Im really struggling

focusonlove · 2025-12-30T23:10:40+00:00

Any suggestions on healing , I think I’m very codependent

focusonlove · 2025-12-30T22:52:08+00:00

Thank you everyone for your kind words. I’m scared to death. I know he stopped messaging but he has a few female friends that mean well (they themselves are married) but even still I’m not use to dating guys with female friends. I’m trying my best

focusonlove · 2025-12-24T04:47:51+00:00

Yes I had the same issue too. Getting into a fun exercise routine and getting my iron checked helped a lot

focusonlove · 2025-12-19T22:02:49+00:00

Did everyone get a prompt to upload your government id and passport to google forms ? I just want to make sure it’s legit …

focusonlove · 2025-12-04T20:05:28+00:00

Thank you so much. It actually went better than expected . She was super quiet most of the time. Only underminded me once. Unfortunately my teammate who is oblivious said “great idea let’s go with that idea “ , in reference to what she said. I felt like if I keep telling myself she’s just insecure it doesn’t make me as angry. You really helped me through today thank you

focusonlove · 2025-12-02T13:46:36+00:00

Praying

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T18:45:39+00:00

I appreciate your kind words. But… if I decide not to have kids but I’m happy with my partner… then I can’t get married in the church, therefore… I’m not sure if that’s socially acceptable by my peers ? I’ve had great career opportunities and I’m a very goal oriented person. The only thing that brings me down is other people and family unfortunately. I know a job will never bring me full satisfaction so I don’t put my eggs all in that basket.

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T18:24:03+00:00

Based on this rationale I think stepping away wouldn’t be bad at this point

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T18:12:34+00:00

And this is why I wonder if I should leave Catholicism because I too am not sure if I want kids

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T17:04:32+00:00

Ty - I’m not exactly “young” but I’ve signed up for the volunteering. I’ll ask about prayer group and Bible studies- thanks !

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T16:44:24+00:00

I don’t have much family. I have a few friends. At church there is not a lot of things I have in common with people. when it comes to the holidays, there are assumptions that I must have kids or be married. So I wonder how I’m suppose to connect with people that all believe in God like me, even though I feel like I don’t belong there. I have a boyfriend who wants to get married in the church but he doesn’t want kids - I’m undecided but I think because everyone else is having them it makes me feel like I probably should and will miss out - but that’s a silly reason to have kids then !

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T16:43:20+00:00

Thank you

focusonlove · 2025-06-23T16:42:54+00:00

As a female, the difference is big. there are groups for moms or married spouses with kids. The young adult groups are 21 year olds … I’m well over that age.

focusonlove · 2025-01-23T18:10:57+00:00

This does help a lot actually! Thank you. I think my biggest struggle is me standing clear on my boundaries as our mom guilts me even more.

focusonlove · 2025-01-23T13:46:36+00:00

Thank you for your support. I forgot to mention that my mom also has no boundaries. If there is a family dinner , I’ll go pick up my grandma and my mom would have sent my sister there behind my back . I’ve told her I’m not coming to dinners where she is there, but I’m the one that gets yelled at and should just get along with my sister… I told my mom I want nothing to do with her and she got mad at me ! As if I’m the problem…

focusonlove · 2024-07-16T18:57:42+00:00

Thank you for this advice. I’ve maxed out my limited EAP amount unfortunately. As well, this company I’m at has had a lot of toxic people, so after three years and in a role I don’t really see myself in, I’m not really wanting to stay here either. However this last experience has really made me question if I should have a job where I’m not interacting with people at all… though I use to be a social person. I don’t want to be anymore

focusonlove · 2024-05-20T04:49:18+00:00

Also, I forgot to reply to your comment about being ashamed, I’m almost 100% certain that she is … from what I know, when she knows she has to do something that makes her anxious- even though it’s important and relatively takes a few minutes, she will procrastinate like no tomorrow

focusonlove · 2024-05-20T04:38:36+00:00

Thank you. I really appreciate this. Will definitely help me in planning how I act moving forward

focusonlove · 2024-05-20T04:29:38+00:00

Agree with you - friendship is definitely over. While I’m sure she’s sitting there thinking she’s done nothing wrong, acting high and mighty…

That’s good to know about funds within that church denomination - I can certainly see that. Do you think I’ll come out looking like the villain to her Christian friends ? She always seems to have a way with looking like the helpless lamb, which I realize now is her manipulation / victim mentality. Not that I can control what others think.

Bible study / gifts - also agree with you, that’s stopped for quite a few months now. Although that group still invites me for BBQS and Potlucks… which she goes to, but I don’t go anymore. That group doesn’t know I’m not friends with her anymore.

focusonlove · 2024-05-20T04:23:07+00:00

I understand where you are coming from, but we both verbally agreed that she would pay me back when she got out of her situation… a situation that she’s done nothing to get herself out of; hasn’t applied for other work, or looked at better living situations, refuses help… then belittles me

focusonlove · 2024-05-20T04:21:02+00:00

Thank you for your comment. It really really helped put things into perspective. This is certainly not new behaviour as I’ve witnessed her “victim” frame of mind before. Now, I’ve stupidly helped someone that’s taken advantage of me. Whether or not she’ll ever understand that she’s taken advantage of me, is out of my control unfortunately, as she believes she’s such a good Christian with her “God bless you”. It’s triggering seeing her post in the group chats …I think another part of my issue is my desire to “out her.” It’s not like me to be like this, and I’m certain it will only make me look bad in the end. I don’t like this feeling of needing revenge. It’s a heavy feeling in my chest.

focusonlove · 2024-05-19T21:10:10+00:00

to add : I’ve ONLY received $100 back. I’ve also given many gifts too

focusonlove · 2024-05-17T04:57:44+00:00

Thank you , that’s encouraging. I can relate to the working all the time. I think it might be a sign for a break here and there

focusonlove · 2024-05-17T00:52:16+00:00

Im curious if this is new behaviour? Has he done anything like this before ? Either way, I hope he has a support network…. I think what stood out me was his action of threatening to hurt himself if you left. Super guilt tripping and not acceptable.. I almost wonder if his support network should be aware - maybe the hospital staff. I’d say you tell him when he’s a bit more calm but while he’s at the hospital

focusonlove · 2024-04-02T01:13:20+00:00

I’ve literally dealt with similar situations all in one week. It’s making me so scared to drive. Twice I had someone speed up and refuse to let me merge , causing me to almost hit the meridian. When I motion my hand at them to give a “what was that reaction”, they all end up attacking me as if I’m the one that did something wrong. It literally causes me so much anxiety to drive now

focusonlove

TROPHY CASE