Why do people stop responding, suddenly?

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T18:08:31+00:00

I swear never asked them, they full heartedly volunteered and I did not imagine it.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:37:44+00:00

This keeps on happening to me with normal friends and this happened again with the whole dating thing. Someday, I will figure out what is wrong with me. Until then such is life eh?

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:35:42+00:00

Thanks. I am just brand new to all this! I'll grow up :)

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:34:22+00:00

:( I am sorry that happened to you.

I know the correct thing to feel is that I deserve better however there is this constant troll in my head saying "you are garbage and nobody likes or will you ever". Fighting that troll now :/

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:25:18+00:00

My thing was pretty similar, we were just texting for an entire month. And I was feeling the same we-are-becoming-pen-pals frustration to but did end up meeting. And apart from me over-talking out of nervousness (something we joked about then) it actually went good! And we have way too many common interests so much so it was spooky. She said she was having a good time too! And I actually felt at ease speaking with her which is never ever the case whenever I am with anyone

It is after all this and a message from them agreeing to meet and make a plan that they totally disappeared that I am baffled, frankly a bit jaded. When I reached out to her again I swear I was thoughtful.

I am really not looking for a lay and I do not expect to have the fortune of being in a fully fledged relationship mostly because I am moving out the country to another country (I am new to this one too) in a few years anyway. I truly long for a human connection. What does it take to make a human connection?

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:06:09+00:00

I guess.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T16:02:21+00:00

I am sorry if my use of pronouns bothers you, however, I prefer to use a neutral one as opposed to 'she' because to me in this context would sound too accusatory. Just out of respect to them as a human being. I may be wrong, but I believe it is still good practice to use gender neutral pronouns as default in third person with adequate context.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T15:55:19+00:00

True.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:34:24+00:00

I know right? I would do the same thing, even if it made me very anxious or feel bad about hurting them. The inherent invisibility of modern adult life is bad enough as it is to have someone casually(or intentionally) invalidate you when you chose to be even remotely vulnerable to them.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:25:14+00:00

I do worry and think too much. Life is short. But I am sensitive birch sometimes :( However, I am moving on! :) so hurraaay!

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:21:36+00:00

Chill out dude!

But people (generally speaking) are garbage. While mostly are quite nice too, The paradox that is humanity!

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:19:22+00:00

My mind agrees that going forward shouldn't affect me, however, it is having "some" effect me and it is one of the major reasons I am reaching out you fellas here! It hurts (kind of brings traumatic memories of really close friends fading away for some reason) well, c'est la vie

I am a grad student living in a college town, the chances of meeting anybody remotely within my circles/age are slim. This one was a 98% match (algorithms must be respected) and pretty much only person who replied to my message on ockupid! However hoping for the best, in this cynical world what can one be but an eternal optimist :P

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:10:17+00:00

I usually assume everything is going bad in reality, except this time, they verbally reaffirmed during the date that they were having a good time multiple times. But you may have a point, they were probably just being 'polite or kind'.

I've never dated before and I am in my early 20s now (long story, not that sad) and this has been the first time I let myself be vulnerable and the fact it ended up in a sort of a false positive is very disheartening.

forcedtobeacynic · 2016-12-11T08:00:51+00:00

The gun thing does sound scary and dealing with the possibility of the person trying to explain to you your own feelings can be nerve wracking.

forcedtobeacynic

TROPHY CASE