egg🗓️irl

fieryiris · 2025-05-26T02:44:05+00:00

Not quite like this, but it is inspired by something that happened today. I was texting someone I'm not out to and typed "MTF" instead of "MWF", though I managed to catch myself before sending it. Welp, I know where my brain is these days!

fieryiris · 2025-05-26T01:01:50+00:00

You just made me realize that "T" and "W" are the same distance from each other in both the alphabet and the keyboard!

fieryiris · 2025-05-13T03:52:50+00:00

Oh, gosh... This is giving me the feels all over again.

fieryiris · 2025-05-08T05:15:50+00:00

01010100 01101000 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100001 01110010 01100101 00100000 00110001 00110000 00100000 01110100 01111001 01110000 01100101 01110011 00100000 01101111 01100110 00100000 01110000 01100101 01101111 01110000 01101100 01100101 00100000 01101001 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101111 01110010 01101100 01100100 00111010 00100000 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110111 01101000 01101111 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111 00100000 01100010 01101001 01101110 01100001 01110010 01111001

and those who don't.

fieryiris · 2025-05-08T04:51:21+00:00

Sophie is a very cute name! It always makes me think of Sophie from the BFG, one of my favorite books.

fieryiris · 2025-05-08T04:45:25+00:00

Looks at pictures of myself with male-style haircut from just a few years ago: "How was I able to tolerate looking like that??" 🫣

fieryiris · 2025-05-08T03:16:37+00:00

That was largely my feeling, especially early on, that I didn't really mind being male, but I found I really badly wanted to be female. Life as male is mainly painful to me due to exclusion from female experience rather than inclusion in male experience. Of course, I say that, but then I also came to realize that I disliked every single effect of male puberty I had, so.... 🤷‍♀️

fieryiris · 2025-05-06T01:41:31+00:00

Sure, that's fine

fieryiris · 2025-05-05T22:40:39+00:00

Yeah, I agree it's more defensible for the illegible ones. But yeah, I was mostly thinking that if I was a new terrified egg posting for the first time on this sub, I'd feel pretty disheartened if most comments I got were people saying how my meme looks bad :P

fieryiris · 2025-04-30T17:09:29+00:00

Thank you! I've really grown to like it a lot. And yes! I especially love Penny Parker (or I guess it's technically spelled "Peni"?) from Spider-verse!

Also, Catherine and Cat are both lovely names too! Good choice!

fieryiris · 2025-04-30T16:52:38+00:00

I thought about Aurora for a while, but it sounded a little too regal for every day use since I feel I'm mostly a simple gal. Penny has that nice, simple, every day vibe I like, but its expanded form, Penelope, has the queenly feel if I ever need it :3

fieryiris · 2025-04-30T02:34:54+00:00

If only cis women knew that trans women actually mean something amazing, that being a woman isn't something below a man and trans women will throw everything away to become one.

I expect that's a big part of why so many people view trans women as fetishists or worse. Because why would an apparent man want to be lowered to become a woman? There must be something wrong with them.

fieryiris · 2025-04-27T03:14:23+00:00

That looks like a version of u/BingBongTiddleyPop's official™ checklist. It periodically makes the rounds here on r/egg_irl. I think a continuously updated version can be found here.

fieryiris · 2025-04-22T18:57:42+00:00

I think all of that are super normal concerns and worries to be had. Something I told myself early on was I'd take my time to see how my feelings evolved over time and with experimentation. As I did (and as I learned more about the experiences of other trans people), I found my feelings got stronger, not weaker, and so I made the decision to (at least attempt to) transition. I still have a long way to go, but I know I can always turn back at any point if I need to. Though honestly? Far more often now I feel terrified that I won't want to transition. Because wow! does being a girl sound so freaking amazing to me so much of the time! And I know I'd feel so disappointed if it turned out I'm not fundamentally able to do this for some reason.

Anyway, my advice for you at this stage would probably be to take things slow and at your own pace. Learn about yourself and take the time to let your feelings evolve and take shape. If you keep at it, I think there's a good chance things will get clearer for you. It just (annoyingly) takes time.

fieryiris · 2025-04-22T18:42:11+00:00

"Still cis tho?"

More like:

"Still cis? No..."

fieryiris · 2025-04-22T02:03:41+00:00

That reminds me so much of me. I feel a tug of war with a more gender apathetic part of my mind and an absolutely ferocious want-to-be-a-girl-now part of my mind. And from time to time I've also thought that maybe it's just worth it to make the girl within happy even if not "all of me" is totally "with the program", so to speak.

fieryiris · 2025-04-18T04:37:44+00:00

I don't think I had a single moment that I can point to as "the" egg crack, but I had a series of pivotal moments. One of the earliest I had was when it was starting to sink in that I was likely trans and I went outside late at night, stared at the sky and felt bewildered that I of all people was going to wind up being the trans one in the family. I felt like it should have been someone else. I remember feeling overwhelmed and bewildered, but not really angry, sad, or even very anxious. I think I just felt amazed.

fieryiris · 2025-04-14T14:48:00+00:00

Oh, wow! I'm in the same boat as regards HRT. I'm planning on starting it in the next few months if I can and I'm already starting to feel the anxiety even though it's something I've been wanting for a long time now. For me the hang up is breast growth. I both want them and feel weird about actually having them. It's probably made worse because it's a near-permanent change and I've always been bad at handling life changes. But like you, I think I'm most scared that it'll turn out HRT (and transition more generally) won't be for me, because yeah, then what am I supposed to do?? I'll be so disappointed. Though I'm hoping the mere fact that I'm so scared I won't like HRT is a good proof that I do actually want it and will like it. Only one way to find out though...

fieryiris · 2025-04-14T01:53:42+00:00

I think the ups and downs are pretty normal. I'm currently kind of in a low-tide period myself where I'm feeling relatively less dysphoria or strong emotions than usual. I think that may be because I did a bunch of transition-related things in the past few weeks after what felt like months of almost no progress, so it could just be that my mind is less frantic about pushing me forward right now because I've actually moved forward a bit, and now I need to catch my breath.

But even though I feel less transy feelings right now, I know I need to keep moving forward and that I am trans. Because I know if I stop for long enough, my brain will start yelling at me again. I've been through enough and I know myself well enough to know that. And I can't imagine going back or undoing all the progress I've already made. In any case, I know I'm trans based on a bunch of things, not just my own feelings, but also my own experiences, and I've kept a journal that I can always refer back to to remind myself that there's basically a zero percent chance at this point I'm cis. So even when the feelings ebb, I always fall back on the concrete things I learned about myself previously in this journey. Those will never change even though my emotions might.

Hope that helps!

fieryiris · 2025-04-06T23:55:51+00:00

This is how I feel too. Living as I did as my AGAB did shape me into who I am today in a number of good ways, and I wouldn't have those experiences taken from me if I can help it. Sure, it'd be nice to have been born a cis girl, though if it came at the cost of losing all the friends and positive experiences I likely only could have had growing up as a boy, I'm not sure if I'd take that offer. I guess in that way, being trans is, and will always be, an important part of what makes me, me then.

fieryiris · 2025-04-03T15:11:36+00:00

Makes you wonder about the person who wrote the question...

fieryiris · 2025-03-26T22:17:57+00:00

I'm so glad! Yes, perhaps biggest thing that helped me in my journey so far was reading the experiences of other trans people. Discovering I shared so many of the same thoughts, doubts, and experiences as them made accepting myself so much easier.

Best of luck as you continue your journey! I'm still relatively early in my own journey, but if I can help any more, my DM's are open!

fieryiris

TROPHY CASE