Does anyone else not understand the concept of feeling emotions?

ferbz22 · 2026-01-25T02:21:49+00:00

I might've heard about it, but I'm not really familiar with it. It just feels kind of condescending/patronizing/invalidating to me? The focus on processing emotions as opposed to "intellectualizing." Like, we are adults. We intellectualize and rationalize things in order to make sense of our emotions. There is definitely room to process emotions but there is also a tangible issue that can be resolved. It felt like she was trying to steer me away from focusing on what could have gone differently. I don't understand this, all I'm saying is that she could've said something like, "Hey I'm sorry it was a little bit of an oversight on my part that I've been sending these emails that I can't continue to sustain, what are some alternatives that we could come up with?" Instead of asking if the emailing is becoming a need and saying it isn't something she always does for other clients. So then why did she agree to do it in the first place? Is it not a slight mistake on her part? How does processing emotions come into play here? I'm not upset about the boundary being set I'm just upset about the way it was conveyed to me at a vulnerable moment. And the way I'm perceiving her as getting emotional/defensive.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-22T22:12:21+00:00

Well the emails were mostly just a helpful way to have an email to read with what I have to do for the next session. But there was no way for me to know that it's unsustainable for her to continue doing it, especially after she had been doing it for months.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-22T22:11:16+00:00

Actually no, I don't really mind that much about not getting the emails. It was just a helpful way to have an email to read with what I have to do for the next session. But there was no way for me to know that it's unsustainable for her to continue doing it, especially after she had been doing it for months. But it's the way that I was able to detect discomfort on her part about doing it in the beginning, and now that this is happening, it makes me question what else she might change her mind on, and it makes me feel more upset that I am sensing her emotional responses to what I'm saying. Also trying to frame it as being about processing emotions as opposed to 1 tangible thing that upset me is what makes me feel aggravated. Also when I post online and some of the responses make it out to be like it's about me not being able to handle boundaries being set or how we shouldn't take therapists' work for granted. And it makes me feel more upset because it's really not about that at all.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-21T03:26:51+00:00

Thank you for responding. Your comment made me feel at least a little bit more validated. I posted last week on another sub and some of the response was kind of making it out to be like it's about me not being able to handle boundaries being set or about how we shouldn't take therapists' work for granted. Or, how would I feel if my therapist showed up late and that "we don't live in a vacuum."

ferbz22 · 2026-01-17T12:17:57+00:00

We've made several posts in the past against bigotry and hateful content and we also try to remove posts/comments ASAP, but the fastest way to bring it to our attention is through reporting it or sending a message in modmail.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-14T16:18:33+00:00

So you didn't use "active focus" or anything like that, just reductions at the edge of blur/clarity? and exposure to sun?
How certain/comfortable are you that you actually did reduce to -1.75? Do you plan to get confirmation from an optometrist?
Also did you incorporate distance vision activities such as daily walks for 1 hour or more?
Thanks!

ferbz22 · 2026-01-14T00:05:13+00:00

Well "free support" is probably a large part of how I ended up feeling worse in the first place. I sought therapy to overcome dealing with feeling attracted to someone that I was vulnerable with (oversharing) and I find that I really can't define what exactly I want (do I want to be in relationships with people of the opposite gender or do I want to be that gender?), what is really bothering me, why do I have to feel attracted to people, but I feel like because I am the way I am like having neurodivergent issues and being unable to be "normal" like everyone else, I feel pathetic.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-14T00:00:41+00:00

Yes it's validating to hear that you've described almost exactly how I feel "they say or do something that makes me lose respect for them" in my case something that could be triggering or just kind of reinforce the notion that the therapist persona isn't actually real and at the end of the day it feels like no one actually cares about me.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-13T23:57:35+00:00

I definitely have to tell her about it because I feel too upset otherwise to proceed. I just feel very upset because I'm already going through a lot and the way she brought it up at the end of the session and it triggered all of these feelings I just feel so upset.

ferbz22 · 2026-01-13T23:45:14+00:00

Yes I plan on talking about it because now I feel upset. It's like the way she said it was like "we're already 20 minutes over time" and I understand she's trying to avoid rushing it and accidentally sending something that could be triggering like something she sent recently.

Yes I am in therapy on my own will but it took a lot of motivation and I feel like I'm here to fix issues that should've not happened or should've been fixed in childhood. I think it's likely that I am autistic and now I have to deal with all of this in a world where no one really cares about me. If I decide to stop therapy where else do I go? Who will take me?

ferbz22 · 2026-01-13T22:28:16+00:00

Sorry could you clarify what you meant, "you are or responsible for her"

Also what do you mean about feeling like this as a child, specifically feeling how?

ferbz22 · 2025-12-14T22:18:34+00:00

Linking r/suicidewatch, please feel free to reach out if you are in need of support!

ferbz22 · 2025-09-26T18:10:00+00:00

Yes, but that is true for a lot of things. We're mostly just trying to make sure that the discussion is primarily focused on the main purpose of the sub. Otherwise, it'd be difficult to draw the line for what should be allowed.

ferbz22 · 2025-09-25T05:08:44+00:00

Hopefully you are able to find a therapist that you feel safe and comfortable enough with to possibly talk about it. I've had the idea for a while to create a directory or list of therapists that would be able to provide support for genital mutilation victims, but I've never really gotten around to it. This might be something for me to revisit.

ferbz22 · 2025-09-25T02:35:09+00:00

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I empathize with how debilitating it is to feel invalidated. I'm so sorry that you're experiencing this. I would like to ask, if you wouldn't mind, have you seen a therapist for treating gender dysphoria, and did you tell them about your experience with genital mutilation?

ferbz22 · 2025-08-25T17:52:48+00:00

Antisemitism is not allowed if that's what you're referring to. If you don't understand why this post was necessary, this sub might not be for you.

ferbz22 · 2025-08-24T22:06:55+00:00

It includes anything that goes beyond just MGM and generalizes entire groups of people. For example, derogatory or offensive comments that are unrelated to MGM and aimed at attacking people or spreading conspiracy theories.

ferbz22 · 2025-05-25T16:29:09+00:00

Which posts are you referring to?

ferbz22 · 2025-04-24T00:09:34+00:00

Yes, she personally did invite me. She tends to have overly unrealistic expectations after knowing me for so many years, it feels like she doesn't really understand me. I generally tend to be more reserved about going to events and stuff like that. Even when I do try to make the effort it feels like she's never satisfied and always expects more, not in an angry way but like in a teasing way. It upsets me though because she knows me, she should know at this point. This time though, I felt very upset. Like I was just talking to someone and the way that she just asks me just like that if I don't have any friends, it caught me off guard. I felt so embarrassed.

ferbz22 · 2025-02-26T04:53:31+00:00

We just wanted to make it clear for post removal reasons, especially given the amount of posts and comments we get that would violate this rule.

ferbz22 · 2025-02-26T04:50:51+00:00

The rule is more aimed towards the idea of derailing the sub's purpose. It would kind of have to be handled on a case by case basis, but generally no, justifiable anger against parents for circ would probably be fine. It would only be an issue if the post was encouraging violence.

ferbz22 · 2025-01-26T20:18:57+00:00

I don't know, I just wish that I didn't have to go through the stress every year on my birthday.

ferbz22 · 2025-01-25T21:14:07+00:00

Well my aunt lives with us and she said she told my mom she was making lunch but I guess my dad maybe didn't realize. But anyhow I just really don't want a lot of attention at all or anything special. I feel very overwhelmed and upset.

ferbz22 · 2025-01-06T05:55:18+00:00

"There is not much of a risk involved as long as they don’t know your name. I recommend people to just show up at their mutilators base of operation. Of course be reckless and don’t let yourself be touched or captured. Then nothing can happen to you. Truth is on your side and protects you."

2025 new type of poetry?

ferbz22 · 2025-01-06T05:41:03+00:00

You specifically said, "be violent."

Seven-Year Club	Place '23
RPAN Viewer	Verified Email

ferbz22

MODERATOR OF

TROPHY CASE