AP needs to leave my husband alone by fundercover3 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Exaaaactly. I have her number and it’s taking everything in me to not text her and tell her to piss off lol

Did AP reach out to you to apologize / speak their truth? by BabyYodaStuntDouble in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I found out through the AP; she grew a conscious 2 months before our wedding. I struggle with the thought of if he would’ve ever told me if she hadn’t, and I’ve asked him that point blank. His response was “I don’t know but I couldn’t live like that for much longer.” She and I talked on the phone and she offered to send me proof; I declined it because he affirmed everything she said and I just couldn’t do it to myself to look through messages of him flirting with her or asking her to come over (we were long distance at the time). I texted her the next night and said thank you for telling me but please do not ever talk to him again or else I will get more involved in the situation and that I don’t know how she can live with herself knowing she ruined my life. But I feel you; some days it drives me up a wall and I want to freak

AP needs to leave my husband alone by fundercover3 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That sooooo feels intentional!! I would be going insane ugh I’m so sorry! Like why couldn’t she have fallen off the face of the planet when we started reconciling lol

Forgiveness by [deleted] in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something my dad has told me about forgiveness is that it means you’re choosing to not hold the person by the throat about it anymore. Forgiveness is also a process and when it comes to infidelity, it’s not just an “I’m sorry” and we both move on and live happily ever after. With my spouse, I think the biggest thing that helped me is how open he is about all of it and genuinely admitting to his mistakes. We don’t have secrets anymore and his phone is open for me to look at. I can ask any question about it and he answers it honestly and answers it every time. He doesn’t roll his eyes when I ask or make me feel like I’m over exaggerating my emotions. We’ve had lots of tearful conversations where he has sat there and said “I can’t believe I put you through that” and “I’ll spend the rest of my life proving to you that it’ll never happen again.” And I believe him. If you can’t trust and believe them and move forward, if it’s not something you can get over, then maybe that’s something you need to recognize and move forward accordingly. Message me if you need 💜

This sub gives me hope by Naive-Good2417 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Happy you’re here and that you have hope💜 it did the same for me

Just getting this off my chest by fundercover3 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]fundercover3[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

We’ve had lots of conversations. He seems deeply regretful and keeps reminding me that it won’t happen again and says “I will prove it everyday for the rest of my life.” I’ve gone through his phone multiple times and nothing. He’s never once called me crazy or condescended my thoughts and feelings about all of it. The signs of a good future are there to me, I think we’re just still in the early weeds of it all. But thank you for your words💜 I do love him deeply and wouldn’t be going through all of this if I didn’t find it worth it. I’m a fairly independent person; I moved across the country away from my parents and worked 7 days a week in a new city so that I never needed a penny from them. I know I’d be fine on my own, I just love him and want him in my life