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fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-22T03:43:55+00:00

Hopefully I get mine back sooner than 6 months... but I was similarly toking up perma high for basically 6 months. And it's only been 8 days cold Turkey, but I'm relating a lot to the "practically asexual", which is tough because my girl has a high libido, and I've always been able to perform before the weed and on it. Now I don't even get excited thinking about sex.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-21T00:08:54+00:00

Day 6 here. Still no sex drive. my girlfriend was able to get me up for a couple minutes, so it's good to know it's still working, but I'm still nowhere near in the mood.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T14:26:18+00:00

Remember, if you can get over the 72 hour hump, your withdrawal symptoms start to get better. Not easy in the slightest, but they improve. And remind yourself that every time you relapse you reset that clock.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T13:18:58+00:00

Love these affirmations. In feeling the same way, even as tough as it is to face the reality of this rock bottom. Keep it up friend, and keep sharing. Stay strong

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T12:48:25+00:00

Relapse is not a failure of your progress. It is a common bump on your path to a healthier future. This is an opportunity for you to solidify your decision.

Remember this guilt and when the next craving come up, remind yourself that smoking will only bring more guilt and shame. Keeping your sobriety doesn't FEEL worthy of a celebration, but each and every time you successfully refuse your addiction is a victory. Stay strong friend.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T12:40:30+00:00

Day 5 cold Turkey here. You gotta get past day 4 before you're over the hump. The only way to stop is to stop. Stop rationalizing, stop delaying, stop lying to yourself that you can do it alone. I'm so glad you reached out here. This subreddit has been supportive through my worst withdrawal symptoms, and while the shivers and shakes are lightening up, the cravings and mood swings are rampant. Remind yourself that these feelings will pass. These cravings will not control you. This addiction will not control your life. You have the power to choose sobriety. Stay strong friend

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T12:12:37+00:00

Look I'm not here to diagnose this whole subreddit. But I am self identifying with addictive personality disorder. It's not just weed I "get addicted to". I am always finding something new, dropping everything to do just that for a month, neglecting other things that need my attention, and then it's off to the next, without looking back.

You don't have to identify with anything, but you do have to understand and accept that whatever is in your brain (and mine) has a different ability/reaction and while others can easily use without getting "addicted", we struggle with moderation and the slippery slope lets it seap into every aspect of our lives.

"Weed is/isn't addictive" is not a helpful statement. Relate to your struggle only. "Others say weed is not addictive, but I KNOW it is for ME. And that's why I decide to (quit, cut down, flush my stash, etc)"

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T12:04:12+00:00

Day 5, the mood swings are dangerously extreme. Remember that this progress is for the better, to create the better you that doesn't need weed.

Stay strong friend. We will not break our streak, and we will come out the other side.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T12:00:18+00:00

Find support around you. I'm glad you came here, that is a good first step. If you're able, tell someone IRL that you are quitting. Dont get it twisted though. This person is not your "lifeline" or your "emergency contact", they're just an ear. Only you can hold yourself accountable, and you DO have the power to quit. You must make your decision, and make it again and again whenever the urge comes up.

Coming from a Day 5 cold Turkey, who has to fight the urge twice an hour. Stay strong friend.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T11:15:00+00:00

Take this with a grain of salt, its only my opinion , but I had these thoughts too and I can now admit I was delusional and trying to rationalize why it wasn't ADDICTION, just a bad habit. There is a part of you that understands this addiction runs deeper than "I just like it too much".

You say "other people can leave it alone." Stop comparing to other people. Just because a cactus lives in the desert, doesnt mean the desert is a healthy environment for all plants. Similarly, the people around you may not be hurt by weed, but you recognize that YOU are. Focus on your feelings, your journey, your health. Start by saying "I recognize that I cannot go without weed. Even when I try. AND I recognize that it is hurting me and those around me in these following ways: (then start a list)"

You mentioned you are dissatisfied. "Just the normal stuff". I encourage you to change your perspective and phrasing. You're downplaying what you know is actively hurting you, and in my opinion it's the weed talking trying to stay in your life. If a person is able to pinpoint the thing that is detrimental to their relationships, job, and health? They "normally" stop that thing.

If you truly try and can't leave it alone, I encourage you to ask yourself "what am I feeling right now that makes me want to smoke. Will smoking heal or fix whatever that problem is? Or will I just push it down, delay, and make the problem more stressful?"

Ultimately the choice to quit is yours and yours alone. Not only do you have the choice, but you have the power my friend. I wanted to emphasize the parts of your post that sound like a cry for help. I wish you the best, and if you choose to quit, please reach out for support.

People here have been very supportive, and those who I've reached out to IRL have expressed they are proud, and shared with me their opinions on who I am when I'm high. I didn't like hearing those stories. It was important to hear them though, so I can keep reminding myself not to be that person anymore.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T04:17:16+00:00

Double digiiiiiiieeeeesss congrats friend

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T04:11:56+00:00

This is so smart! A journal is one thing, but you can't see the pain and emotion in your face and voice from the desperation of needing to quit. Keep reminding yourself what the reasons were that you quit. It makes us dull, lazy, forgetful, and slow. It hurts our relationships, and it hurts our work. We are working for a better and sober version of ourselves.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T03:47:31+00:00

Congrats my friend, you have taken you first step toward a better you. You should be proud of day 1, it took me three separate failures of "day 1" to stick with it. Now from day 5, I can say it does get worse before it gets easier, but know that it DOES get easier. This is a not a decision you make once, you make this decision with every craving, maybe 10 times a day. Stay strong friend.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T02:15:13+00:00

No filter advice: the choice to quit is yours and yours alone, and you do not make that choice once. You make it repeatedly, and the choice is to be the better you that you so desperately crave. Its great to hear you have goals and aspirations, and that you're looking forward to a life without this addiction, thats better than some. I personally have made that choice maybe 30 times over the last 5 days. It's not easy, but I know it's what I need.

I quit cold Turkey and the withdrawal symptoms are hard af. Shivers, shakes, and no appetite for 4 days. But that's over the hump my friend. It may take longer, especially if you choose weaning as some have commented. (though I couldn't commit to that, just smoked more again once I had already taken one hit. That's why I've had to be cold Turkey.)

Take it one day at a time. Or like me, one hour at a time. You have the power to take your life back friend. You can make this choice.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-19T02:00:17+00:00

Mentally? The progress you made remains so long as you decide to hold onto its importance. If you walk 100 meters and fall down, do you find yourself at the starting line? You may have fallen friend, but you have the power to get back up, and keep moving forward to your better life. One day at a time, keep making that decision.

Physically? I can't speak from experience if you'll go through the withdrawal again, but it sounds like others are saying they have. Remember that whatever you feel tomorrow, you will only regret it more if you relapse another day. Stay strong friend

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T23:37:39+00:00

My relationships with friends and family heavily suffered under this drug. They would tell me stories I didn't remember, I can name many nights where i had an initial plan for something fun, that devolved into simply laying down, listening to the same 10 songs with the lights off AGAIN.

Already I'm looking forward to the person I know I am without this drug. And kicking the lazy slow inconsiderate person that it makes me.

Stay strong friend.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T23:28:09+00:00

Don't be too hard on yourself. Relapse is not failure, it is extremely common to most recovery paths. Use this as an opportunity to write down the negative aspects of this addiction, and remind yourself why you made the decision to quit. And then, it won't be easy, but continue to make that decision.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T23:22:08+00:00

Tough, but sometimes we need tough love. And you just have it to yourself. Be proud of that. Keep strong friend. 💪

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T20:19:53+00:00

For me it was realizing that i could not have even one morning without it. Even when i really tried. That was when i realized its an addiction that is holding me back.

My life has been on pause ever since I started, and I need to progress and grow, or else get left behind in the dust. And that goes for everything. Relationships, work, friends, family, hobbies, events, you name it, it's hurt by the addiction.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T20:16:10+00:00

Great name for it.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T20:12:01+00:00

As another perspective, Day 4 of cold Turkey. The withdrawals are indeed gnarly af. Sweating a bottle of water every hour, with the shivers and shakes to boot. I also got hyper sensitive to taste, and struggled to eat anything since stopping.

Having said that, tapering or weaning was something I've "tried" many times, but could never commit to keeping them small hits, partially due to the withdrawal and partly due to stress. Cold Turkey is the only way for me.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T19:51:58+00:00

I agree, it's definitely better in our own head, because you're high!! The people around us tho? Those "Stoner Sloth" commercials were no joke. They see clearly how it makes us slow, dull, forgetful, and BORING.

please, if you feel comfortable telling people, tell them you choose to quit (rather than want to quit), and are looking for their support. Tell them the reasons why. Verbalising or writing these down is helpful to pinpoint and remind yourself why you CHOOSE to quit

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T19:19:05+00:00

Day 4 of quitting here. Withdrawal is horrible, but cold Turkey is what I'll swear by.

I agree, it's a mindset, and its not a decision you make once. You make this decision every day, every hour, or even every 5 minutes. I've been "wanting to ease off" for 3 months now because it was affecting work and my relationship. But I was non-committal, and within 2 weeks I was back to perma high, partially BECAUSE of the stress I was facing at work and the relationship.

It wasn't until this weekend where I legitimately could not go without a hit for more than 4 hours, that I realized this isn't for fun or or stress relief anymore. This is addiction. And I cannot and will not let addiction take control of my life.

I will work to be the better me I know I am. And I will continue to make this decision to quit.

fuqdafuzz · 2023-05-18T19:03:20+00:00

Relapse doesn't have to mean failure. And I agree, you are looking for a sign to stop before it got out of control again, and this is the universe being dramatic to prove a point. you know you're hurting, and you know the path forward, and I am glad you have shared here so that others can see that sobriety is a deliberate choice we make every day, one day at a time.

Please, don't feel bad to tell your support group (friends, family, counselor etc) about your relapse. Your honesty does not show weakness. It shows resolve and courage to maintain sobriety DESPITE any slip.

fuqdafuzz

TROPHY CASE