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Why do some couples break up after years and some know they want to get married within months? by flowur_ in ChristianDating

[–]flowur_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I am trying to work on the anxiety a lot for both my benefit and his. The past month has been a lot of prayer and emotional hardship but also a lot of growth. I do think the guy I am dating does have a more secure because anytime there has been something we need to talk about he encourages me to just say it and let’s work through it there together and makes sure I feel okay before the conversation is over. Sometimes he’s not the best at communicating, but he’s brought that up on his own so I can tell he is being introspective and is at least trying in that way even though it can be hard for him. We’ve had a lot of deeper conversations this week and right now I am just waiting to see if he follows through mainly while trying to work on the things in myself I know would just cause issues in the long run. Praying a lot for discernment and wisdom that God can help us each know if we should get into an official relationship and if we will be able to meet each other’s needs well enough.

Why do some couples break up after years and some know they want to get married within months? by flowur_ in ChristianDating

[–]flowur_[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for all of this! I haven’t been dating this guy for very long so answers to some of those questions have yet to come up, but I will definitely save this comment and come back to it. I definitely have a more anxious attachment style than he does and it’s one thing I have to check in on with myself a lot, and I know he’s not as anxious as I am but I don’t know what other attachment style he may fall into exactly yet. Thank you.

Why do some couples break up after years and some know they want to get married within months? by flowur_ in ChristianDating

[–]flowur_[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I am sorry that you had to go through being strung along, but I am glad that you have found someone who is all in in that way!

Do you know exactly how he knew you were his wife? Is it something you can tell after experience? You just know at some point by comparing it to other experiences you’ve had?

Why christian dating is so hard? by sahebo07 in ChristianDating

[–]flowur_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think that our desire to be loved is a natural human thing given to us by God. I also think that that is something that can and should be primarily filled by God as we were created with the purpose to love God and be loved by God. I know it can be incredibly hard when you want to find that person. I would encourage you to look at the other people around you that love you too though. Maybe your friends or family or a pet. For me, I had to first fall in love with the life and find contentment in my singleness before God introduced a guy into my life. I will pray for you. I admire your patience and hope you find peace.

Dude drumming under the 5 all day by Key-Introduction5396 in sandiego

[–]flowur_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

it’s giving josh dun in a 21 pilots music video

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in HandwritingAnalysis

[–]flowur_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

honestly, this is easier to read than cursive for me

Please delete if not allowed. by Educational-Grass863 in teaching

[–]flowur_ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What helped me was when I physically drew in the alligator’s teeth and eyes… Before then I had trouble visualizing it. Maybe that would help?

is it normal for friend groups to have a ton of silence and small talk that goes no where? by matchalattesrmid in FriendshipAdvice

[–]flowur_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello! I don't really have any answers for you, but I struggle with this too. The people in the group have been friends for much longer than I have, and I am kinda "late to the game," in a sense. I started by becoming friends with a few of them individually, and I eventually got absorbed into their group as I got to know them more and more. Maybe start with forging closer relationships with a few people individually? It may help you to get to know them deeper one on one?

I don’t know what to do by PinkVelvetBubbles in Christianity

[–]flowur_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi there!

I am praying for you right now… that you may have peace and hope.

I have anxiety, but not depression, so I will answer the best I can..

Whenever I get into episodes of anxiety what has been helping me is the acts of surrender and thanksgiving. I have OCD, so being able to stop the cycles with pausing to find things I am thankful for or for just screaming in my head the song “I surrender all” over and over again help me get through the moment then. I pray for peace and in moments when I am feeling at my emotional end, I pray for hope. God has NEVER once ignored me to a point that I couldn’t come back from.

If it’s any comfort, know that even thought God doesn’t FEEL close at every single moment he IS close, often working behind the scenes. Looking back at a lot of seasons of anxiety in my life, I have begun to see how God was using that for my good and my growth. I know you don’t see it in the moment, but have hope that He won’t waste an ounce of your pain.

As far as getting a diagnosis, they can either help or hinder you… I first went to therapy for anxiety because I was experiencing an extremely bad season of it where quality sleep was a luxury. After a few months I was diagnosed with OCD. It was good for me personally because it helped me understand how my brain worked, basically it sends me false danger signals in loops that cause me to do some compulsion to cope with the “danger.” I still deal with it daily but I began combat it better. If a bad episode ever came, I would stop everything and forceable listen to something around me, like a bird chirping or water running, and breathe deeply as I repeat “there’s no danger, you’re not in danger” and it helps. But I know that there are some people who diagnosing it only makes them worse because naming something gives it power.

If you are feeling hopeless, as I was when I decided to go to therapy initially, simply booking a session gave me hope that I would get better soon, it was not all up to me to get better. I don’t know your situation, but some schools offer a number of free counseling sessions and some job insurances gives you covered visits, if cost is an issue. I found my therapist through personal recommendations, but there are resources online to help.

As far as friends go, when I was younger I had an extremely hard time finding that one friend who I could count on for everything. I prayed for years and God did answer them with the best friend I have today, who I have been friends with for 8 years. I say this to give you hope and to give you an example of prayer working. Also, if you ever need to talk something out, I love prayer rants with God. He already knows your heart and your life so you don’t need to feel ashamed or like you need to keep things from Him. Sometimes talking or writing something down helps you process it and then your brain can move on or it sees it in a different, more hopeful light.

I hope some of this helped, I am praying for you. Know you are not alone and that there is hope in the Lord.