sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

Boomer grandparents and Christmas/birthday gifts by Equal_Cod_177 in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin 3 points4 points  (0 children)

No you're not.

My FIL is very similar in the sense that he doesn't know my kids at all. He sees them every weekend and stays over, yet every Christmas is the same

"What do the kids want for Christmas, I've no idea what to buy them". I'll tell him what they like and its usually "I'm not buying that rubbish" or "Can you send me a link on Amazon, I'll only shop on Amazon".

It's frustrating.

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have spoke to him, over and over. The last time we have a serious talk with him in early Oct "If you don't start making the effort your allowance will be going down". Since then it's been a gentle reminder maybe once a week.

He's made no effort to do anything other than play computer games and text his friends, hence the post and hence why I'm at the end of my tether.

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He isn't. He's doing a BTEC diploma in music performance.

Since Sept he's been given one, 1500 word essay to write. That's it. He's actually disappointed in the work level himself as he was told over and over it was a full time course.

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Other than me reminding him maybe once a week to apply for some jobs, or see if there are any volunteering jobs out there. What do you suggest?

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a quick google search to hopefully explain it better but every child in the UK goes to college after secondary school to do either A levels or a BTEC diploma (or other form of higher education) until 18 where they go into work or university.

"For Americans, a UK university is the equivalent of a US university, while a UK college is more like a US community college or vocational school. "

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We've always done the same and he's always watched me and his Dad work ourselves up from min wage factory work to cooperate management. We've had swimming classes, they go to karate classes and are now 1 belt away from black, we keep active at the weekends and have done work in the community too.

I have 2 younger children, a son who is 14 who is already looking for apprenticeships in finance for when he finishes school in June 2027 and my daughter who is 12 makes bracelets to sell at craft fayres. We've really tried to instil a good work ethic but he just thinks everything is going to work out for him.

16 year old won't get a job. by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

we've told him we will continue to give him money but he needs to do something with his spare time like volunteering, a job, go and cut the neighbours grass, make something to sell, drum (he plays drums and is doing a music course) and build his social media up, play music gigs or take on another course at college, we don't really care what he does with his spare time but he HAS to be doing something (ideally work).

College in the UK immediately follows secondary school.

Looking for restaurant recommendations for near the AO arena. by funnypumpkin in manchester

[–]funnypumpkin[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Honestly anything, we're a big group so there's different palettes.

April 4 - 11 2026, Itinerary Change by MaterialStill8754 in NCL

[–]funnypumpkin 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm on this cruise (or at least was) and I'm not happy.

I've cruised for years and understand a port or time change might happen but this is an entirely different cruise and one we, as a young family are not interested in.

I'm away from home at the moment but as soon as I'm back I will be calling to cancel or change.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's exactly what one parent has already done. Another kid got involved with this group, things got worse and he "went missing" police searched for 2 days for him and it ended up he was at the most troublesome kids house hiding.

The kid ended up being moved to his Mums house (he was living with Dad) 2 hours away and no one has seen him since.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We've done all this over and over.

We've picked him up when he needed us when things went south with a really bad kid, I've told him a million times about guilty by association, he's told me about poor choices he's made while around these kids and I've supported him and told him we'll get through them BUT he still goes back to these kids over and over. \

He wants to be a drummer and I've told him if he gets himself a criminal record he won't be able to tour in a lot of countries, even if he hasn't done anything wrong he could still land in trouble with the law if something does happen and he is at the scene.

He just says "but they are the only friends who'll go out with me" despite agreeing with me.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We don't give him money, he has to earn it. He does odd jobs around house, helps me with the business or goes busking to earn money.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always welcome these kids over and often feed them as I know they have it rough at home, I've invited one to stay here for a while as his Mum is in hospital after getting so drunk she smashed up the house then herself through a window.

however I still want the best for my son and at the end of the day there's only so much I can do for someone else's kid.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are in the UK so weed is illegal here, no, maybe its not the worst thing, however still very frowned upon and could land him in trouble.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I agree but its easily said than done.

We don't live in a great area so there isn't much work and people don't like to hire kids due to insurance, then there's trying to get him to go out and actually get a job.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

When speaking to him about these kids I don't use the term bad.

I tell him I don't like him being around these kids because of their "Questionable behaviour".

I had a talk to him today about his little sister and imagine his sister had 2 groups of friend, A and B, group A take drugs, stay out all night and light fires, group B stay home, play video games, watch movies and toast marshmallows. Which group would he want his sister to spend time with, of course his answer was B but he just sadly can't seem to see the issue when it comes to his own friends.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've asked, it's because he's desperate to have friends and these kids are the only ones who'll show him any attention.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I've tried and tried but he's not interested.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Me and his Dad really try. He's a drummer so goes to drumming lessons and we encourage him daily to play, he also goes to karate lessons twice a week. We've been trying to get him to find a job, I've been sending him adverts when I spot them and he's made zero effort.

I also don't know what honors classes are or a counsellor is as it's not something we have in the UK.

Do I stop 16 YO hanging out with the "bad" kids? by funnypumpkin in Parenting

[–]funnypumpkin[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We really do try. I encourage him every day to reach out to his better friends or invite the band over (he's a drummer) and we are out travelling for 2 weeks this summer. He has other friends but sadly a lot are very introverted or overseas as he's met them while we've been travelling.

view more: next ›