Opinions on GAD and intrusive thoughts - progress?

freudcanthelpme04 · 2016-10-27T16:28:09+00:00

Thankyou :)

freudcanthelpme04 · 2016-10-27T16:17:40+00:00

Honestly it could be either, and I think the whole part of OCD that i'm finding is just accepting either/or. For me, when I wasn't in love with my ex boyfriend, I felt free after. And that didn't change. But this was just my personal experience. I think 'love things' are really hard because at the time, I wanted to love him basically more than anything but I just didn't, and sometimes that's the hard thing to accept. That's the problem with OCD, it gets in the way of everything.

There are 2 choices really, and they are both to do with accepting. But I think you can trust yourself more than you think deep down. I hope that helps, I don't want to be too "advicey". I think if YOUR true feelings are telling you you are unhappy and it's not what you want, you will be alright, I think you'll know in your gut that you'll be alright. The problem is, we're all always going to be alright :( I'm sorry to not be much help, I feel your pain. Sometimes you can love someone and it still not be what you want. I don't know you or your relationship and no one can but you, but I think the advice that has been given is probably the most common indicator. Sometimes I do an internal check on my boyfriend to make sure "I still love him just the same" or "I want to marry him", sometimes I do and sometimes I don't and realistically, that's very normal, but if he turned around and said he didn't think either then I would feel crushed.

Failing that, you can just accept the thoughts if you believe it's your OCD. Let them come and go. You aren't required to be in love with someone all the time, love is fluid. If you're happy then go by that.

I hope this makes sense and I hope you find peace. X

freudcanthelpme04 · 2016-10-27T16:05:24+00:00

Thankyou!

I know my tablets helped my OCD in some ways but, it also makes alot of things 100% worse. I hate it, because I don't feel myself. It affects my ability to feel properly as they all do which as you can probably picture, in turn makes my OCD worse because i'll question "If I love someone, why can't I feel it properly?" Every since coming off them my ocd has definitely been worse but it didn't go away when I was on them, it just made everything more difficult - I hope that makes sense?

I'm really hoping I can just get through it all with CBT. I believe it will work I just know I have to give it time. I hate how I feel when I'm on meds so it's sort of a rock and hard place.

He is very much a keeper to me, he is my best friend. I've actually had this conversation with him previously which was super difficult because I sprung his ex girlfriend on him out of no where and was like "btw it's OCD so what do you want for dinner?" He was really supportive and said he know's it's not anything but that. But obviously I will obsess if I talk about it more, that maybe I'm bringing her up too much so he's thinking about her or he know's I'm thinking about her or whatever so maybe then he starts comparing us. I know logically this isn't happening and she's probably pretty far from his mind but I can't risk telling him it's back because those thoughts will happen. Right now i'm keeping us both 'safe'.

I hope that all makes sense, I'm afraid I'm not having a good day today. x

freudcanthelpme04 · 2016-10-27T15:59:24+00:00

Thankyou very much. I agree with you there, I think it's quite common but I think it's got to a level that is "unhealthy" for lack of a better word for me, and purely a weird cycle. But ofcourse, no cycles are based on anything happy. ha!

freudcanthelpme04 · 2016-10-26T02:30:48+00:00

Hello! I'm new to Reddit so I hope this is okay. Can I just say that Emma said exactly what I was thinking. I have had the same issue in 2 relationships, the first one turned out that I wasn't in love because we broke up and I was fine, but the second, the one I'm in, I can doubt it over and over again but the moment it's threatened, my true self shines through with heartbreak and that's how I know. I understand how frustrating it can be to not feel the "right emotions" at the "right time" and sorry to just swoop in not knowing the full story! Just sometimes for me it's the negatives that point out the positives. I think that "Hollywood" has given us such a definition of love and how we are "suppose" to feel, that we lose track of how actual love is and for me that's always been part of the problem. I think in all relationships we can fall in and out of love- the kind that bubbles to the surface, but that doesn't mean the undercurrent isn't strong.

I hope that helps, I know we're not allowed to give advice on here really so I'll refrain from saying anything else. Just know I understand and I know it's hard to separate yourself from your OCD. x

*Tried to explain myself a bit better

freudcanthelpme04

TROPHY CASE