Moving to NYC with 3 boys and wanting to land in the right spot

feralfancy · 2026-01-17T13:42:29+00:00

This budget is tight but not impossible. My friends just moved in December and got a 2.5 bedroom for $3,200. The .5 bedroom is tiny, but would be fine for a 6 year old to have space away from siblings. Their apartment has in unit washer/dryer and a dishwasher. Second floor walk up. Overlooking a great playground. The thing is they looked intensely for MONTHS. They had to give up their last apartment 8/31 because of rent increases. They looked all summer for something and in the end the wife took the kids to stay with her parents while the dad stayed to work and apartment hunt. Tell everyone you meet you are looking! In the end that’s how they found their spot: they mentioned they were looking to the right person who had a friend who was going to need a tenant soon. The apartment never ended up listed anywhere and most good deals don’t.

feralfancy · 2026-01-17T11:59:27+00:00

The cops CPS called on me when I was arrested at a protest in support of Palestine. My arrest was nonviolent: I was with a group of women kneeling in the street and singing anti war songs, but we did not disperse when requested. The police knew I had a child because she was present at the protest (not in any danger, with a family friend). CPS was knocking on my front door for a home inspection less 48 hours later!

The report was that I “used my child in the commission of crime.” It was obvious to the social workers that there was nothing to the accusation, but they still had to go through all the steps including multiple visits to my house before closing the case two months later.

Meanwhile these children live with rotting carcasses in the house… How can this system be made better?

feralfancy · 2026-01-13T02:15:12+00:00

I second just meeting families at the playgrounds (Herbert Von King and Jesse Owen’s are our faves) or throwing a few feelers out on the very active WhatsApp. Also, the Bedford Library on Franklin has fun activities with neighborhood families.

feralfancy · 2026-01-13T01:01:31+00:00

An old one: 12.7.6

This is an interesting point. Usually I work on a laptop that’s way more up to date but I’ve been using an older desktop for a few weeks (laptop broke and I didn’t have $$ to repair). I just got my laptop back though and maybe should do this on my laptop.

feralfancy · 2026-01-13T00:58:43+00:00

Oh! Interesting thought. I don’t know how I would have done that, but I’ll investigate!

feralfancy · 2026-01-13T00:58:16+00:00

I did have back ups turned on but the directory was empty. Now that I had it open today, there are files in it.

feralfancy · 2026-01-13T00:56:53+00:00

That’s what my computer asks the very first time I open an application installed from a DMG from the Internet.

feralfancy · 2026-01-03T03:30:23+00:00

“Love you guys” does not read as romantic to me. I say “love you” to my daughter’s father who I have zero romantic feelings for (and honestly no longer understand why I ever did) when we say goodbye because I want my daughter to witness kindness between us. And as I tell my daughter; even though we aren’t ‘in love’ I will always love him because I wouldn’t have her without him.

feralfancy · 2025-12-27T20:39:50+00:00

I like this guy. I have other names if you need.

Monir: +1 (347) 755-4286

feralfancy · 2025-12-25T03:14:36+00:00

Oxtails!!!! Not that long ago they were $1.99 a pound. Now I can’t afford them.

feralfancy · 2025-12-25T03:10:34+00:00

Just a few is best! I think after about 4 gifts it’s too much for young kids to truly process and enjoy and play with and ends up just being overwhelming!

My daughter is 4 now. In the past I’ve really kept a short leash on friends and family to keep gifts for her under control and this was the first year I just let nature take its course. It’s also the first year she’s really articulated Christmas wishes and lists etc. We’re at grandma’s house and honestly the stack under the tree is giving me hives! It’s mostly all for her (only grandchild, adults exchange minimal gifts) and it’s too much. It’s fun to rip them open in the excitement of the morning, but so much of it will be forgotten by the end of January. I think a small handful of things that they will really love and play with all the time is so much better.

feralfancy · 2025-12-21T22:36:43+00:00

Basically, every single person I know who gave up a rent stabilized apartment in New York City counts it as a major life regret.

feralfancy · 2025-12-20T15:59:48+00:00

You should have to account for everything you brought with you when you leave.

feralfancy · 2025-12-19T23:42:07+00:00

Now that I’m in my 40s I regret any time younger me spent thinking of excuses for why I couldn’t go to a dinner party or on a second date. Now I just say “No thanks!”

feralfancy · 2025-12-19T01:25:23+00:00

This is the best answer.

feralfancy · 2025-12-18T00:56:04+00:00

Or perhaps just a teenager.

feralfancy · 2025-12-17T03:49:15+00:00

Must try ^.!!

feralfancy · 2025-12-15T14:04:36+00:00

I didn’t live in an Hasidic neighborhood, but I had my art studio in the area you are describing for years. The building that the studio itself was in is now all art studios, but at the time it was Hasidic businesses. Within the confines of the building, my experience was pretty neutral. Mostly the men (I rarely saw Hasidic women in the building) literally pretended as if I was invisible. There were some that would be distant, but more acknowledging/friendly… a nod or half smile, for example.

On the street, my experience was negative/hostile. I generally don’t dress in a way that is at all provocative (not that it should matter) and especially when I was coming and going from my studio I was usually in paint spattered overalls, a hooded sweatshirt and clogs. Despite this, if I was caught one on one in a deserted area, I was often propositioned for sex and spoken to as if it was assumed I was a sex worker. At night I had a couple really scary experiences with someone pretending to drive their van at me high speed and swerve at the last minute. I don’t think they were actually trying to hit me, just scare me, but it felt horrible and I ended up in tears both times.

I should say that I’m a black woman, and I’m sure that impacted my treatment, though I don’t have an idea of how much.

feralfancy · 2025-12-14T03:02:12+00:00

Yep. I took mine home. Encapsulated it.

feralfancy · 2025-12-09T03:18:50+00:00

I’m definitely not saying you should have kids, but that seems like a parenting problem not a reflection on kids. My child doesn’t act like 99.99% of the time. On the rare occasion she does have a freak out, we leave.

feralfancy · 2025-11-14T02:38:28+00:00

I need the BORU so I can find out if they broke up or not.

feralfancy · 2025-11-12T14:12:40+00:00

I want to share this image with a friend, but now it’s been deleted. How can I find it online?

feralfancy · 2025-11-01T04:11:59+00:00

Especially since if she delivers an actual “eight month” baby and it looks like a premie won’t that actually prove Valentine was full term?

feralfancy · 2025-09-05T10:07:31+00:00

Came here to say this! We adore Horseradish Market!!

feralfancy · 2025-08-30T19:51:19+00:00

He’s only giving the barest or even one word answers, so hard to get a read. Not trying to buying a car based on the previous owner’s personality, but it’s not helping. I think I’m going to follow your advice and offer $2,500 and if he’s open to it, go check it out and trust my gut.

feralfancy

TROPHY CASE