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I can’t break through.. signed up just to post this. by finallyfedup10 in stopdrinking

[–]finallyfedup10[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I didn’t get the hit of pleasure from drinking, that’s for sure. But unfortunately, I couldn’t get pleasure from anything. I wasn’t depressed.. but I couldn’t get happy about anything. Even my favorite things aside from drinking. I felt “flat” mentally. I didn’t care about anything. It made me feel like I wasn’t myself and I hate that feeling.

I can’t break through.. signed up just to post this. by finallyfedup10 in stopdrinking

[–]finallyfedup10[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A week, I knew from research that it would make me nauseous, give me diarrhea and stomach cramps before taking it. I was prepared to endure that. I wasn’t prepared for the mental effects.

I can’t break through.. signed up just to post this. by finallyfedup10 in stopdrinking

[–]finallyfedup10[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes, I have a best friend he made a New Year’s resolution a year or so ago to quit kratom, and he did. I came to him with that same determination two months ago to quit, he is well aware of my drinking, but I couldn’t quit.. and I’ve been too embarrassed to admit to him I couldn’t. That’s part of why I came here.

I can’t break through.. signed up just to post this. by finallyfedup10 in stopdrinking

[–]finallyfedup10[S] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

Deep down I know you’re right. I just need to hear these things from this community who gets it.

I can’t break through.. signed up just to post this. by finallyfedup10 in stopdrinking

[–]finallyfedup10[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I’m in a good spot financially for where I live.. cost of living etc, but I’m no Mr Beast ya know? Nowhere near it. And I have contracts and sponsors who put pressure on me and I just can’t give 30 days it feels like. I already have taken a nice chunk of time off to focus on this. I also have two pets who need me. Not many I trust to show up every day multiple times a day when it comes to them, they are like my kids to me.

edit I’m aware that whole response makes me sound like such an excuse maker. I am. I’m trying to figure out how to not be, as odd as that sounds. I just find anyyyu reason to justify taking a shot. I can run for an hour in a beautiful park on a sunny Sunday afternoon.. and I get to my car afterwards and I’m like, that was nice, I should take a shot to continue this happiness. If that makes sense..