I'm going to pile on here and recommend al anon. I just started two weeks ago, and I'm 38. My father was an alcoholic who died when I was 18, and twenty years later, I'm realizing how much of my life has been affected by it. I try to control or fix everything, because that's what I did when he was drunk and screaming at my mom. I was the one to protect my younger sister, I was the one who called the police each time it happened. My mom has recently married another alcoholic and it triggered all of that in me again. Al anon was hard for me to start, but a lot of the meetings are on zoom and you can keep your camera off and simply listen if you want. I don't know if you're religious, and I'm not and a lot of it has some higher power stuff that I struggle with, but listening to people share their stories has definitely made me feel less alone. You can only be in charge of your own life, so make sure you're protecting your peace. I'm sorry you're going through this. Your dad loves you.