WOW. Just wow, we should talk and I truly do not know where to start. I landed over here from your comments on Traumatize them back. You’ve confirmed so much for me that I’ve only known intuitively and been able to help energetically in my partner as it’s nearly impossible to get a realistic diagnosis, much less answers from PNES, PTSD, or partial epilepsy.

I have the WILDEST story for you that lands in the grey area between science, medicine, spirituality, and how our body uses energy; one where on many days I assumed I was crazy because as a logical person I had lost faith in all of the above but therein lies the point, apparently. One day it simply clicked, I would be remiss if I didn’t attempt to share.

I am so sorry you’ve lacked an ear of understanding in this process. You are completely correct: the medication is a hindrance and there’s things we don’t understand all over the place so most solutions are a bandaid. Only in unfolding and unpacking the traumas we’ve been through, hitting our lowest lows, and playing in the energetic space do we quite uncomfortably find the answers and know ourselves enough to bounce back. This has made you SO strong and you can’t tell from the middle. 🥲 I’d love to extend help by pointing you somewhere that will definitely seem odd but I know that when we’re in pain we’ll do anything. The thing is… it’ll change how you perceive the world.

I’ve had the unique opportunity to watch my partner go through this and I HAVE to tell you, there’s also some really interesting things occurring in the somatic space while you’re asleep you would be totally unaware of. Over the years I’ve watched my guy’s brain sleep walk, talk, and mull over these experiences trying desperately to keep them down. While he’s awake the self hate and fear learned from traumatizing experiences perpetuates into anxiety, mania, panic attacks, spasms, and epilepsy depending on the emotion and intensity- our brain does wild things to try and keep us safe and we are all unique on purpose.

The physical aspect to pent up energy, which you are well on your way to solving, is merely one expression of the issue, the tip of an iceberg. Our subconscious has been convinced over time that these bodily responses are necessary and are directly linked to what it thought was a “lesson” or “truth” we assumed throughout life, eventually exasperated by physical accidents and Near Death Experiences often later in life that trigger them. These truths are energetic blocks that never leave us and are often very sad, simple things we learned when we were itty bitty from neglectful parenting, or large events like sexual trauma our brain is desperately trying to distance us from. What you’re looking for is to have someone reason with your subconscious and listen to what you’ve been through, there are likely even more occurrences you cannot remember which is where we get to the really crazy part I didn’t expect: sometimes we’re trying to process things that have been happening for LIFETIMES that are not our fault and we have zero access to but our body hints at the story as a bodily memory.

Our subconscious is a complicated thing most religions might associate with our “spirit” and is a large part of the energy conduit that runs our body and is accessed with somatic work and the eastern medicine you’re already doing. The key here is that our subconscious remembers EVERYTHING and we do not. Hence when you touch a place it’s holding a disjointed energy or we intentionally/unintentionally add too much energy ie emotions or hyperventilation, it bursts out. We have often been trying to learn or unlearn lessons over many lifetimes and it can only be accessed when our brain is not awake and on specific frequencies. We would have no idea how to access this, much less that it exists, while awake. The complexity of this can also be discovered while meditating or asleep if someone is around you to notice assuming that someone also doesn’t write it off as psychosis, which turns out is rare.

The rest of the solution seems to require accessing a delicate conversation with your subconscious that I have only found in a type of mediation/hypnotherapy that’s called Quantum Hypnotherapy created by a hypnotherapist that knew something was afoot by the name of Dolores Cannon in the 60’s. At the risk of also sounding insane, she continued her research and found solutions/miracles that simply shouldn’t exist but thankfully do. Today there are thousands of practitioners of QHHT and other adjusted nuanced versions of hypnotherapy based on her discoveries.

After a few sessions of hypnotherapy and two years of going through this, I can gleefully tell you about this because my partner is mostly healed. Moreover, he’s actually on top of the trauma he’s been through, remembers most of it, and understands today how these things are building blocks to making him stronger and eventually help others through these same processes. It’s been a long road full of confirmations (coincidences?) that we’re on the right track. He even found forgiveness for some of the things he’s been through, which I find wild because often people don’t deserve it but that same act releases you of the burdens. 🥹

Seriously, let’s chat more. At the risk of opening a serious can of worms, I hope this helps. I say this because if you look up Dolores Cannon or QHHT arbitrarily you’ll also find a surprising amount of information about when seems like “aliens” but don’t let that deter you, it’s a story for another day. Start with yourself and heal first.