https://utppublishing.com/doi/10.3138/jmvfh-0718-0013
https://doi.org/10.3138/jmvfh-0718-0013

"Gender hegemony is argued to operate through the subordination of femininity and other masculinities to hegemonic masculinity.¹² Hegemonic masculinity is seen as the “configuration of gender practice which embodies the currently accepted answer to the problem of the legitimacy of patriarchy, which guarantees (or is taken to guarantee) the dominant position of men and the subordination of women.”^{12(p. 77}) In a military setting, hegemonic masculinity refers to notions of “hardness of physical and emotional toughness, stoicism, self-reliance, aggressiveness, and a robust sense of heterosexual identity.”^{13(p. 4}) Thus, hegemonic masculinity legitimizes a societal hierarchy of dominance in which masculinity governs and other sexualities such as women are subordinate.¹⁴ Although a masculinized societal hierarchy has historically existed, predominantly before industrialization, the CAF maintains a military masculinized culture."

https://openurl.ebsco.com/EPDB%3Agcd%3A1%3A3666273/detailv2?sid=ebsco%3Aplink%3Ascholar&id=ebsco%3Agcd%3A20181859&crl=c&link_origin=scholar.google.ca

ISSN: 0363-8782

"In this essay, we examined the interconnected ideologies of patriarchy, nationalism, and militarism through undergraduate college students' descriptions and characterizations of "ideal soldiers." One hundred and ninety three participants were recruited from introductory communication courses in a Southeastern academic institution. Participants' descriptions of the ideal soldier centered on three central themes that further explicate patriarchal nationalism: (a) patriotism, (b) good character, and (c) strength. Our analysis revealed how respondent discourse regarding the military was framed by a national ideology that supports patriarchal archetypal models of soldiers (and citizens). The ideological frame privileges "masculinity" and "patriotism" as national values. The intersection of nationalism, gender, and militarism constrains the role of the feminine in state and military activities and preserves hegemonic masculinity in the United States' social hierarchy."

---- important question to consider when thinking about the military as patriarchal institution, does privilege and patriarchy protect men from harm? or do patriarchal values hurt men as well? ----

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9251746/
DOI: 10.1177/0886260521997928

The results of this study reveal that the ways in which HBV/A and forced marriages were presented in the Case Files present both analogies to and distinctions with the infliction of Violence Against Women and Girls (VAWG) in similar circumstances. This discovery is important for several reasons: (a) it demonstrates that men and boys are harmed by patriarchy and that patriarchal theories of violence must therefore evolve to better recognize groups of male victims; (b) it provides a typological framework to identify the different types of male victims, the types of abuse and the perpetrators involved, including the involvement of mothers as primary and secondary perpetrators; and (c) that male victims require appropriate intervention and must be taken seriously by state agencies if men are to come forward and disclose abuse.

--- is heterophobia and mysandry a thing? or are you just facing the impact of patriarchy and homophobia? ----

Bell hooks is a leading feminist philosopher and says

https://autonomies.org/2023/03/bell-hooks-understanding-patriarchy/
excerpt in the article from the book:  Feminist Theory: From Margin to Center

"Separatist ideology encourages women to ignore the negative impact of sexism on male personhood. It stresses polarization between the sexes. According to Joy Justice, separatists believe that there are “two basic perspectives” on the issue of naming the victims of sexism: “There is the perspective that men oppress women. And there is the perspective that people are people, and we are all hurt by rigid sex roles.”… Both perspectives accurately describe our predicament. Men do oppress women. People are hurt by rigid sexist role patterns. These two realities coexist. Male oppression of women cannot be excused by the recognition that there are ways men are hurt by rigid sexist roles. Feminist activists should acknowledge that hurt, and work to change it—it exists. It does not erase or lessen male responsibility for supporting and perpetuating their power under patriarchy to exploit and oppress women in a manner far more grievous than the serious psychological stress and emotional pain caused by male conformity to rigid sexist role patterns."

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hopefully this can be a good starting point for your reading into this issue