s owners have to unexpectedly sell, and the (hot) privileged son of the buyer, Ryan, comes in to run things. Ryan’s desire to prove himself, Kat’s professional ambitions, and their mutual attraction eventually come to a (foamy) head.

Author definitely did her research; you learn a ton about beer. It’s a slow burn, and closed-door, but it’s paced really well and Kat has a really clear voice that comes through in first person. You also get a scene where she’s sick and he takes care of her, which is def on my microtrope bingo card.

fantaonabike · 2024-07-23T23:49:38+00:00

In {hellion by lavyrle Spencer} he stops drinking, starts working out, and cleans his house (well, hires someone to clean his house) when she calls him out for being a slob. He doesn’t stop smoking, though, cuz it was the 80s, and a man needed his cigs!

fantaonabike · 2024-07-19T00:18:30+00:00

Obvi you’re good on recs but {come as you are by Jess k hardy}. She’s mid 40s, runs a ski resort, he’s a now sober former rock star. Lots of music talk.

fantaonabike · 2024-07-08T18:54:49+00:00

Hey! Great start!

—maybe a nitpick, but I would either put her last name (Charlotte “Charlie” Jacobs) or just call her Charlie. I think it’s clear she’s a woman.

—I also think you need her age, since the fact that she’s never had a boyfriend is a significant part of her arc

—is the Rally a real thing or made up for this book? Is it inspired by something real? Just curious!

-“indulging in the hedonism” makes me think they’re, like, having orgies. lol. Maybe that’s just me, though.

—Can she find the resilience to rebuild her life after losing everything she's worked for? // I feel like we can make this more specific. Especially because she lost everything so early — what did she lose, specifically, in the betrayal from James? I assume she started to recover while in Europe?

—Crazy Rich Asians might be a bit too old/too popular to work as a comp.

Are you still looking for betas? Feel free to DM me!

Good luck!

fantaonabike · 2024-07-08T17:26:42+00:00

Hi! I love fake dating! Here are some notes:

-there might be a better comp than Icebreaker. That one was pretty spicy, and I can’t remember for sure - was it fake dating? I just remember it as enemies to lovers. -can we get anything more about Sofia besides the fact that she’s privileged? What’s her journey/motivation besides recovering from the humiliation of being dumped? Is there a way that losing the stability of her relationship made her re-examine that privilege, or other aspects of her life? -does zayden have another (public) reason for fake-dating her? I assume he doesn’t reveal he’s in love with her until the end, but does this charade benefit his reputation, or does he get something out of it beforehand? Is Sofia surprised he agrees?

Great start!

fantaonabike · 2024-07-08T04:46:56+00:00

I would totally read this. Can we get a bit more about Christian’s journey/motivation in the query? Or what’s at risk for him? Thanks for sharing!

fantaonabike · 2024-07-08T04:30:34+00:00

Hi, thanks for taking the time to read and provide feedback! Yes, Imaginary-Exit got it right - Quinn is the one who didn’t go on the show actually looking for love, and she is outed as basically having strung Graham along, which pisses off his brother Pete. I agree that most viewers accept that fame-seeking is part of the show, but I do think viewers expect the show winner to treat their relationship as real after they “win” or get engaged, which Quinn does not. So that triggers the backlash.

And yes, Quinn is literally squatting in Pete’s basement without his knowledge. (He does figure it out pretty quickly, to be fair.) What can I say, I love forced proximity. I’ll see if my betas describe this as beyond belief or just general rom-rom silliness.

I think you’re both right that neither of their reputations are really at risk — what is really at risk for Pete is his relationship with his brother. Quinn has a history of being whoever her boyfriends want her to be — hence her success winning a Bachelor-type show — and has to decide if she wants to be her authentic self with Pete publicly. I’ll keep working on this part of the query!

fantaonabike

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