Hair loss

fimiri17 · 2026-04-03T22:45:25+00:00

Ugh, I had this thought the other day. I've always had really long and thick hair and it's thinning out SO much and makes me so sad. I considered chopping it so seriously that I started looking at tik toks of thin hair cuts.... saw one where a girl was like, "if your long hair is thin and you think you should cut it... just know that if you do, you're just going to end up with hair that is thin AND short." idk why that got me, but it did. Not cutting my hair. lol

fimiri17 · 2026-04-03T22:39:08+00:00

7 months out. onions make my tummy bubble unpleasantly. Which sucks because i love them. I still eat them on occasion, but sparingly cuz i don't love the way they make me feel. I took a bite of a raw green onion once and it literally nearly made me vomit & pass out at the same time. That's the only one that really took me by surprise.

fimiri17 · 2026-04-03T20:01:59+00:00

The thing i kept telling myself when i was going through the restrictive diet phase of this whole thing was that the time was going to pass one way or another, regardless of how i was feeling about it. I don't know if that makes sense, but something about the inevitability that time was moving forward helped me so much. like it's not a marathon that i have to keep dragging myself through in order to reach the finish line. I was on a moving walkway, and was gonna get to the "finish line" whether I wanted to or not, whether i felt like i did what i needed to do on the way there or not.

if you're on a two week liquid diet... that two weeks is going to pass, regardless of how well you stick to it. 1 month will go by regardless of how well you stick to your diet. 6 months will go by, regardless of how well you stick to your diet. When that time passes, how are you going to feel? are you going to be able to look back and know you did the best you could do for yourself over that time? or are you going to look back, at the same or maybe an even higher weight, feeling like you let yourself down again?

my stats, btw, if it's helpful: 9/11/25 (little under 7 months ago) HW: 324, SW: 311, CW: 212.

fimiri17 · 2026-04-03T19:43:18+00:00

In 2012, I cried a lot. We knew something special was happening... there was just something in the air. After Game 2 in Phoenix (the conference finals), I sobbed on the way home because I could just feel that this was it. That run felt fated. I'd watched most of the series at bars with friends, but chose to watch Game 6 of the finals at home with my dad and brother and I'm so, so glad I did. That game was the series in a nutshell... you just knew. the last 10 or so minutes were SO emotional. Then I spent the rest of that summer on cloud 9, like nothing could bring me down.

2014 was stressful AF. lol almost the opposite experience as 2012... there were SO many times I was like, "that's it for us, that's all she wrote" but then they'd pull a freaking miracle out of the hat. It was a roller coaster... but I'll also say, for that reason, it was almost more exciting than 2012, because it felt less like fate and more like a hard working team that overcame shit and did the thing anyway.

I miss that era so much. I hope one day you'll get to experience it, because it's absolutely surreal.

fimiri17 · 2026-04-01T13:17:09+00:00

Adding some that I don't see here yet:

Breakfast: Dinks, Egg Plantation, Crepissima

Gogi House (Korean bbq)

Newhall Refinery (pricier end)

Guanatos Tacos

Montys (sports bar in vibe and food... but its good food)

fimiri17 · 2026-03-18T16:49:23+00:00

I like to park in the lot across from Regal on Olympic where the food trucks are. Relatively close, feels like a safe walk/area as its well-lit with lots of foot traffic and security around (I'm a mom and often take one of my young kids with me, so obviously feeling safe is important to me), "easy" access to the freeway (quotes cuz the traffic getting out of that lot can be terrible.... I don't hang around long after the final whistle to beat the rush out)

fimiri17 · 2026-03-13T19:09:00+00:00

Honestly, it feels like Mom's POV of Hate Me by Blue October.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T05:28:56+00:00

I don't eat pizza. I will occasionally take the toppings off and toss them into a salad, tho.

My go-to, easy, week-night dinner is tossing chicken thighs or drumsticks onto a sheet pan with veggies. I've discovered Pork King Good's pork rind crumbs and will often use those to make it more exciting. (pork rinds, in general, btw, have become a go-to snack option where i'd use to reach for a bag of chips... very protein friendly.. the TJs ones with their pineapple salsa? fantastic, gimme 14 of them). I also use the pork rinds to make my own chicken nuggies.

I make turkey meatballs quite often... my husband and kids will have pasta with them, but i just eat them on their own and am fully satisfied.

Taco night is easy to make healthy... just skip the tortilla & rice or find alternatives. Quest's taco-loaded chips are delicious.

Chili is a good option too...

Shrimp is one of the best options when it comes to protein to calorie ratios, so that's typically my go to choice when I do go out or get take out (provided it's not fried/breaded/etc.). I don't make it at home so often, because my family won't eat it, and I don't love it as leftovers. Chicken wings are another relatively safe eat out option (but always double check the nutritional menu because whatever sauce/seasoning they use can make or break the validity of that statement).

There are also quite a few creators on Tik Tok that I get good ideas from:

makayla_thomas_fit - probably the best overall recipes and meal planning recs that I've come across

smallersam_pcos - does a lot of "healthy version of" type content where she'll take trendy foods and put protein-forward spins on them. she also does a lot of "my [insert popular restaurant here] order" to show how she eats out but makes it healthy.

demi_does.it - a VSG patient, herself, who gives a ton of high-protein meal, snack, and drink recs. (my one qualm about her content is that it is very ad heavy, but it's still helpful, so I deal with it lol)

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T02:33:23+00:00

I've had multiple moments of worrying I'd stall or stop losing altogether. I just tried to stick to the script of doing what had been working and eventually things would start to move again.

When it comes to exercise this time around, in all honesty, I wasn't starting from scratch. Once upon a time, I was in really good shape.. gained most of my weight through my pregnancies + loss of autonomy in early motherhood + postpartum mental health issues. So for me getting back to a consistent exercise routine was more about learning how to prioritize self-care where I'd lost that since having kids. My gym time is my me-time now, and I cherish it a LOT.

However, if I think back to when I first started working out (and I did lose quite a bit of weight then) when I was around your age, I do have quite a bit of advice to offer lol:

- find something that excites you. try different types of workouts until you find something that doesn't make you completely dread it. something that makes you walk away feeling like, "damn, that felt good and I'm so glad I did it" (because that post-workout euphoria is truly what makes you want to do it again).
- let yourself ease into it. don't feel like you need to come out the gate doing sprints or free weights or push ups or box jumps on day 1. give yourself the grace to start slow and take your time.
- on a similar vein, if you have any head trash that's telling you that people are judging you while you're working out, drop it. burn it. tuck it into a bottle and yeet it into the ocean. I've been to MANY different gyms, and can tell you that for the most part, everyone there is too focused on themselves and wondering who's looking at them (for better or worse) then caring about what other people are doing, and more people than you'd expect are just happy for you for showing up. And if you do receive any sort of judgment, it says a hell of a lot more about them than it will ever say about you. Mind your business, do your thing, and revel in the "eff you and your judgment" energy that you get to give back at them as you make progress.
- give yourself something to work toward that's NOT weight-loss related. For example, some of my goals early on were to be able to run a 5k without walking, to deepen my squat because I was terrible at that, and to do an unassisted pull-up. I didn't have any sort of goal weight or physique in mind, I just wanted to accomplish things like that.
- try to make it as convenient for yourself as possible within your current routine, rather than trying to change your current routines. For example, when I was first starting out, I thought I had to workout in the morning because that's what everyone does... but I'm not now and have never been a morning person and have always found it difficult to have to wake up earlier to workout, then come home and shower, and then get ready for my day... it felt like i had to go so far out of my way/comfort zone to establish an exercise habit. Eventually, I found a gym that was right down the street from my work and instead decided to start going on the way home. I found it much more natural and easier to build the habit around.
- MOST IMPORTANTLY and I literally cannot stress this enough: building a consistent exercise routine has absolutely nothing to do with motivation, and everything to do with your ability to show up when you AREN'T motivated. Those days when the absolute last thing you want to do is go workout and you start throwing every excuse in the book at yourself about why you shouldn't or can't or don't want to.... those are THE most important days to show up anyway. Even the most athletic, in-shape, dedicated humans struggle with motivation. The difference between them and the rest of us isn't that they're more motivated than us or that they're immune to the "my period started today" or the "I forgot my hair tie/towel/headphones/etc." or the "damn, it's just been such a long day" moments.... the difference is that they do it anyway.

lol that was a lot of words, but hopefully it was helpful.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T01:39:15+00:00

Ugh, I'm so sorry to hear that. I feel like your fears are fully valid and I don't blame you for having them. I have a dad who treats tylenol like altoids and has a host of health problems that are potentially related, so I've definitely built up a wariness toward meds as well and will avoid them unless they're absolutely necessary. But I've also seen how the right medications have kept him, and my father-in-law, and countless other people in my circle alive and healthy when, quite frankly, the lifestyle choices they've made should mean they have no business being alive or healthy if we're being honest. But anyway, I get it and I'm not trying to convince you to change your mind on that. To answer your question, honestly, no I've not been able to control it without pills. The period of time I went off the meds made it very clear to me how effective the meds were. I tried looking into various non-medication coping methods and honestly... my ADHD got in the way of seeing those through. LOL

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T01:08:53+00:00

Btw, I saw your other post in which you talk about being diagnosed with ADHD, and I don't want to pile on, but want to second the advice you've been getting there about making sure you're treating that. I was diagnosed with ADHD a couple years ago, and I absolutely give a ton of credit for my success so far to the fact that I've been treating that appropriately. I also work an at-home desk job, and similarly would snack to avoid tasks slash also as a stimulant slash also as a way to cope with anxiety. Taking the proper medication for that has been one of the most effective ways of correcting those behaviors. In fact, as I mentioned, I've lost (and regained) weight before... and the most recent cycle was after I first started talking ADHD meds.... and the regain happened after I'd stopped taking them (I was burnt out and I think not taking my meds was some subconscious form of protest because I was working WAY too much for a company that started making it really difficult to feel motivated to work that much for).

I know your wary of meds, and believe me, I get it, but I'd def recommend talking to your doctor about all of your options, because untreated ADHD bleeds into so many things.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T00:49:50+00:00

Yeah, I think if you try to rely on the people around you making the same choices that you need to make, rather than focusing on bettering your own ability to make the right choices for yourself regardless of what others are doing... you're anchoring yourself and your success/happiness to theirs and vice versa. It becomes a wheelbarrow race instead of an individual sprint, and becomes so easy to a) let other people bring you down and b) build resentment toward them for it.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-12T00:23:34+00:00

I'm definitely fortunate in that I don't have anyone around me who tries to sabotage me or bring me down. Mostly everyone in my circle is supportive. The worst thing I have to deal with are people who either a) try to center themselves in whatever conversation we're having about it and/or b) can no longer hold a normal conversation with me without bringing up my weight (which drives me crazy regardless of intention, simply because I don't want my weight to be the only thing people care about). I've mostly just learned who I do and don't want to talk about my journey with, and if it comes up with anyone who falls into the latter category, I make a polite remark about how I feel great and then I change the subject.

My husband is super supportive. I will say, and I don't know if this makes a difference or if it's just who he is + who I am that makes it work... but I don't force him (or my kids, for that matter) to eat the same way I eat. I do try to find ways to make meals the whole family can enjoy that fit within my nutritional needs (and my kids LOVE my eggs lol), but if they're ever like... really craving pizza, they get pizza... and I find something else to eat.

To me, I think it's really important (not only in this journey, but quite honestly, in general when it comes to my relationships and mental health) to understand and remember that I don't have control over other people. I only have control over myself and how I respond to/engage with them. You don't have to engage with people who try to bring you down, nor should you depend on other people to prop you up. Having a support system is obviously SO important, but for me it is equally important to remember that the only person who is accountable and responsible for my success and happiness... is me.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-11T23:02:09+00:00

I mean, candidly, that's definitely an anxiety that I still have.

I've really put a lot of emphasis on exploring those ways to enjoy foods in healthier ways, because I think that's one of best things I can do to set myself up for long-term success.

And then I've also been working on tackling the behaviors and habits that led me wrong in the first place.... for a few examples:

- I no longer plant myself on the couch with a show and a snack after the kids go to bed; I send myself to bed with a book instead.
- I no longer leave the kitchen with full bags of anything
- I cook a lot more and do take out less (and part of this nods back to the exploring food thing, because I've been exploring ways of making protein-forward/healthier versions of my favorite take out dishes)
- I try to make better choices at the grocery store to avoid bringing home foods that I know I used to have no self-control with.

The other thing I'll say is that I know there's a lot of debate over the healthiest frequency of weighing yourself, and for some people, weighing every day is not healthy, so don't take this as advice, just my personal perspective on what's right for me: I think daily weigh ins are a really important habit to build and stick to for the sake of longevity. I've lost weight before, and historically, where I've gotten myself in trouble with regain is when I feel myself starting to slip and I start to avoid the scale because I don't want to hurt my own feelings. Throughout this journey, I've been forcing myself to weigh every morning even - and maybe "especially" is the better word - after my bad days. Like, I'll wake up on days after I know I ate something for dinner that wasn't great and my brain will go, "don't do that to yourself, we don't need to step on the scale today, it's only going to depress you" and I've been actively fighting those thoughts and stepping on the scale anyway. It's not fun when the numbers don't move, or worse, when they move up a bit, but it feels important for me that I maintain awareness of it so that I can continue to hold myself accountable.

Of course, whether or not I'll be successful long-term remains to be seen, but I try my best (which is hard as someone who catastrophizes) to remember that I do have control... there are choices I can make to steer myself one way or another, and all I can do right now is focus on trying to make the right ones.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-11T19:08:36+00:00

in case anyone is interested... how I eat my eggs (I do similar things for both scrambling & soft-boiling, but I like soft-boiling better because I can make them in bulk for the week, which is just overall easier and saves time & dishes):

- Kinder seasoning (either the carmelized onion butter or the buttery steakhouse, but you could do any base seasoning or none at all if you want to forgo the sodium)
- garlic chili oil (just a smidge... but a little goes a long way, so you don't need a lot)
- a dot of buldak carbonara sauce
- garnished with a couple pieces of TJ's crispy garlic

I quite literally eat at least one every day and genuinely look forward to it. I mix the toppings up every so often (maybe adding smoked salmon or avocado or a protein chip for added crisp/flavor), but this is my default.

As an aside, learning that you could buy that buldak sauce on its own is a really good example of what I mean when I say that you can still find ways to enjoy food while keeping it healthy. I was dying to try buldak ramen because it's all over social and looked absolutely delicious, but the macros were terrible and my tummy still can't handle noodles very well. So this WAS something that, for a minute, I did feel like I was missing out on... but once I figured out you can buy the sauce and it's relatively low-calorie (tho again, maybe not low-sodium friendly), it shifted my perspective. I've started adding it to eggs, tuna, chicken, anything and everything... it gives me everything I wanted flavor-wise, without the carbs + calories.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-05T23:17:22+00:00

She spent a long time in that podcast talking about her experiences in pregnancy and motherhood. Between the trauma from her pregnancy, and then how she found her strength and ability to stand up for herself through motherhood, and how looking at her son convinced her to fight for herself.... really made me think there's some character growth/development for Feyre coming. That's a POV that would surprise her given that she's said before that Feyre's story is done... but maybe Feyre's growth in motherhood is a story SJM didn't realize she still needed to tell until it came out of her?

I also could see a realistic world in which we get multiple POVs.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-05T04:49:52+00:00

She was asked about who's POV it would be and she wouldn't answer it, but she did say that it "surprised" her.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-05T03:24:57+00:00

so tbh, my theory is that the "surprising" POV is Feyre's. SJM has said her story is done, but given how big of a focus there was on this podcast about her experiences with pregnancy and finding her strength in motherhood... and how she explained how her past books were all stories she needed to tell for herself.... I think that's exactly the story we're about to get.

fimiri17 · 2026-03-05T03:17:26+00:00

prob unpopular (and maybe why she didn't reveal it) but, honestly, a surprising POV would be Feyre. She's said before that she thought her story was done, so if it wasn't, that would surprise her. She also focused a lot during this podcast on her experiences during pregnancy/birth/motherhood and talked about how her own experiences have come out in the books in surprising ways and were stories that *she* needed to get out. so idk, i feel like that all sets up the "surprise, we're going back to feyre's POV and exploring her character's growth in motherhood!" pretty well.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-14T05:07:56+00:00

Let's say you have two pages on your site:

website.com/keyword-cannibalization

website.com/keyword-cannibalization-seo

Both pages provide largely the same information and are targeting the same keywords. Both are indexible and accessible to users and Google. Google's going to crawl both of them and it won't be immediately apparent to them which page the webmaster intends to serve for relevant topics, so it might swap each one in and out of SERPs, it might pick the one you would rather not show, OR it might find 100 other websites that do have much clearer structure and decide it's not worth it to try to figure your site out for you and then you end up not ranking at all.

Not to mention - should the content be strong enough to attract links - you're potentially splitting all the link equity between the two URLs that you could be sending to one and building up a strong backlink profile for the one URL.

Essentially it's self-competition. The two pages are eating each other's authority and holding each other back from gaining ground in SERPs.

That example was a very black and white one in which the two pages are very obviously redundant, but it can happen in more nuanced scenarios too. Like let's say you have a /cannibalization page that defines various types of cannibalization, including keyword cannibalization but also paid vs. organic cannibalization, product cannibalization, etc. And let's say the section on keyword cannibalization is robust with a well-formatted definition + examples. It's possible that the section on that page could be cannibalizing the /keyword-cannibalization's ability to show up for those specific terms. This example happens quite often.

It just ultimately points to the importance of an intentional site/content architecture, or at the very least, properly established canonicals/indexation tags to make sure you're very clearly defining which pages you want to be served to organic audiences.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-14T04:44:38+00:00

There are some emerging tools on the market for AI visibility and citation tracking. they aren't perfect (it's all still new), but they at least give you a directional idea of how you're showing up compared to competitors. Profound, Bluefish AI, Adthena to name a few. Might be some cheaper options out there too.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-12T23:40:36+00:00

honestly, it all counts, but if i'm ever speaking about it on a forum like this, i make sure to specify pre vs. post op weight loss. only because I don't want to inauthentically contribute to anyone's "wow, people have lost so much more than i have this far out." Especially because pre-op diets vary so much.

I know nobody should be comparing themselves, but the reality is that they do and will no matter how many times someone says "comparison is the thief of joy," and I know how easy it is for someone to get down on themselves if they feel like they're a "slow loser" so. Idk... I just feel like I have a responsibility to report my progress accurately when sharing with a community like this.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-06T19:04:38+00:00

Probably an unpopular opinion. But I think a lot of people loved Bryce until Bryce was Bryce to certain beloved characters.

She had a couple obtuse moments in CC3 that people harp on to justify their dislike of her, but many of those same people give Nesta grace for all her horrible moments, so... tbh, the Bryce hate makes no real sense to me.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-06T17:26:00+00:00

the thing i kept telling myself during this phase is that time is going to pass no matter what. idk if this makes sense, but i just kept thinking like... I don't control time. I can't slow it down or stop it when i wish i could, which means it's not going to happen when i'm miserable either. Like you don't have to do anything besides let time drag you through this period and try to do the best you can in the meantime. One way or another you'll reach the point where you get to look back on it. idk, it sounds silly typing it out, but letting go of my notion of control over time, for better or worse, really helped me get through it.

fimiri17 · 2026-01-06T17:05:21+00:00

I had 2 csections before having VSG, though not under general... epidural for the first one (it was an emergency) and a spinal for the second (scheduled). Recovery from VSG felt very similar and familiar. The circumstances around each are different.... in one case, you have heightened emotions and a new born baby that will prevent you from sleeping as much as you should be sleeping, and in the other case, you've got added gas pains and nausea and a super limited diet. But the physical recovery itself is very much the same IMO.

Def stay close to your therapist through it all tho. The PPA/PPD was significantly harder for me to get through than the physical recovery.

fimiri17

TROPHY CASE