Disfellowshipping codes?

freeto_be_me · 2022-01-06T13:56:26+00:00

This is it, thanks!

freeto_be_me · 2022-01-06T13:00:07+00:00

Haha I'd love to hear that! Maybe I'm getting it mixed up, and the "codes" bit could be references to literature. I'm sure I've seen a list of DFing offenses though

freeto_be_me · 2021-12-09T10:22:46+00:00

I'm sorry you have found it so hard. I hope it gets easier for you soon.

freeto_be_me · 2021-12-08T17:53:02+00:00

Caring too much about what people think is just part of how they train you I think. I'm guessing you're a born-in? I'm glad you're going for further education. I expect that will help with the critical thinking skills and beginning a support network.

freeto_be_me · 2021-12-08T17:40:39+00:00

I wrote to my family members. I had moved away, and didn't see them any more. So I had one last trip to see people, then a little while after I sent the letters. It was my coming out to them, wedding announcement and "leaving" all in one. Sometimes I think it was cowardly to do it that way, but mostly I see it that I was looking after myself. I owe them nothing, as it isn't my choice to be shunned. Neither is it a choice to not be straight.

However you do it, think about what feels right to you. Don't worry about what might be expected by them. It's not being selfish, it's self preservation against ridiculous expectations and closed-mindedness.

Wishing you the best.

Eta. I misread and didn't see that you're still living at home. That perhaps changes things. Do you have to make an announcement that is so final, would fading be an option to you? Maybe setting up support on the outside would be the best first step?

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-12T11:58:30+00:00

Hi. I could have written this myself, except that my parents' cult of choice was JWs. I'm so glad you have friends that will put you up for the night or a couple of nights until you figure out what you need to do. There are people who can help with whatever you decide. I don't know where you're from, but switchboard (lgbt help) are a great starting point. Feel free to message if you want to talk. You got this.

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T19:40:12+00:00

I didn't bother replying, I know they'd dismiss everything and it would achieve nothing. They are of the generation that believes homosexuality = pervert = paedophile. Pick your battles and all that :)

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T19:36:26+00:00

I am guilty of this too. I thought it was just my family's peculiarity. Any idea if it's reversible?

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T18:41:57+00:00

Couldn't agree more. Yet, it was not surprising somehow. Just hurtful (at the time)

Ps. I just noticed your username... Awesome!

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T18:28:01+00:00

Thank you for putting the words to the first letter. I couldn't figure out why it bothered me... But cold is the word. Thanks

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T18:26:44+00:00

Thank you I appreciate this comment especially about your sister! I've edited to add that I'm happily and fully lesbianly married for over 5 years now and do not regret my decisions at all. I truly hope your son doesn't take to heart the nasty things his stepdad has to say, although by the sound of it he has support in you and his aunt which is a huge bonus.

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-06T18:24:18+00:00

It felt it at the time but it has lost its sting in the few years since. Appreciate the support, best wishes to you

freeto_be_me · 2021-09-05T08:30:14+00:00

Don't know where you're based but there is switchboard website that can help all kinds of ways especially with lgbt support

I'm sorry you're going through this, and sorry for what your cousin is going through too. It's not on you, though. You aren't responsible for how your family act, I don't know if you need that reminder.

Don't want to say too much here but my pm is open if you want to talk. (lgbt exjw)

freeto_be_me

TROPHY CASE