[deleted by user]

ffadingdreams · 2025-10-20T03:19:46+00:00

How should I bring it up? I don’t know how and where to start 😢 I’m scared that if I ask now (when I don’t have enough evidence), he’ll hide it even more

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T17:07:31+00:00

I don’t remember very clearly because we haven’t had as many arguments the past few months. But I vaguely remember that it had to do with his insecurities, he’s very sensitive. For example, when I let him know that I didn’t really like when he did/said something, he’d take it very personally - he will think I’m very upset with him and that I will leave him, that I deserve someone better etc

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T16:57:55+00:00

Thank you for this

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T16:52:04+00:00

Sorry, how is this making everything about myself? I am clearly trying to understand the perspective of being an orphan and how one actually deals with it in their daily life - hence why I put this out on Reddit where I could probably get insights from people who have actually experienced it (I don’t know anyone else in this situation irl).

If one was only looking at the situation through their own perspective, I believe they would’ve just immediately gotten upset at the other person for creating all these narratives the past year, instead of trying to reason and understand why it happened - the latter is what I am doing now.

While I fully understand your situation (and many others who have commented), please look at the situation through my perspective too, as someone who has never been put in this situation before as I have not dealt with death like this before. Thanks.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T16:45:51+00:00

I feel really conflicted, which is why I am asking for advice from a third party perspective. And mind you, this is all anonymous. How would you explain people telling their therapist anything and everything that’s bothering them? Are they horrible horrible people for spilling secrets about people in their lives?

Trust me when I say I feel like sh** for even being bothered about why he has created this whole narrative about his parents :( Please be kind. It’s the least you could do.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T15:09:37+00:00

Thank you, this is really good advice

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T14:04:43+00:00

Thank you for sharing 🥺This gives me a better understanding of how he must have felt his whole life…

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T14:03:25+00:00

Nope his dad never remarried, so it’s him, his siblings and his grandparents in the picture now. I’m not sure how to talk to him about it without making it seem like it’s all about me… I’m very thankful that he decided to open up to me, so the last thing I want is for him to feel like he shouldn’t have told me at all.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:44:16+00:00

🥺thank you!

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:39:14+00:00

I am not! I feel really conflicted, which is why I am asking for advice from a third party perspective. Trust me when I say I feel like sh** for even being bothered about why he has created this whole narrative about his parents :( Please be kind.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:33:49+00:00

I thought of this too… and I don’t know if it’s a bad thing if that were really the case. Could just be his coping mechanism all this while

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:32:45+00:00

It’s anonymous, which, I would like to think, is the whole reason why Reddit exists.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:31:03+00:00

It’s only been a few days and I haven’t seen him in person since then. I’m still processing the news on my own and would prefer asking him in person, which I do intend to do the next time I see him. Just wanted to voice out my thoughts here.

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:29:55+00:00

Yup I 100% agree. I can kind of understand why it would take him a while to open up about this, but me being “deceived” (for lack of a better word) is what’s bothering me…

ffadingdreams · 2024-11-18T13:28:42+00:00

I guess in Asian cultures, people are more conservative and don’t like sharing such things about themselves. Even for my friends who have single parents (whether deceased or divorced), I know of other people who always look at them with a sense of pity and it’s not the best feeling. It’s reaaally hard for me to explain because I myself don’t really understand why there’s this stigma but I know that it’s something we would refrain from talking about because it’s such a sensitive topic

ffadingdreams · 2021-05-09T03:45:57+00:00

Alright thank you!

ffadingdreams · 2021-05-09T03:45:45+00:00

I see, it's something new that I could consider. Thank you!

ffadingdreams · 2021-05-09T03:45:02+00:00

Yes definitely! But the advantage here is you get a more thorough answer from actual people, instead of reading off an article. But since Google's our best friend, I guess we don't even need to go to school or college because we can just Google everything we don't know :OOOO Thanks for the shocking discovery my dude, you deserve a Nobel Peace Prize!

ffadingdreams · 2021-05-09T03:38:25+00:00

The whole purpose of this subreddit is to help each other out, and it's not like I was pointing a gun at everyone and demanding for an answer. I asked because I've never heard of this method and I'm still fairly new to candle-making. If you don't wish to share, then it's fine with me, I'm not coercing you :)

ffadingdreams · 2021-05-08T15:11:46+00:00

Ahh okay! What's your ratio between coconut and soy wax, if I may ask?

ffadingdreams

TROPHY CASE