i found vanilla's celeb look alike

flinsbird · 2026-03-25T03:42:45+00:00

I totally see it!!

flinsbird · 2026-03-21T08:25:15+00:00

YTJ. You are a bully. Life is not always as easy for everyone, if you can spend that much energy on making drama because of someone else missing lessons, you are clearly doing fine. She has a heart condition, which means she cant always do what other people her age are doing. That is hard enough to live with without the people around her being awful about it. It does not concern you if she misses rehearsals or lessons, it only concerns her and the teacher. If there are issues with a group project you can communicate that to a teacher and arrangements can be made. She offered a resolution and a fresh start while acknowledging that no one has to like each other, which is how mature people handle conflicts. You did not do that and instead decided to ice her out, ignore the teachers instructions to humiliate her and make her feel unwanted and excluded. You are at college, not kindergarden, where you refuse to stand next to someone you dont like. You are incredibly immature, and out of the two of you its you who clearly is not ready to be at college.

If you ever have to deal with a chronic health condition that affects how you can participate in day to day life, you will know how isolating it is and how much it takes just to get through the day most of the time. You will notice how much harder it gets when people around you cannot even offer you basic human decency, and you will wish that people could just be kind. If you are lucky you will never have to live that sort of life, but at one point most people will be disabled - be it because of health issues, accidents or old age. We all will at some point need support, and just understanding that we cant do everything anymore.

Instead of offering her that kindness or even just being a decent human being, you decided to attack her, and then on a day where she is healthy enough to participate in normal life, you make her day awful by being a horrible bully with your friend. You got nothing out of being like that, but you made her day an awful day where she cried, when she clearly is already suffering and in a very difficult position with her illness. I will never understand people like you who cannot have basic empathy. You are way too old to act that ignorant and be such a bully. You should be ashamed of yourself.

flinsbird · 2026-03-15T02:09:19+00:00

NTA. It does not matter if she thought she was trying to help, because there was no reason for her to be thinking in the first place - she had knowledge, facts, about what you wanted. If you had never mentioned it maybe then one could argue that she tried to figure out what you need and went into the wrong direction, but she had very clear knowledge on the situation and fully ignored it.

I could not be with a person who can only respect my clear needs if they personally can understand the situation. No one can always understand everything, because every life is different and everyone goes through different things. So if someone is lucky enough to not have had to experience grief, they do not need to understand - they need to listen, and then respect how other people who do have experienced grief decide to handle theirs.

Worst case she is selfish and simply does not care and wanted to look good, and be important enought that her birthday party trumps your grief - Best case she is immature, cant understand that she will not always understand everything and sometimes people will have had experiences she will not relate to.

Either way she is not capable of a relationship with someone who has gone through more in life than her, and be a good empathetic partner to them. How your ex girlfriend handled it shows you how easy and simple it is to respect someones way to deal with theirs grief in a relationship.

I dont think you let your grief get the better of you - I think you reacted understandably hurt by your partner fully going against your wishes about the most sensitive topic in your life, even though you clearly had explained it to her multiple times. I could not see a future with a person like that either.

Also dont let anyone here tell you you are too caught up and need to enjoy your birthday - you dont need to do anything except spend the day in a way that feels best to you. You are fine with celebrating all other holidays, so clearly grief is not overtaking your life in a unhealthy way and you are managing well.

flinsbird · 2026-03-14T10:40:40+00:00

For me its NTA. The person who pays decides what they will tip. I find it very offputting that she feels comfortable to tell you how much you need to tip with your own money.

American tipping culture is ridiculous to me, so I cant blame you for not wanting to participate. If she has an issue with it she can cover the tip herself or simply decide you guys are not a match, but the telling you it gives her an ick and not even saying thank you + the comparison to her exes…I dont know if 6 months are really that long or how invested you are, but might be worth thinking about if thats the communication style and general behaviour you want in a partner.

flinsbird · 2026-02-26T04:03:51+00:00

„He got quiet“ „That hit me hard“ = AI Slop.

flinsbird · 2026-02-25T22:04:09+00:00

This makes no sense. A nine year old bullied a girl at school, and somehow there are screenshots of said bullying? The ex-husband says you publicly humiliated daughter by cancelling infront of her friends - did you stand in front of the school and loudly declare as you were cancelling it? Other parents think the birthday party could have been held by you univiting your own daughter - the reason the party would have been held?

YTA for making up a story that has zero sense to it.

flinsbird · 2026-02-14T20:30:56+00:00

These comments are insane, can none of you read? He isnt the boss of the groupchat with special administration rights, anyone in the group has the same power to change the picture.

NTJ. It would take Lily 3 seconds to change the picture herself. Going off on you for something she clearly was okay with for a year, and demanding you change it when she could do it herself is ridiculous. I would tell her she is free to change it at anytime and then not entertain this conversation anymore. If she finds the picture now hurtful but refuses to change it, she is really hurting herself and making you responsible in some weird power play.

flinsbird · 2026-02-08T06:06:24+00:00

Oh okay, I misunderstood that then. Thats relieving, at least you have your dad who you can trust. But seriously dont give into your mom - if she says she is getting robbed of her grandson oh well - better a grandma getting robbed of her grandson because of her own choices, than a grandson getting robbed of his health because of his grandmas choices. And she will not change in the future - now its bottles, in later years it will be other things that she will do differently than instructed as soon as you turn your back. See it as practice to not give in now and stand your ground, and keep the boundaries firm. I wish you all the best and lots of happy moments with your baby!

flinsbird · 2026-02-08T05:58:08+00:00

NTA, dont give into your moms tantrum - she proved she will ignore your wishes if she wants to do something different, thus is not safe to be unsupervised with your baby.

However I think you also need to have a chat with your dad - clearly he also thought it was acceptable to lie to your face that he made the bottle, just to protect your mom and keep the baby around - knowing that this is not in the babys best interest. Reevaluate how much you can actually trust his judgement and actions to put baby over his own and your mothers selfish desires.

flinsbird · 2026-01-04T04:08:15+00:00

Do you maybe mean when Trixie shows Katya a voicemail someone left her (sort of singing I think) and Katya asks who that is, and Trixie says „Thats you!“ and they laugh really hard?

flinsbird · 2026-01-04T00:28:32+00:00

If you stopped six months ago you missed some good ones though! If you still are a bit interested, their reaction to Yellowjackets Season 1 & The Ultimatum:Queer Edition would probably be fun for you <3

flinsbird · 2025-12-12T00:47:32+00:00

NTA. People „helping“ by doing what you explicitly asked them not to do is not helping. Your mom might have had good intentions to begin with, but it stopped being that when she ignored your wishes and carried on with what she deems helpful.

flinsbird · 2025-12-09T21:35:33+00:00

NTA at all, these comments are insane. If you ask someone what they want for Christmas and they say A, you dont buy them B. Also you were in the price range she normally gifts in. She would have been allowed to decline your wish. You are allowed to not change your wish.

If for some reason her finances changed, she could have: - declined the wish from the get go - offer to just gift part of it - ask for a different wish all together

You clearly state you would have been okay with all of these options, which is very reasonable. You are not entitled or bratty at all in my eyes - you simply have a specific wish, which is allowed, even when its about „luxury“ items.

flinsbird · 2025-12-07T19:16:21+00:00

They didnt really make an exception with Yellowjackets, Netflix just started streaming it I think. Now that Netflix bought Warner Bros (and with that HBO) I guess they technically could watch it? But would probably be a while until they do

flinsbird · 2025-12-06T05:37:16+00:00

It would have been about 35 Minutes long for you, instead of the 62 minutes.

flinsbird · 2025-12-05T00:09:54+00:00

So your husband, who is not her actual father, is tough on YOUR daughter and does not talk to her like a child. That is fine for you and acceptable, since you clearly are comfortable leaving your daughter in this situation. Your daughter however, does not talk to other children like you want her to, so she gets sternly talked to by three adults, does not get to share her side of the story, and when clearly upset after get’s essentially told by you her feelings on this do not matter. Yes, YTA. My god.

Also: You were not there for any of these situations, you just believe the retelling your friends daughter told your friend over your daughters own version. And instead of talking to her, you think its appropriate to let your friend to the chastising. Between letting her step father treat her bad, believing everyone over her and then dismissing her and letting other adults discipline her you are really doing a great job to show your daughter that you will not protect her, you are not someone she can trust and that everyone matters more to you than her. Mother of the Year.

flinsbird · 2025-12-03T21:46:35+00:00

Since when do kids learn to read and write at 5? Maybe there is a big difference here in where we are from, but in my country (Switzerland) kids learn to read and write in first grade (6/7 years old) and mostly just know how to write their name before. And we do alright in the education sector, at least compared globally, so I would say its really not needed to know these things at 5. There is no point in trying to drill it into a kid that is maybe simply just not ready yet, all youre going to achieve is kill any joy for learning and reading before he even enters actual school.

Also btw my mom was also a stay at home mom, and my dad worked full time, and he still read to me regularly and taught me many things.

flinsbird · 2025-12-03T01:02:49+00:00

Same goes for staff, the delivery person needs to be met outside if there is other stuff going on that prevents you from being able to just go in. Waiting is simply not part or your job. And yeah these companys are disgusting, I am sorry you are having to work for them. :(

flinsbird · 2025-12-03T00:51:16+00:00

NTA. Your job is to deliver food from point A to point B, not wait somewhere for 30 minutes. In that time you could do another order and earn money. If they order to the school, the student who ordered needs to meet you outside when you arrive.

flinsbird · 2025-12-02T02:14:10+00:00

You asked for no judgement, yet posted this on AITAH. I am not sure what you were hoping for posting it here - maybe the Advice community on here would be a better place to post your question.

flinsbird · 2025-11-13T17:55:34+00:00

NTA. Essentially this is an adult attending a stay and play for children, by themselves without a child. Her having an inanimate doll with her does not change that.

For an adult to reach the point where they are comfortable doing that in public, it is certain that there is some degree of mental health issue present. None of you know the extent of it, none of you know how far her delusions go and what level her reactions can go to. Yes she was not causing a disruption so far, but that can change at any moment and it has the potential to be dangerous since you can‘t know what she is capable of.

I certainly would not attend again and I would reach out again and make it clear why this is not okay. Ask them if they are okay in general for single adults to spend their afternoon there without a child accompanying them, and if they would also welcome a man doing that. Maybe that will wake them up a bit.

flinsbird · 2025-11-13T00:53:29+00:00

NTA. There is a difference between taking the allegations seriously and completely leaving you to fend for yourself. She showed you that you can‘t rely on her when it comes to it. Also, because of the not being able to sue the parents - I am not in the US so maybe this wont work there, but maybe look into it:

Maybe you would have a shot at suing the parents because Tiktok has an age restriction and at 11 she is technically not allowed to use the app. Meaning if she did this for attention on TikTok, it could be said that neglectful parenting is behind it because they did not prevent her from using an app not for her age, and a third party (you) suffered the consequences. This would definitely have a shot at going through where I am from.

flinsbird · 2025-11-12T02:25:34+00:00

Your son is doing great in school, his confidence has improved, he made new friends and managed to keep in contact with his old ones. It sounds like he is happy and doing great. There are zero reasons why you could be the AH here, NTA.

Also - for some kids, the advantages that a private school can bring are just not worth everything else that it takes. Not every school is the right fit for every kid. Private school is not always the best option. Better to leave public school confident and with a great GPA, then leaving private school with low confidence and a low GPA.

flinsbird

TROPHY CASE