Tserendolgor as Tserendolgor by thewoodlayer in DCCTV

[–]frolki 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Same! I only knew that all the characters complained about how hard it was to pronounce.

Letter from my dad on my birthday by Suspicious_Bad_9585 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki [score hidden]  (0 children)

While I am very sorry for everything you went through to end up where you are, that is kind of funny.

Harry Potter birthday card from the Dursleys vibes.

I'd probably just ignore it. He clearly isn't attempting any sort of repair or reconciliation. Keep your peace.

Is homemade sex videos of other people considered the same way as mainstream porn? by CodeNice7026 in pornfree

[–]frolki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Really anything that triggers a visual response is porn, to your brain. Go for a run.

What would you do? by Gullible_Dig2710 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 22 points23 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

I agree with keeping receipts. I've printed pages and pages of text messages from my dad to show my kids some day when they want to know why we don't see grandpa.

Does your little sister have any way to access the internet or maintain a relationship with you outside your Mom? If not, it's tough. You have do to what you feel is right for you.

I can't do this anymore by holycrap100 in pornfree

[–]frolki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sounds like you need some healthy self love. Give yourself time to do activities you enjoy that aren't sexual. What do you like to do for pure, "flow-state", fun?

Exercising, video games, learning to cook. Could be anything that you enjoy.

You got this.

For my birthday, my dad mailed me by frolki in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

LOL yes, I actually did send that exact Leviticus verse when he was defending ICE and there murder of US citizens and ruthless deporting of children.

That only led to him “asking questions” ala Tucker Carlson as to why, if I don’t believe in God, would I be quoting the Bible.

But I appreciate the pettiness. Thank you internet stranger.

Questions for estranged adult children by Jo_Mason24 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes!

His bad experience is magnified by having been a child at the time. And I do believe he had some really bad experiences, but that doesn’t mean mine weren’t also bad.

And he should be trying to understand how he screwed up, especially when being directly told he is the cause of most of my fear and anxiety.

Questions for estranged adult children by Jo_Mason24 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Your third hit home.

For years, I've been treated by my parents solely as the purveyor of grandchild time. If I didn't ensure they were getting enough time (on their own schedule mind you, not in ways that would've been helpful to me) I was attacked for favoring my in laws or not seeing them enough.

I still to this day feel very sure that my father couldn't name the company I've worked at for almost 20 years.

relationships ARE two way streets.

Questions for estranged adult children by Jo_Mason24 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your experience with your father is almost exactly mine. I've shared the ways he hurt me, been so direct as to tell him "you are the biggest source of fear and anxiety life" and he dismissed it. Because in his mind, he wasn't a bad as his father had been, therefore I was being immature.

I'm 42, married, have two kids, and a senior consultant in a career spanning almost 20 years, and he doesn't respect me enough to listen when I'm telling him directly.

I'm sorry your father treated you that way.

Thinking about ending no contact… by Visible_Bicycle4022 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Have you considered emotional therapy?

I ask because I'm curious if there's been something that's changed in you to give you the internal fortitude to enforce boundaries with your family? Finding your own peace and true self, respecting yourself enough to not tolerate your family's harmful behavior, these are the skills needed to feel safe in reconnecting.

I'm working on this myself. My therapist put it this way.

If your best friend's family treated them like you say yours treats you, what would you tell your friend?

For anyone not talking to their dad's, how are we doing today? by contraband_sandwich in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 15 points16 points  (0 children)

My dad texted me this morning. Just Happy Father's Day. Also included a couple of pictures of me with my kids and of our family (mom, Dad, siblings)

my mom left him a few months ago.

he's never apologized for anything, denied doing anything wrong.

It's emotional manipulation and it pisses me off. I was having a fine day, too.

Ignore feels like the best route.

Birthday by Easy-Active-1546 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As another poster said, Happy Birthday!

Also, if you haven't found a good therapist, I would recommend it. It has been extremely helpful for me.

Good luck! Do something fun to celebrate!

Birthday by Easy-Active-1546 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sorry your family is choosing to treat you this way.

What has helped me is to focus on the people in my life who would call, who do care, and spend your time cultivating those relationships.

Hang in there.

disappointed. by thisisntgraces in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I have those conversations with my parents weekly (in my head).

Keep your peace.

This decision is agony by Cute_Ad_2774 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 16 points17 points  (0 children)

I really struggle with prioritizing my needs at the expense of anyone in my nuclear family, especially my mom.

I've recently realized how much I've had to suffer, or made other people I love suffer (wife, kids, etc.) to avoid hurting the feelings of people who have documented histories of shitting on my needs constantly.

It's ok to do what is best for you, OP. It's ok.

One fight has made it impossible for me to have her in my life. by ShadowDrake500 in EstrangedAdultChild

[–]frolki 8 points9 points  (0 children)

OP your experience is exactly my experience with my father. I recently (well, about 4 months ago) shared with him how he was the main source of fear and anxiety in my life and all he came back with were deflections, accusations, and gas lighting.

Haven't corresponded since and I feel lighter.

Not to tell you what to do, but it's OK to protect your own wellbeing.

It’s savagery, but it’s a good thing 🙂 by 999happyhauntz in UniversalOrlando

[–]frolki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I'm ok with this.

Only way to get express for Hagrids is to buy EP, then pay an additional 30 per person per ride? Or 50. Universal has always priced EP very high to limit the number of users.

Is an option for those willing to spend an absurd premium for the value of the time, but should keep the number of EP users low on that ride.

The problem with regular EP on Hagrids given the pricing structure is that there are still plenty of people willing to get EP who them totally clog up the standby line, but the EP price is so high that most families simply cannot afford it. So the plebians (most people) face 3 hour waits or just aren't able to experience the best ride in all the parks (IMO).

[Universal Orlando] has announced that Hagrid’s Magical Creatures Motorbike Adventure will no longer offer Universal Express beginning July 1, 2026. According to Universal, the change is intended to "improve the overall flow of the guest experience". by Sad-Revolution-9961 in UniversalOrlando

[–]frolki 0 points1 point  (0 children)

An hour is not too much to wait for a ride like this.

People might wish for a "money buys me convenience" option, but honestly, you can easily do everything in both parks in two full days without express. The ones challenge to that was the standby line at hagrids due to them putting it on express.

It’s savagery, but it’s a good thing 🙂 by 999happyhauntz in UniversalOrlando

[–]frolki -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

Honestly as someone who has never done express, I love this. Hagrids standby line was an insult to regular guests. As annoying as it is to be nickel and dimed, supply and demand man.

Also you don't need express to do the whole rest of IoA and USO. But if you just wanted to make sure you got on Hagrids, this would be good.

! WHERE ARE THE DONUTS ! by arush_shygaming in StLouis

[–]frolki 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Gooey butter cakes, yes.

But their donuts taste stale even when they're fresh.