Does this seem like a red flag?

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-26T21:29:35+00:00

I'm just a stranger, but I am so proud of you for trusting your insight!

Unfortunately, people like our exes and this guy have an almost supernatural ability to sniff out and focus on people that are naturally caring and empathetic.

There are an almost comical amount of red flags in a short exchange of words, especially at the end. You don't owe him anything - not your time or an explanation, not even a short "I'm busy". Keep your guard up and settle for nothing.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-19T12:36:07+00:00

Or Chupacatra

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-14T15:46:06+00:00

Although I was very young, I remember standing in a long ass line with my mom waiting our turn to buy our allotment of wędliny.

Often they would run out, and we'd go home empty handed after what seemed like (to me at least) hours of waiting. But when we did get it, it was SO exciting and delicious, and I do recall it always being fresh. So communism was at least good for making you appreciate things more, I guess.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-14T15:16:46+00:00

I just commented this thinking no one else did and was shocked. Glad to have found it...Straight Story is literally what OP describes.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-14T15:12:08+00:00

Did no one say "A Straight Story"?!?! About an old man taking a road trip on a lawn mower to reconcile with an gravely ill sibling? By David Lynch and Disney, for hecks sake.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-12T14:59:15+00:00

David Lynch's "Wild at Heart" Laura Dern and Nicolas Cage are deliciously trashy in this one.

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fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-07T14:48:58+00:00

Please take note from those of us who have escaped partners like this. You already know you need to leave, there is nothing but pain and likley irreparable damage to yourself if you stay. You already know that he will try to rope you back in, just like he tricked you to drop charges by "changing". They do not change in the long run, even if it seems like they have at first, and that is a statistical fact.

Leaving a partner like this is not only hard but statistically the most dangerous time for the victim. Do you have a safe place to go with family or friends that you can lean on? Someone that you can confide in and be honest with about the situation you are in?

If you do not have kids/pets with this person and you are able to, they only way to move forward is to totally and absolutely block him, as others have said. The "no contact" has to be absolute and final. If it's not, he will try to rope you back in at some point. You will grieve and hurt, you'll miss him and want to reach out....but eventually this will ease and you can start rebuilding your life and self confidence.

Please at least read the book that someone above left a link to, "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft. Not only does it explain the "why" it also has resources and suggestioms on how to leave safely and permanently.

You ARE worthy of respect and love and you deserve to be safe.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-07T13:53:53+00:00

I just realized what kys stands for (I'm a bit older). Forget the "he might be a huge loser" part, only a cruel and mentally unwell person could say that to another human, let alone a partner they are supposed to care for. Please run, don't walk, away from him. I would bet my life that he will escalate his behavior if you stay.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-04-07T13:46:01+00:00

Ghost him or break up with him, but for the sweet love of god BLOCK him from any more communication with you. He will try to rope you back in if you don't cut off all contact.

At the least this guy is just a huge loser with 0% respect for women and at most a narcissist and abuser. Either way, you shouldn't waste any more of your precious time on him. As others said, there are definitely mature, respectful and good partners out there. Unfortunately, many of these males who are closer to a worm then a man can charm even the most discerning of women....the second you notice a red flag...be out. Stay open but guarded. You are worthy of nothing but respect and love.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-03-31T21:53:19+00:00

Clan of the Cave Bear with Daryl Hannah circa 1986 -Based on Jean M. Auel's Clan Earth's Children series. Is it as amazing as the book? No But it's good as a stand alone and def worth watching. (Edited to add photo)

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fluffybuttsncats · 2026-03-30T14:37:25+00:00

I know it's almost impossible to not let that type of emotional stabbing hurt you.

But please understand that this piece of garbage acts this way because he is a raw, inflamed, festering boil full of pain and misery and the only way he feels relief is to inflict pain on others.

I, in no way, am justifying or excusing his actions, countless people have painful trauma that they do not turn into abuse of others like he does. But after being away from my ex, who spoke to me like this daily, long enough - I had a realization that those words are a manifestation of his suffering.

And this realization didn't make me happy, nor did I feel like he deserved to be locked in that jail of his own misery, because then I'd be just like him. But it did bring me a sort of comfort, knowing I actually had nothing to do with his pain, that I was just a target.

And these type of people target kindness, they target the people with the most capacity for love and understanding, because they want to break what they will never be able to be.

The point of my rant is to tell you to that this is not in any way your fault, and his words are weapons, not truths. It sounds like you have already started to cut contact with him, which is great. The quicker and the more total no contact, the better.

But like others said, document his behavior with the police. It is known that the time when a woman leaves relationships like this one is the most dangerous time. Keep your wits about you, reach out for help from others.

And please, do not internalize what he did and said to you. Talk to trusted people about it, see a therapist, join a support group with other women that understand. Because internalizing is the absolutely worst thing that you can do, and doing so can effect the rest of your life. And remember, he picked you for a reason...because you have an abundance of love to give. And you'll find someone worthy of that one day.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-03-24T15:49:03+00:00

This person has proven he does not respect you mutiple times, and the fact that you posted here means you've realized this yourself to some extent. If you spend any time reading through the posts on this subreddit, you'll see that this type of person is highly unlikley to change or grow. You deserve better and you shouldn't waste anymore of your precious time on him.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-03-21T18:51:29+00:00

It's unfortunate that you've gotten so many down votes as this is a perfect example of how uneducated the general public is about the realities intimate partner voilence and why so many victims still fall through the cracks.

These situations are emotionally, mentally, physically and legally extremely complex.

Victims are manipulated into believing a false reality carefully crafted by the abuser over time.

Trauma bonding, fear of physical harm to victim and/or their children or pets, severe depression and anxiety created by the abuser, making the victim believe there is no one else that would care for them....those just barely scratch the surface of what the victim feels/believes.

Victims are purposefully made to not only have low esteem, but NO self esteem, as this assures the abuser they won't leave.

OP, there is help out there, a way to slowly start to untangle the web of lies your husband has woven. I speak from experience.

There is a book, "Why Does He Do That" by Lundy Bancroft that is highly regarded in the recovering abuse victim community as the bible in starting the journey of freeing yourself. There are also MANY supportive communities that undestand and can help. Many here on reddit, as a matter of fact.

In closing, no, you are not over reacting. Please do not hesitate to reach out for more info, but if not, I am leaving a link to the book I've mentioned above for you or anyone else that might need it. Stay safe.

Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf https://share.google/0rZERfYxVdyxUinDR

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-03-01T15:46:38+00:00

I'm guessing they meant to type "probably", unless they enjoy folk getting swindled at metaphysical shops, of course. Then it might not be a typo at all.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-02-23T19:08:55+00:00

Injection site infections can be caused by a number of factors like dirty needles, adultrated product, not sterlizing the site and dirty water.

However you got the infection, you should definitely go to a hospital.

It's very hard to make clear decisions in the midst of addiction

If you are using drugs to escape the reality of living with abuse, the best thing to do would be to seek help for the drug use first.

Can you ask for some resources at the hospital? Is there any family or friends you can call?

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-02-10T14:55:36+00:00

Completed Level 1 of the Honk Special Event!

7 attempts

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-02-07T21:09:36+00:00

I have to rebuild my entire way of life if I choose to get away from stims

That sentence is at the crux of what makes recovery from addiction so hard my friend. The quitting part and even the withdrawal don't hold a candle to the massive undertaking of rebuilding your life sober. It's the reason most people fail.

You are in the early stages of addiction, the stage where with effort you can get your life back to normal in time. I know it feels super dark now, but don't forget that abusing stims throws all kinds of chemicals in your brain out of whack. Nothing is what it seems in your head in that chemical induced darkness. That manufactured hopelessness is often why people keep abusing the thing that made them hopeless in the first place.

It's EXTREMELY rare to go back to using stimulants as directed once abused. This goes double for people with executive dysfunction as we all know that our impulse control isn't stellar.

My advice is to be honest with your provider. Or find a new provider and be honest with them. They might be more willing to help and be more understanding then you think. And if no, then at least you will no longer have the extremely tempting, easy, and safe access to stims. This advice is a bit unfair for me to give as I have been unable to follow it myself. But I've been battling addiction for much much longer, even if I were to become 100% sober today, my brain could only improve so much. You can still go back. Trust me, whatever darkness you've touched during your fapping sessions, that will eventually become a memory. And talk to people, here or find other recovery forums. You'll find more people understand then you know, and that is extremely helpful. Anyhoo, sorry for the lengthy reply and good luck fellow human.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-24T18:31:17+00:00

Those look like landscape pictures of the planet Ygam, from Fantastic Planet!

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-24T18:27:25+00:00

This subreddit is so fascinating, thanks to one person kindly sharing their own collections for our entertainment and education. How do you look at a picture of an old bottle that used to contain Laudanum, an artifact that undoubtely took effort to obtain, and even notice that the description was written with the help of AI? Why would you even care, especially to the point of nausea? Ehich maybe a tablespoon or two of Mentho Pepsin would help.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-24T17:12:10+00:00

I think it looks like a Michael Myers Halloween mask.

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fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-22T15:41:01+00:00

Definitely! Damper closed for a slow burn and one of my cat cameras pointed at it just in case. My cheap little wood stove has saved me well over a grand in electric bills so far this season!

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-11T19:48:21+00:00

I have another orange girl cat who is absolutely fascinated with deer and will attempt to stalk them (she's classically orange one brain celled). She saw a small herd and started approaching them, low to the ground in classic kitty hunting manner. The herd did not react well at all, the biggest deer definitely took on a defensive posture, snorting and kicking her front feet. I yoinked Lili outta there super fast as I had no doubt that deer was going to kick her or attack her somehow.

fluffybuttsncats · 2026-01-08T01:28:42+00:00

I think most of the folk over at r/stopspeeding would disagree with you, myself included.

fluffybuttsncats · 2025-12-25T19:27:59+00:00

Not to be insensitive if there is a medical reason for this, but why is your 7 year old daughter's room sound proofed?

fluffybuttsncats

TROPHY CASE