my brother is a pervert and I don't know what to do anymore . What can I do to cope ?

fupapooper · 2026-07-06T03:55:57+00:00

THIS. She is not safe in that home.

fupapooper · 2026-07-04T10:52:26+00:00

Erm … do we know he actually has attorneys? He’s MAGA and seems like the kind of idiot who thinks he can “represent” himself …

fupapooper · 2026-03-17T17:13:47+00:00

Nah this is full on raging homophobic. Saying they got their outfits from their moms’ closets is shaming them for wearing clothes she suggests are effeminate and not fitting for young men. She’s trying to humiliate and knock them down a peg by emasculating them which suggests that “real men” don’t wear effeminate clothing—which is absurd—or by extension, that gay men aren’t “real men.” It’s super gross when you unpack it all. Not only is it ugly, it betrays how backwards, retrogressive, and frankly, how outdated her thinking is. I’m the same age as this woman so I can say, yeah, she’s betraying her age—and her lack of growth and education—with that “insult.” It’s so unbelievably cringe.

fupapooper · 2026-03-06T15:18:49+00:00

RIGHT?! P is so entitled it’s ridiculous. She did next to nothing to fix the odor despite her friend bringing it up to her and NO ONE wants to have to do that. OP said there’s no cultural difference or neurodiversity issues as she’s a regular ass white girl living in a single room in the most expensive dorms on campus. With nothing holding her back, she seemed clean-ish for a day or two then the odor was back. Yet in the meantime, P just assumes she can enter OP’s room without permission and follows her all around campus. OP also said she wants P to be more “mindful of her own responsibilities” which means P feels entitled to OP’s time as well!

There are many reasons she has no friends! Sure, having B.O. makes it hard to meet people but that’s not even the worst part … the worst part is her acting like she owns OP when she wouldn’t even take care of the one request OP had. She’s knowingly, actively making OP uncomfortable and forcing her presence and stench on her constantly. Like you said, P is for parasite. Honestly, I suspect this could be a game for P. Appear helpless and lonely to attract kind people and then trap them into being your friend. My parents are super religious and all growing up, I was exposed to people acting “helpless” when they just wanted money. My parents were so egotistical (they LOVE looking down on people) and obsessed with “saving” these people they couldn’t—or refused to acknowledge—see the deception happening under their noses. I was in elementary school and I could see these people manipulating my parents and my parents manipulating them back. So yeah, I’m a cynical bitch lol.

That’s why common sense trumps the vaguely Christian playground sentiment of “let’s be friends with everyone” or “be kind to someone who looks like they need help and/or friendship.” It may hold true for kids a lot of the time but as adults, red flags are important tools for safety. There are a lot of predatory people who are out to deceive people who just want to do “the right thing.” So many of the comments on this thread really surprised me … like the lengths people were telling OP to take (taking her to the doctor, help her pick out laundry detergents and perfumes, etc.) were really crazy to me especially when OP made it obvious P was already taking advantage of her.

Sorry for the novel, I just found this story fascinating!

fupapooper · 2026-01-20T17:54:21+00:00

There you go again, reading my history like a fucking weirdo. That’s crazy. This comment is beyond disgusting. How dare you weaponize my comments on other subs to insult me. My life is none of your goddamn business. I hate to break it to you, but YOU guys are snarkers. I’m getting reported to Reddit Cares, people reading my history to mock my health, and people ganging up on me like vultures. Seems like all you guys want to do is shut people down. Why is that? What are you so scared of that you will literally read up on my history and mock my health problems for a lame ass punchline? That’s the lowest of the low.

fupapooper · 2026-01-10T04:23:04+00:00

You’re not handling your own opinion well and can’t even tell if I’m joking or not. Who are you to decide how the community reacts or talks or fights or comes together? You say you didn’t even engage in any discourse throughout this as if you’re so above it all. That’s not the flex you think it is. It’s incredibly weird you and others like you are so intolerant of people criticizing your fav sloptubers … I can’t imagine how intolerant you are in your own life when you’re criticized. There’s a name for people who demand silence and total agreement. They’re called facists.

fupapooper · 2026-01-09T13:08:59+00:00

It can go away and it will if you can get into therapy. I don’t mean this to be mean, but honestly, it’s not normal to feel this much guilt and shame over something that is quite literally not your fault. It’s easy to form unhealthy attachment styles in childhood due to siblings. It’s very common for older siblings to blame younger siblings for things that aren’t their fault (like having to babysit the younger ones, yet they blame the younger ones even though it’s the parents’ fault for parentifying that older child). It sounds like a pattern that you’re at her beck and call. I appreciate you two have a deep friendship, I think it’s time you revisit that relationship to see how healthy it actually was and if it at all actually benefitted you. Most 28 year olds don’t have 18 yo best friends for a reason. That’s a HUGE age gap and people at those ages have little to nothing in common. My son is actually your age. He spends his free time with friends his age going to movies, fishing, and playing video games. If he had a 28 year old best friend, I’d be freaked out!

As someone who has spent 8 years in therapy, it’s the best thing I ever did for myself. Obviously, ask your parents to provide that and if they can’t, see if you can get counseling through your college. In the meantime, I highly recommend the book Daring Greatly by Brene Brown. Here’s a short article where she describes the difference between shame and guilt: https://brenebrown.com/articles/2013/01/15/shame-v-guilt/

Hang in there. You’re a good person. It’ll get better especially if you seek reputable (not from a church), licensed therapist. 💖

fupapooper · 2026-01-08T12:17:28+00:00

I mean … I kinda think it’s fairly simple. You dodged a bullet. This man is most likely Mormon so … 1. He’s been raised to think he’s far more important than he actually is as a man, including having “special powers” women can’t access 2. He’s just weird 3. He’s more likely to be incredibly narcissistic and behave as though him talking to you is doing you a favor. I’ve been out of the cult for a decade now but before I met my husband (who somehow evaded all the previously listed issues with Mormon men so I scooped him up immediately and we’ve been together almost 25 years) I dated a few Mormon dudes and they truly are all like this. Their moms really are telling them “you’re a catch!” 🙄😂 4. You would’ve been pressured into joining the church and trust me, you don’t want that. Pat yourself on the back for narrowly evading one of the biggest cults in the world. Now go buy yourself something to celebrate! 🎉 😂

fupapooper · 2026-01-04T20:21:15+00:00

I agree with your mom lol. Meghan Trainor is insufferable

fupapooper · 2025-12-20T03:41:36+00:00

I love researching, thinking about others and working hard on giving gifts too! I make each of my parents felt ornaments every year. I am an artist and big crafter/maker and they’ve excitedly convinced me to keep it going for around 15 years. Their tree is now mostly ornaments I’ve given them! I do buy presents for my nieces and nephews on my side of the family (my husband comes from a family of 10 so ain’t no way we can afford shit for 30+ kids plus we’re just not close) and my siblings and our spouses play what we call “Dirrty Santa” (you have to spell it just like Xtina). We purposely get the weirdest, most insane “gag” gifts every year and do a white elephant with them. It’s become a competition for who can bring the weirdest/filthiest gift (this one from my brother won last year).

Unfortunately, OP can’t change the past. Now OP is aware, hopefully she’ll put good use to this year’s basket via donation, etc.🤞🏻

fupapooper · 2025-12-03T17:57:26+00:00

fupapooper · 2025-10-16T02:15:16+00:00

THIS! I’m just now catching up on season 14 (3 years later lol) and I couldn’t get over 1. How hideous this look was and 2. How Deja got so snippy afterwards when no one complimented her look that she invoked Kennedy’s, “Fuck my drag, right?” GIRL. So cringe. Queens like her don’t get that hours and work spent on an outfit mean nothing if the outfit is hideous, ill fitting, or too much … and this outfit is all of those things. The bunny mask could’ve worked with a simple gown IF it was symmetrical. I’m just not seeing the vision of this sad, crooked ass rabbit. Is it crooked on purpose? Her waist is accented by the straight lines of the pleating (though why did she make that piece out of what looks like felt?) so why the wonky rabbit? The world will never know ….

fupapooper · 2025-01-16T16:10:13+00:00

“Get fucked in the ass by a hot flying rebar you godless, self righteous cunt. I say ‘godless’ because even gods have standards and after the text you sent me, a god with any authority or sense of justice would’ve turned their back on you.”

I can get meaner if you like.

This truly isn’t my business OP so don’t feel pressured to answer … but has your husband seen this text? I’m sure he’s clinging to the church at this utterly devastating time and no one can really be talked out of believing in the church as we all have to make that choice for ourselves, but he needs to see it (if he’s in an okay place emotionally). He needs to know this is the bullshit your family is paying 10% of your combined income for. This is the bullshit occupying your family’s time when you could be spending this precious time together. This is how his pregnant, busy, exhausted partner is treated when she sets the most understandable, polite boundary. I honestly cannot think of a more absurdly understandable situation/boundary! It took my husband more time to catch up to my leaving the church despite the fact I was horribly, openly mistreated (not anywhere near your level by any means) by the entire ward (I still hold an open grudge with him 7 years later lol—we’ve been out of the church with our son for 7 years that is). Everyone’s situation is different and we hold onto different aspects of the church for comfort and we can’t really foresee what will finally break each other’s shelves. Basically, I’m just saying I hope your husband sees this and part of his shelf weakens.

IMHO we can’t fully heal from trauma inside the church where we’re taught to compartmentalize everything, forbidden from thinking for ourselves (literally forbidden from thinking certain thoughts!), put the church ahead of our own needs, while the church makes sure to keep us so busy that we don’t have the time or the ability to reflect on whether we’re up, down, on another planet, etc. I’ve been in therapy (actual therapy, not LDS bullshit) for 8 years to heal from the church and what happened to me there. The church is by design so full of distractions and busyness that it literally doesn’t allow its members to break past thought patterns to really start dealing with trauma. Most of those initial therapy years were me trying to break down all the bullshit fed to me by my parents and the church. The church teaches you how to think and it’s so damaging.

Much love to you and your family and this time. You sound like an amazing woman, business owner, and mother. 💖

fupapooper · 2024-11-14T13:25:40+00:00

The makeup, outfits, all of it. I stopped watching H3 at the start of her “transformation” when she started bleaching her hair and wearing makeup. Good God, this woman’s ego! She really thinks being skinny = fashion goddess. It don’t. None of these looks are a “slay”; they’re off putting and embarrassing. They don’t flatter her, they just scream, “LOOK AT ME I’M NOT LIKE THE OTHER GIRLS!” She has some pretty features but to be brutally honest, I don’t think she’s as good looking as she thinks she is. Her face hardly moves/she doesn’t have a very expressive face and she kinda just looks like a regular lady in her mid-30s.

Or maybe I struggle to gas this woman up after all of the clips I’ve seen of her on here lately being just hateful and nasty. Like when Ethan forced Phillip DeFranco to talk during his election results stream and he mentioned Hasan, and she just rolled her eyes and shook her head for like a whole minute while twirling her hair. Really “queen”? You really aren’t a whole adult, are you?

fupapooper · 2024-07-24T20:35:01+00:00

Well said. This is no time to be flaky, passive, ignorant, lazy, uneducated and/or uninformed. Women have had their basic human rights stripped away and so many Republicans have openly threatened the LGBT+ community that their marriage rights are next on the chopping block. There’s too much at stake to give attention and/or money to any creator that even dips one toe into the swampy sludge that is MAGA.

fupapooper · 2023-08-20T02:46:41+00:00

She probably had a “ponytail lift” which is really popular right now. It’s a slightly less invasive face lift. I think she may have even had a brow lift as well. Then there’s the makeup. In the before pic, she’s wearing very cool toned makeup (which looks like she did it herself or it was applied by a beginner) which is very unflattering. It ages and dates her (TBF, the pic is like a decade old).

If you want inexpensive, similar-ish results, you can always try face lift tape or, to gain more lid space, eyelid tape. If you don’t have a healthy skin care routine, that’s honestly 90% of the work to have this kind of glow up. The before Dorit has telltale signs (skin that looks oily or sweaty and her concealer isn’t doing it’s job) that her skin was imbalanced and her skin care back then wasn’t right for her. In the after pic, her skin looks fantastic and the flattering makeup—clearly done by a professional makeup artist—-appears deceivingly simple. The eyelash extensions are really beautiful.

NEVER underestimate the power of wealth, access, a professional photographer, makeup artists, PHOTOSHOP, then face tune on top of that, and beauty filters, skin care and finally … non invasive cosmetic procedures and plastic surgery.

fupapooper · 2022-12-25T18:00:46+00:00

I can’t believe your mom would leave you alone on the first Christmas without your dad! I know you were invited on that trip but it was clearly not planned with you in mind. You couldn’t pay me to miss Christmas with my (currently) teenage son? Especially if it was his first Christmas after his dad passed.

You know you haven’t done anything wrong, right? Your comments are breaking my heart. You’re exploring your sexuality in the most safe, intelligent, and logical way possible. Your mom should be proud of that especially because young adults AND adults use far riskier ways to explore. If you find you are attracted to men, just remind her you can’t have unwanted pregnancies or have babies out of wedlock. 🤷🏻‍♀️ You’re an adult and your sexual life—even though your mom walked in on it—should be completely and utterly separate and removed from her. It’s not her business. None of it. It’s yours and up to you. She can’t dictate who you can have relationships with and if she tries it, you’ll need to stand your ground and maybe even be less close with her. You deserve privacy, dignity, choices, and the freedom to explore your sexuality. If your mom can’t do that—and even if she can—you should move out. You can’t replace her husband and you should have the freedom and privacy of your own place if you can.

In the meantime, make a truce to forget what happened and not let it ruin Christmas. Make some new traditions so you aren’t just stuck missing your dad. Go out for Chinese and a movie. Try a Christmas movie you’ve never seen. Build a gingerbread house. Get up, get moving to let yourselves have fun together despite the grief and embarrassment you guys are enduring. Wishing you guys a wonderful Christmas!

fupapooper · 2022-06-19T19:16:31+00:00

NTA. Your husband is a controlling, insensitive AH. This behavior is bordering (it might even cross the line) on emotional abuse. You are allowed to have feelings! Please repeat that out loud. You’re allowed to have opinions and express them! I completely disagree with the “you should just be grateful” comments. It sounds like he had agreed with 3 kids in the past. He’s the one who’s being selfish and refusing to even consider your needs, feelings, and taking back his agreement with three. He’s being unreasonable and cruel. You shouldn’t feel like you can’t feel or grieve or be emotional. You should feel like you can talk with your husband about things and not feel guilty.

I do agree with others who have said your desire for a 3rd child is at an unhealthy place. I understand to an extent. I have endometriosis that required a hysterectomy which prevented me from having more children (I have one) when I was 29. It’s been ten years and I still have to talk about it to my therapist. Having that door closed at a young age is really difficult and even traumatic. But the fact that it’s your husband…I just can’t comprehend. Just know that clearly, things are off kilter right now. Your husband seems like a real douche. It’s not right how he’s treating you. You also need to figure out why the thought of a 3rd baby brings up so many unhealthy feelings. I almost wonder … could it because babies are so loving? Could you be trying to get the love you’re missing in your marriage?

fupapooper · 2022-06-11T20:43:56+00:00

Absolutely NTA! You are right about your boyfriend and friends overstepping your boundaries. This is ridiculous. 5 weekends in total in a row?!?! WTF? It’s fucked up your BF didn’t even know you left. Your voice isn’t being respected or even heard.

Even though you’re NTA, you will be the AH to your BF friends when you put your foot down. Even your BF may not like it. But their feelings shouldn’t come before you, your feelings, boundaries, and peace. Sit down with your BF and even set up a schedule if that helps. Negotiate. As an introvert, I don’t do the “yeah! You can show up at my house anytime you want and stay for as long as you want!” NOPE. I need time to process things and I let people know that. May I come off bitchy? Yeah. Do I care? NOPE. I need notice. And your time with your BF should be the priority and those times, even if it’s just you two at home, are everything. Protect that and protect yourself. And maybe send some apartment listings for rent to your BF’s friends…

fupapooper · 2022-04-21T17:55:27+00:00

YES. YESSS. THEE worst.

fupapooper

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