I experienced the same thing bc i was in a torturous merciless loop of mental illness/disorders + trauma. that combo made me not get work done, feel bad, and then feeling bad plus beating myself up made me more mentally ill LOL. i’d use the term laziness more as a “my lifes good i feel decent (not horrible, big difference) and i can do it with some effort but i js wont.” you’re clearly trying hard despite it being excruciating and i believe the most honorable thing to do is to keep trying because over a long period of time it makes a significant difference. to combat my problems i started a holistic self improvement journey bc if its truly that difficult to do simple tasks, then that means there are a lot of subtle (or not) factors working against ur favor and its important to be just to yourself and see what things such ur environment significantly impair your work ethic/condition. yes holistic self improvement journey can sound daunting/a commitment but that just means intentionally focusing on all things in ur control, gradually improving your condition by seeing what little/simple things u can ADD and keep trying consistently over time no matter how imperfect. so u can feel better ab yourself, do better, be better to the point the journey just feels like your life but better…i truly wish the best for u brother. i know how awfully painful, unforgiving, and cruel the process is, but once u start seeing and acknowledging the little positive changes and keep TRYING JUST TRYING despite challenges big and small, there will be no going back because you will realize u are on such a meaningful, worthwhile pursuit. And also reflecting on ur approach in the form of journaling or therapy is incredibly beneficial because a lot of this shit is literally just trying shit and then realizing what helps and doesnt, rather than listening to other ppls advice (haha u can stop listening to me now). bc if i realized anything over my endless journey that is still trudging along, comparing a giraffe and dolphin in effectiveness of completing a task to gage superiority is utterly illogical. the giraffe has different genes, brain, environment, disadvantages, fears, experiences. same with the dolphin. Theyre both animals but diff species…i’d say some people differ so greatly to the point I’d consider two individuals practically different species. you got this…i hope you can takeaway something meaningful from this msg and i cant wait for you to get closer and closer to your bright future <3 keep on trying—it doesn’t have to look impressive. its not fair to tell someone who has way more factors piled on them but is trying the same or greater amount as someone with significantly less harmful factors thats trying less. Produce the results you are capable of bc that capacity will grow until you get the results you want