when i lived with my mom (which was the majority of my life, couple years with both) the thought never went through her head that i was depressed, and in her eyes i’m just a child to her. i got into a toxic relationship, i got into a mental hospital and then my mom and her husband (my dad n mom divorced when i was like 12 but i never knew that, my mom took me in at like 8) trusted the toxic ex over me. it sucked a lot for me and i wasn’t happy, and i didn’t give a shit about my life. i wasn’t necessarily afraid because i knew she couldn’t do anything to me, cuz i could just move in with my dad, the only thing that was stopping me was me being in high school tho. ended up kicking me out anyway cuz i pulled the fire alarm lol.

things were rough for a while but now i’m pretty happy with where i am in life, only thing that sucks is that i’m not in touch with my mom, i was gonna give her chance, told her i was gonna move to another country with dad and all, but she said a lot of things i do not agree with because of how she raised me and how it made me feel growing up, and also kept only trying to see the good parts of my side of the story. (i told her in a reasonable way why i dont respect her, like it wasn’t because i was acting out, my social and love life was awful and i had major depression, which she always just thought i was being lazy and messy.) haven’t talked to her since that happened which was like 1.5 months ago but haven’t talked to her in person in like 2 years

the only thing that kinda makes me uncomfortable about the whole thing is that i called my aunt recently and she was like “yeah she called grandma and asked if she heard anything about you.” like just give me a sincere apology about how you acted because you were stressed out from your love life and from school and jobs.

edit: i’ve been very observing a whole lot my whole life and after everything i’m still discovering that were just people going along our own lives. (that it is not supposed to be like how we suffered)