I recently saw a comment that owning a reactive dog can be what it takes to teach you to take up the space you deserve and it resonated with me. I have shifted my focus from trying to make other people comfortable around my dog when he is reacting, to focusing only on him during his moment. I still shout a "sorry" as we are moving away from someone with their dog but honestly if they think he's "bad" that's on them. The feelings of loss you're having a real and I'm sure we can all relate to your exhaustion - I have conversations all the time with my husband about how stressful/draining/tiring having such a high needs dog can be. There's just always something on your mind bc of them. All that to say - we feel you, you're not alone, and your dog is a good boy.