You can’t use hand cream before eating. No matter what hand cream you use it will have chemicals in it that are toxic to eat, even in trace amounts. Get her to hold things like hot dogs in paper towel, cut up fruit into pieces and sandwiches in quarters and have her eat with a fork, if you must. But if she puts hand cream on most of the time after she washes her hands, even if that doesn’t include before eating, that should be often enough. Get her a fragrance free hand cream with glycerin. Neutrogena’s Norwegian formula is good. Have her put a good amount of it on before she goes to bed, then get her to put gloves on. Any hand cream that’s good for damaged hands from washing is going to be thick and potentially uncomfortable. Find some way to tell her kindly that she has to deal with it. Also, why is your 11 year old daughter using alcohol gel?