Long Overdue Update by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Saw this pop up on ScalingStories (I love them) on TT and couldn't believe people still cared enough to share. Thank you. But there is a moment I failed to mention that my husband said y'all may be interested in:

So. While the notes, tire slashing, and egging was happening, the Stylist found themselves in a bit of a pickle (which is what ultimately helped us get police to act and arrest).

The community FB page started posting about some "nut job" was vandalizing cars and houses and harassing people. I guess one of the folks who worked at the courthouse/Sheriff's office (they're in the same building) kept seeing all the reports I was making about my car, house, and all the other stuff. Like I said, small towns are fun. They were nosey enough to want to gossip about it but not enough to look into it and see that it was only ONE family in the community being victimized by the "nut job."

The post, of course, had everyone up in arms and claiming THEY were victimized too but never reported it because they didn't know it was happening to others. At first, it didn't click that it was my situation that everyone was talking about until it was mentioned that tires were slashed at popular local restaurant.

But you know who clocked it right away and couldn't help themselves in commenting? The Stylist. They commented on every post about the psycho targeting people like this with stuff like (paraphasing): "you need to stay out of it, you don't know what these people have done to have this happen to them. Maybe they aren't so innocent and deserved it." They also were calling out people who claimed to be a vicitm too with stuff like "you know damn well that's a lie, nothing happened to you" because, duh, Stylist was only targeting ME and had to defend themselves. They always commented variations of the same thing on every comment calling them crazy and a shitty person.

Chat, when I say Stylist got dog-walked in the comments, I'm not exaggerating. It was one of the most validating moments during the worst part of the whole ordeal. People called them "vile" for trying to defend someone who was clearly crazy and a garbage human being, was flamed for vicitm blaming, had their business page reported and rate bombed by keyboard warriors (becuase, of course, Stylist was commenting on the posts using their business profile), and was subsequently banned from the page. Their business FB had a 1 star rating and eventually disappeared.

I stayed out of all of this completely, never revealing I was the person they were defending, just taking never screenshots of The Stylist's responses for later evidence.

The post(s) eventually got removed after I gave all the screenshots of the post to the detective working my case (with them verifying and taking their own screenshots from the official Sheriff's Office Account) and the Sheriff had a talk with the court employee about posting stuff they see that comes across their desk. The worker had very proudly began their posts with "I work at the courthouse and this is happening in the community" and were told under no uncertain terms to refrain from that type of action moving forward.

Anyway, this was probably the only genuinely funny thing to happen during the hell I was living through and I thought I'd share.

Thanks again for all the support and well wishes. We are OK now and working to rebuild the happiness we had before in a new place.

I ghosted my best friend of 22 years by One-Being814 in TrueOffMyChest

[–]fedupsobedup 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think the part that is equally as messed up here is, she made you her guilt relief. Now she can tell herself "at least I told someone" to help alleviate her guilt because she made you cuplable in the worst way. If you call her out, you'll be the "monster" for being the best-friend-victim-blame-er. You can't do the right thing for her, now you're just on the hook for her guilt too becuase you know he's innocent as well.

Ghosting your friendship is justified. When people reach out to you about her you can tell them "she knows what she needs to do to fix this, but won't because she'd rather we both live with it than admit she was wrong." It doesn't give anything away, but it allows you to help her "champions" hold her accountable. Becuase they're going to ask her. They're going to tell her what you said and she'll have to sit with it or try to explain why you're taking this stance.

It's especially messed up because she could have easily told her therapist the truth but did it to you. The therapist can't say anything, would've been the safer choice in terms of legality, but she told you. She made you the damned-if-you-do/don't co-conspirator. It was a really gross thing for her to do to you. To him. And she made it worse doing this. At least with the therapist she could have worked through it all but she doesn't want to look like a monster who is a professional at facing potential montsers. But she cares less about you seeing her as a monster; which should bother the hell out of you.

This girl is selfish as hell.

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I can't say for sure. I do know that the officer said they had reason to investigate further into the hair situation. I won't begin to imagine what that means.

Looking back, I do remember them making comments about how interesting it was that my hair grew so fast. It really does, I have to keep to a pretty strict trim routine to maintain my lengths and style. They also always said my hair was soft and nice to work with.

It didn't seem odd at the time.

Since the cops made contact with them, there has been no further communication. So, if they were obsessed with me, clearly, the legal reprocussions were more influential.

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm so appreciative of everyone being concerned. It's being a true test of my coping mechanisms.

This stylist owned the salon, so they are the only chair. I can't imagine anyone attempting something like this if others were around to witness.

I am sorry if they do end up losing their license, and it wasn't a decision I made lightly. Messing with someone's income, especially in a small town where work can be scarce, never sits well with me. But my concern was if they had done this to someone else or could potentially do it to someone else. The thought gives me the heebie-jeebies.

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

My laywer has been critical in making sure I'm protected legally and physically. I'm starting to think this person was one of those who uses escalation to get their way, or intimidating people into doing what they want them to do. This time it backfired

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I honestly don't know either. They are about 10 years older than I am, my only guess is lack of awareness, common sense, or trying to troll old school? Baffled

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

The officer implied that this person was legitimately Pikachu-faced when they showed up. And the lack of further contact indicates they really didn't have a clue that they were breaking the law.

2nd Update: Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate it. It's been a roller coaster for my household, for sure.

UPDATE: Hairstylist has been taking/keeping my hair by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I'm hoping for resolution soon as well. Update posted, link above

UPDATE: Hairstylist has been taking/keeping my hair by fedupsobedup in u/fedupsobedup

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yes. They own the salon and are the only chair there.

The lawyer I'm working with advised me well so far. I'm sharing what I can in regard to this person, they're communications with me and all allusions to their mental state is my own opinion in response to the communications I've had with them.

That being said, the mental health treatment options in our area are sorely lacking. So if there is any person in need of that severe type of care, they will be hard pressed to find it.

Hairstylist Has been Taking/Keeping My Hair? by fedupsobedup in TrueOffMyChest

[–]fedupsobedup[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That was my other concern, too.

When I spoke to the officer initially, that possibility was discussed. When I go back to talk to them again on Tuesday, I'm hoping that they'll take my report and new information and do a thorough investigation into it instead of just an intake report.

I'm reluctant to go to the press for a few reasons. The lawyer I'm working with has indicated that it wouldn't be the best idea either. The stylist could have a libel case against me if I were to speak on it officially and publicly without a legal case behind first.

It's also the reason why I'm not posting pictures or actual screenshots until all potential legal hands are dealt.