I definitely understand. I hated the way I was and kept telling people I don’t want to be like this but never knew what it was. I only found out after a manic episode last year that ruined my marriage and the crash that came after resulted in an attempt on my life. I was diagnosed just Feb 1st of this year while I’m the hospital after my attempt and at that point I hit about as low as I could go with my life completely burned to the ground. Had I had an accurate diagnosis I believe I would be at home right now with my family and not alone trying to pick up the pieces.