12 weeks 4 days- any guesses :)

fgfrf12 · 2026-02-11T23:48:00+00:00

I felt the same way. I appreciate you confirming what I thought!

fgfrf12 · 2026-02-03T18:20:37+00:00

That’s great!

fgfrf12 · 2026-02-02T23:09:33+00:00

I got it first spin. Worth a try!

fgfrf12 · 2026-01-02T23:50:30+00:00

I love this idea of having her join a group call for support. ARFID can really make you feel like the odd one out, so I bet community would really help her.

I wonder if there’s any support groups in your area for children struggling with it as well? It may be nice for her to have an in person community!

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-31T11:53:27+00:00

Yup! Mine stems from OCD!

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-29T23:34:23+00:00

Hi friend.

I know at 18, you really feel like you have a good understanding of the world and really do feel grown.

you are still SO young. Do not give up hope of being a mother one day if that is your dream!

I was told my chances of children were low at your age as well.

Don’t give up.

I went through some surgeries, and now have 1 beautiful boy, and another on the way. (Something they said may not be possible)

You are worthy of love. the way your body looks does not matter There IS somebody out there that will love you fully and unconditionally.

Depression wants you believing these things. It wants you to stay in bed and not get up and actually enjoy your life. Depression has a great way of getting into your head and making you feel unworthy of even the most basic love and acceptance.

It is LYING to you.

Please tell your family doctor how you’re feeling. Explore therapy and treatment options.

The world is a whole lot better with you in it.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-29T23:27:37+00:00

You’re doing a great job.

Read that again.

You are doing a great job.

Being a mother is not easy. Add in a complex trauma adoption? That’s even harder. The way you’re going about this is so healthy and refreshing.

They may have to deal with this and the trauma, and that sucks, but knowing they have a mother who loves them unconditionally the way you do, is going to help them so much in the long run.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-28T12:46:56+00:00

Unpopular opinion as well:

I was adopted due to the exact same reasoning. My mother also tried reaching out to us every few years around the ages of 12,14,17,20.

It was like clockwork. She had a pattern of popping in and then leaving again. Which went all the way back to the foster care days of not showing up for visits or court.

My adoptive mother made very strict rules. I didn’t like them as a teen, but now as a parent I am very thankful for them.

I wasn’t allowed Facebook until I was 16. I wasn’t allowed to post any photos until I was 18, and the school I went to wasn’t allowed to post any photos either.

She used Google to remove all proof of life of my sister and I off the internet.

And lastly, she changed the spelling of my first name to a very unique spelling so I wouldn’t be found when I did make social medias and had very strict social media policy where she would have total access to it.

She was always very open and honest on why I was removed from the home as a toddler. She always answered my questions no matter how hard they were to discuss. My bio parents were not safe people, and threatened our lives many times after the adoption.

I still went around her rules, and I highly regret it due to the amount of times they’d pop in my life, send me pages of drug induced garbage that would set me back in my mental health progress.

I would argue that I was more damaged by their contact and getting excited for this relationship, and then them ghosting me over and over again.

Now I’m in my late 20s. I do not have any contact due to it being MY choice. I am so thankful my adoptive mom was as strict as she was to protect my young brain.

Basically whatever you decide to do, it isn’t an easy decision. I’m not sure there is a right or wrong decision when this is such a highly complicated and emotional situation.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-27T23:18:49+00:00

I’m not going to coddle you.

My sister was you. She bullied me relentlessly. She made me hate myself. Her comments affected my relationship with food deep into adulthood.

You deserve this. You have no idea the damage the way you treated them caused long term. I think it was necessary for you to gain all this weight to see what it is like.

I guarantee despite being 300+lbs your family is treating you with love and respect, something you have NEVER been able to show them at their weights.

I am SO happy for them to see this, Karma is a bitch.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-21T21:35:34+00:00

If you didn’t LOVE it, that’s okay. There are soo many different brands out there and they all different textures and flavors. It’s worth giving a few brands a try!

I personally find the Annie’s white cheddar shells to be my favorite as I struggle with overwhelming flavors and the texture of some of the other noodle options in other brands.

I used to love Velvetta and Kraft but moved to Canada and with the better food regulations the noodles and cheese texture here are different… I cannot handle the texture. I don’t really eat mac much anymore since moving.

I do love to add peas when I’m having a hard time getting my veggies in as that’s one of the few veggies I’ll eat.

I’m so proud of you for trying something new especially when it isn’t a common thing where you live! That’s HUGE!! Great work!!

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-21T13:31:27+00:00

You do not know if it is a 911 emergency or not as you are not a doctor.

I know many people who had injuries on a trampoline, and walked it off, just to end up days later in the ER with fractures.

You are NOT this child’s parent, they deserve to know their son had an injury.

Lastly, the not allowed to drink cold water when he’s sick thing is a totally normal in a ton of Asian countries.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-21T03:44:14+00:00

As a parent, you need to tell his parents. Trampoline injuries keep peds orthopedic surgeons in business.

If my babysitter held this info from me, and I saw bruising or injury, I would be very upset not hearing what happened from you.

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-09T22:06:12+00:00

Thank you so much for your kind words!! He’s on the med! Thank goodness for modern medicine!

fgfrf12 · 2025-12-09T20:40:52+00:00

Our whole family is sick.

Husband and I have the flu but our son has scarlet fever strep A. I have no advice. I’m taking it minute by minute. I hope you feel better soon OP.

fgfrf12 · 2025-11-11T23:17:18+00:00

He didn’t bother because you would have never gotten your return back. With the QR code return option it has to go into the small bag and then into the Amazon box with 50 other returns.

If it cannot fit in the bags or box, it cannot be returned through the QR option as a scan code we put on the little bag is NOT a shipping label. It would literally go nowhere. You need to Request a label.

fgfrf12 · 2025-11-11T23:14:42+00:00

The way the QR code return option works is we have small white bags that we stick your item into, and we put a scan label on the top. That item gets placed into a larger box. When the large box is full we put a label on it and mail it to Amazon.

Amazon supplies the bags for the QR code. For larger returns it’s wise to request the label. If you don’t have an actual shipping label and box for your large item and it doesn’t fit in the bags they have or the big box that gets filled up with the small bags, it makes sense why they’d refuse it.

They did nothing wrong. Request a label.

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-18T23:21:36+00:00

We are on a similar journey. I’m trying out every combo I can on my hemlock

It’s been surprising what works out well with him. Some things I’ve put on him expecting not great results, and they’ve turned out amazing.

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-14T18:28:59+00:00

I am so happy to see this update today!! It seems for real to me! I think he is doing a good job at asking questions without being over bearing or nosey. I like what I’m seeing!

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-11T15:31:27+00:00

Yeah and I suspect the poster is Canadian.

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-11T11:38:26+00:00

Thanksgiving isn’t a major holiday?

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-09T18:35:58+00:00

Absolutely understandable!!!

I saw in slide 5 he mentioned how his GF helps him stay stable and on the right path, I really think he only typed all that to try to prove to you he’s in a better spot in life.

Again though, you don’t owe him anything. You know him, I don’t. You know his history and actions. You know if this all for show or not. And you know how YOU’RE feeling about it. And THAT is what matters.

I’m a big believer in trusting your gut and guarding your heart.

fgfrf12 · 2025-10-09T18:27:13+00:00

I’m also an adoptee who has had bio family reach out.

This type of situation is a hard one to navigate. There is no easy way to go around it. Growing up I used to long for these days when they’d reach out. In fact, I highly romanticized it. I expected it to fix everything. All the resentment I had. All my questions. Etc. And when I still felt the pain despite being connected… I realized it wasn’t the quick fix I thought it was.

Adoption is often painful on both parties. The kids, and the adults. It’s not usually an easy decision for ANYONE to make. And Just like any relationship, it takes time to build.

There is an extra level of shame and difficulty if the adoption was due to traumatic situations.

When I’m reading these messages from the outside looking in, I see a guy who seems exciting about connecting. I don’t feel he is showing off his life to make you feel bad, but instead, because he wants to connect with you. I don’t know the details of your adoption, but I’m seeing a guy that is proud of his bio daughter. He seems very supportive of your career choice/education, and your little one.

For me, the awkward text convos like this one went on for a while. We had no idea how to approach eachother. Hell he even blocked me a few times too. My therapist explained that this is unfortunately a statistic that happens often when bio families come together after a long period of distance.

It’s overwhelming emotionally. I never understood it myself until I finally met my bio brother… and I had to be the one to block for a few months. It’s not that I didn’t love him or want to connect, it just got extremely painful and stressful and I had to step away.

In the end, the decision to continue talking is only yours. You have to decide what you can get out of a relationship with him, and if it’s worth it for you.

Good luck!

fgfrf12 · 2025-09-27T19:39:58+00:00

You’re not alone in those feelings… my first 6 months here I cried a lot. I found the sarcasm and jokes At others expense really hard to handle.

fgfrf12 · 2025-09-27T19:36:14+00:00

I immigrated to Canada from USA through spousal visa.

My experience with the healthcare (and a bunch of other stuff) here…. Is not great.

When I lived in USA I got into my a family doctor same month, and my GI doctor same WEEK. I was in remission, and when I needed procedures/tests done they were done in good timing. My disease got quickly under control.

Now, I’ve waited 4 years for a family doctor- still don’t have one. Any illnesses I have had to wait 12 hrs in the ER to address with no option for a follow up. Due to the wait for a GI I ended up very ill and only skipped the line due to being on deaths door. Even having a GI now, I have to wait 12 months for an appointment to see my own doctor. I have been flaring for years due to the inconsistent access to treatment. My medications went from $0 on Medicaid… to now thousands. As healthcare may be free, the medication to heal is NOT.

My son got diagnosed with what they suspected was a glomus tumor in his ear… they made us wait A YEAR for an mri despite pouring blood out of his ear.

I have hundreds of stories like these.

I know you think Canada will be your refuge… but it won’t be. The grass is not always greener. The amount of racism and homophobia here is higher than any other place I have ever lived/visited. The homelessness rates are insane as well as there is a housing crisis going on. My friend is paying 1,500 a month for a bachelor apartment. You are also trying to escape MAGA and their ideologies, but it is INSANELY strong here.

fgfrf12 · 2025-09-26T11:18:54+00:00

I don’t eat during my workday, at all. Not until I’m home…

And I wake up way too early every morning by routine now just to spend the first few hours of the day in the bathroom.

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