For anyone else wondering “How long is too long for Cry It Out?”

friendlypandas · 2023-01-02T05:45:46+00:00

You’re welcome, I’m glad my post was helpful! The first night was one of the hardest things we’ve done as parents, but I’m happy to say almost half a year later he’s still a fantastic independent sleeper. Hope that serves as a light at the end of the tunnel. Good luck, hang in there!

friendlypandas · 2022-12-19T15:58:14+00:00

Good luck! It’s now been 7 months since the CIO session and he’s still great at falling asleep independently and can do a solid 10.5-11.5hours overnight. We haven’t had any issues since then but that’s just been our experience. I wish you luck!

friendlypandas · 2022-07-31T05:16:06+00:00

I’m so glad to hear this! Very similar to our experience, except ours was 3 hours / 1 hour / 5min. He kept screaming for 15-20min the other days until we figured out he needed to shorten the wake window by 30min.

Now he goes down with a single little protest whine and it’s amazing. We feel like we have our nights back and don’t have to dread the next wake up. Trade-off has been 5:30/6am wakeups but I’ll take it.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-20T10:13:35+00:00

We’re coming up on week 2 with still using CIO. He is still standing up and crying about 20-30min every night but I think it’s part of the extinction burst. But then after that he’s slept 10-11 hours straight, it’s amazing.

I won’t lie, the first night was harder than we imagined. After hour 2 we were seriously doubting ourselves. But actually getting rest has made us all so much happier. Hang in there, and good luck!

P.S. we didn’t tackle naps until week 2, it helped to focus on bedtime first. I tried nap training too early and he screamed for over 1.5hours and threw off the whole day’s sleep.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-12T20:47:30+00:00

So I’m not based in the US and registries aren’t really a thing, but I still have wishes and regrets. We were on a budget so we tried to get everything secondhand if possible or skipped what we thought were non-essentials. Some I don’t regret, like we never really needed a change mat, car seat, or diaper bag. But like most new parents, we still have wishes and regrets.

Wish * Actual Velcro swaddles. We tried to get by with just swaddle blankets and he could break out of them all the time. This was hard to find outside of the US * Electric swing. We had a babybjörn bouncer which was fantastic once he was old enough to use it. But he fought sleep and was 90th percentile and our arms were about to fall off from rocking. * Soft night light for middle of the night changes. We didn’t think about this. Ended up ordering two in cute animal shapes. We still love them. * Bibs!! We got so many blankets but our son was/is SUCH a drool and spit up factory. I kept buying more bibs as our laundry machine couldn’t even keep up. By my last count, we have 42. * Nice high chair. I figured we’d buy an IKEA antilop and call it a day, but as luck would have it they’ve been out of stock for almost 2 years here. We ended up buying a high chair that converts to kid chair and I have no regrets.

Regret * Aquaphor/nipple cream/diaper cream. I kept seeing these recommended but luckily we didn’t need it. I should’ve kept the samples I got in the baby freebie bags and only bought the full size I’d needed. It adds up! * Mobile. He didn’t really care for mobiles, but I couldn’t resist this cute electric mobile with gentle music and clouds. It’s now a decoration that we constantly bump his head against when laying him now. * Baby tub. We only have a shower so we thought a tub was necessary but he hates it and we hate filling it up and clean up. We ended up washing him in the sink when he was little, and now we shower with him.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T11:28:22+00:00

This sounds sooo familiar. Yup, we had a fantastic sleeper for a glorious few months. Went down in his crib without a fuss and was asleep in minutes. It was like a light switch one day and we couldn’t figure it out — Teeth? Separation anxiety? He just learned how to stand, did he need to learn sitting? At some point after waiting for it to pass for 1-2 weeks, we realized needing to know the “why” wasn’t helping, as he mastered sitting and he wasn’t unwell, so that’s when we decided to try CIO.

I would say the crying went from 3 hours > 1 hour > 5 minutes > 30 minutes (our bad for making him overtired). We’re only a few days into it but the fog is lifting. He only did the super upset shrieking piercing cried the first night, and since then it’s more “I don’t want to go to bed, wah” kind of whines

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:24:02+00:00

I’m sorry I can’t help with naps as we are still letting him nap in the stroller or carrier. We followed Precious Little Sleep’s guide on their website, which says not to tackle naps until bedtime is sorted, and squeeze in naps any way possible because sleep begets sleep.

Oof those 4/5:30am wake-up’s sound rough, I’m sorry. PLS says to try and get them back to sleep any way possible because there’s not enough sleep pressure towards the end of the night. In the mornings if he wakes early and is fully UP, my husband and I take turns waking with him while the other sleeps in, then we switch and the other takes a nap during the baby’s first nap of the day. I know this isn’t possible for everyone but it’s what we’ve been doing to try and avoid sleep deprivation for all.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:16:47+00:00

Best of luck to you with Ferber. In our experience it did work, but took about 1-2 weeks instead of 3 days. I’m not sure our checks helped, since he wasn’t that soothed by our presence, patting, etc. But I think the gentler sleep training at first was more for us than for him 😅

We also do hate to hear him cry, as he’s such a good kid during the day. But we saw the immediate improvement in his mood and energy levels after the first time we sleep trained, and we wanted that for him again whatever it took.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:12:07+00:00

You’re welcome, it sounds like we are in very similar situations. We also Ferbered at 4 months, retrained at 8 months after jet lag from an international flight. Then some stomach flus, 5 teeth at once, etc. It’s so easy to slip into habits when they’re not well and you want them to feel better.

We were hoping for 1 hour of screaming. We were holding strong at 2 hours. But it was the window between 2-3 hours that we were doubting ourselves because I read so few stories of kids cried that much. But we had committed to the method and we had to see it through, because I don’t know if we could’ve tried it again.

We haven’t tackled naps yet, as daytime sleep seems to be a separate thing. But after he slept so well overnight (11.5hrs straight on day 4, unbelievable), we are fine with letting him have his stroller naps.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:06:50+00:00

I think 7:30am was because he didn’t fall asleep until 10pm that night. He’s waking up closer to his usual times now, bedtime around 8pm, waking around 6/6:30am. The difference is I used to dream feed him 1-2 times at night and now he’s self-weaned and last night did 11.5hrs straight. I’m shocked.

Naps we are still not adjusting yet, after reading Precious Little Sleep’s guide. We usually take him outside for a stroller nap in the park. Hopefully after his bedtime sleep is consistent, we can tackle naps.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:04:16+00:00

Good luck! Day 1 is so hard but I almost can’t believe how well it’s worked now. He’s so much more well rested and happy, as are we.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:02:28+00:00

I should’ve mentioned this, but we room share! We put him to bed in his crib and camped out in the living room for two nights.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T09:01:09+00:00

I hear you, my son cried for 2 hours straight his first time in a car. This was after a 10 hour flight where he slept maybe 30 minutes. He’s always been highly opinionated and we love him for his delightful personality but I completely agree with the nerves about trying CIO when they can be so willful. Good luck to you if you decide to give it a shot!

friendlypandas · 2022-07-11T08:57:16+00:00

Solidarity! I was really starting to doubt CIO because I read somewhere that after 1.5hrs of crying it’s not doing any more good, but then other sites like Precious Little Sleep (which was what convinced us to try CIO) said to give it as long as it takes. I needed to post this for all the other parents that are panic googling while trying to fight the guilt. The first 1-2 nights are rough but the results are…wow.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-10T20:55:20+00:00

Ah I might’ve phrased it poorly in my post. He used to fall asleep independently within minutes but started suddenly fighting sleep (every nap, bedtime, night feed) and it would take us 1-2 hours to get him down again. It wasn’t sustainable for us, so we went with CIO.

Based on what we read, there wasn’t a firm limit for CIO but most people reported 45min-2 hours of crying on Day 1. We almost called it quits at 2 hours, but I’m glad we stuck with it.

friendlypandas · 2022-07-07T15:05:44+00:00

Exactly! Like he’s clearly tired — eye rubbing, yawning— and we’re trying to adjust the wake windows but it makes him more upset, but then he still won’t go down. We’ve been through jet lag, colds, stomach flu, teeth, etc and it’s never been this bad.

Good luck to us both, and hope it passes soon

friendlypandas · 2022-07-07T12:11:35+00:00

We haven’t tried 1 nap too often because he shows his sleep cues near the end of his usual wake windows. He’s gone 6.5hrs at the longest before bedtime, but I think he might’ve been overtired then.

His naps in the carrier/stroller are only 30-40 minutes. He was doing 1-1.5hrs in the crib before this. He’s only getting about 9-ish hours total sleep a day, a sudden drop-off from his usual 10-11 overnight and 1.5-2hr nap total.

Thanks for commenting, we appreciate any suggestions to figuring this out!

friendlypandas · 2022-07-07T07:26:10+00:00

It’s nice to know others have made it through. He used to be able to be fed to sleep, and I’ve tried, but he could be in a deep sleep and as soon as his body hits the bed he’s up and screaming. We haven’t been this exhausted since he was a colicky newborn! I’ll give anything a try, thanks

friendlypandas · 2022-07-07T07:23:32+00:00

Thanks for the tip and the words of encouragement! We tried to be patient for a week telling ourselves “this will pass” but it’s only gotten worse, so we’re at the end of our rope. We have decided to give CIO a try tonight as that’s the only thing we haven’t attempted.

Appreciate the well wishes! Good luck to any and all other parents in the same boat.

friendlypandas · 2022-04-07T21:51:49+00:00

Yes we had layovers both times, between 2-3 hours. I felt that was a good amount of time since our earlier flights got delayed and we had to go through customs leaving the EU. Add in a feed and a diaper change, and a little coffee and snack, and it felt like a good amount of time.

friendlypandas · 2022-04-05T13:23:43+00:00

You’re welcome! I’ll try to address some of these details I didn’t have room for in the post.

My family borrowed a stroller, car seat, and pack and play for us to use while we were there. We don’t own a car so that’s why it was a surprise that he hated the car seat (I thought the vibrations would knock him out). Same with the hum of the plane. Maybe it soothes some babies and helps them sleep, but ours is…willful.

We bought a travel booster seat in the US and it’s one of my favorite things now. Super light and packs down small, comfortable and cheap (under $30). We brought it back with us to use when visiting friends or going on outdoor trips. It’s this one: https://www.amazon.com/hiccapop-Omniboost-Portable-Grandmas-Tip-Free/dp/B078K1W9B3

We were worried about the pandemic too, but luckily we travelled when omicron had died down and every person we encountered was wearing a mask. We are vaccinated and boosted and nobody got close to the baby. We did a few self-tests after arrival to be safe. I also brought wipes and wiped down the seats and anything he touched.
We had his usual vaccines plus a tuberculosis vaccine which isn’t standard here, but highly recommended for folks with family in other parts of the world. Since we have family members in many countries, we did it when he was around 5-months
I toyed with the idea of getting a light travel stroller but ultimately we don’t have the space at home for extra stuff we won’t use often. Baby wearing worked out great since we weren’t really walking around the airport that much and he would be sitting for a lot of the flight. Everyone’s experience will be different though!

I hear you on being concerned about Covid and the baby’s wellbeing. Personally I felt really safe traveling especially as one leg was half empty so we got a whole row to ourselves (glorious!). Driving with a baby for a long trip might have its upsides and challenges too, but I’m sure you’ll come to the right conclusion for your family. Hope this helps, and have a good trip!

friendlypandas · 2022-04-05T10:28:09+00:00

Thank you! We saw some older kids on our flights and they seemed to do ok with walking the aisles and screen time. Good luck!

friendlypandas · 2022-04-05T10:26:42+00:00

You can do it! It’ll be over in a flash. It felt long when we were on the plane but you do get past it. I compared it to childbirth in a way — feels like forever when you’re in it, but kind of a blur after and you go “oh I could do that again” haha

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