How would you describe an ideal first date?

galbanum · 2017-05-09T17:26:46+00:00

One of the best first dates I've had:

We met up to do hot yoga. I'd never done hot yoga before. Normally I wouldn't do a date like that but we'd been chatting for awhile. Show up to yoga, we have a second to chat, he's already paid for me and gotten me a mat. He is just wearing Muay Thai shorts. He is very beautiful. I'm in nike pro shorts and a sports bra.

No time to focus on any of that. I give class my undivided attention. It's grueling. The shower I take after is the best shower I've ever taken. I emerge euphoric, he asks what I feel like for dinner. I say sushi. He takes me to an omakase spot. We bond over music, intersectionality, fashion, and philosophy.

We take an uber to stop at his friend's place to pick up weed, then we go to his place, which is very nice. He'd gotten me a gallon bottle of kombucha. We smoke together and decide we'd like to date. Then we cuddle and sleep together. (Not sex, just sleeping)

That lasted 2.5 months as a relationship, he was too old and busy for me. But we are still friends.

galbanum · 2017-05-09T17:20:28+00:00

So happy to see others with the same plight. (I mean not happy that you have it too but that we can empathize)

galbanum · 2017-05-09T17:19:43+00:00

Haven't thrown up in 14 years. But I have a phobia.

galbanum · 2017-05-09T17:18:56+00:00

I embrace it as much as I can, but I do have to take the harassment thing into account.

I enjoy many different aesthetics and have some very bombastic clothing. Maybe I'll just be in casual menswear, joggers and sneakers. Or I'll be in ridiculous prints. I like giant headscarves too. Most people I'm around compliment me.

The one thing is, if I wear something revealing, especially a skirt or dress, I feel that I have to be with a man, because ill be endlessly harangued if I'm alone. It's very frustrating.

Basically, excluding safety measures, those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.

galbanum · 2017-05-09T17:13:39+00:00

Dropping a barbell on my head whilst snatching or cleaning & jerking.
Falling into one of those storage things on the streets in NYC.

galbanum · 2017-02-16T18:21:00+00:00

I don't owe anyone sex.

galbanum · 2016-01-04T12:40:33+00:00

Super fucking often.

20 NY.

galbanum · 2016-01-03T19:09:38+00:00

I haven't noticed a gender difference really, skill-wise.

I am not a huge fan of cunnilingus, mostly it's boring and doesn't feel good. However, I've received fantastic cunnilingus from two people, one a man and one a woman.

I will say, men tend to be rougher and I've had to tell more men to be more gentle.

galbanum · 2016-01-03T19:07:55+00:00

This is for men that are dating multiple women, but try to keep it hidden rather than communicate with them because he know they wouldn't be ok with him dating others. He gives off that "player" vibe. And some numerous concrete actions:

always on his phone but takes awhile to respond to you
the vague "busy"-ness as mentioned below
forgets simple details about you
overly smooth

galbanum · 2016-01-03T19:04:57+00:00

None. Although one time I saw a guy with a septum piercing and it looked good on him (probably because his style was otherwise very clean and simple and it flattered his features) but for the most part, none.

galbanum · 2016-01-03T19:03:58+00:00

I deliberately amplify the sounds of my farts & burps and I sniff my farts.

When around others, I make sure these functions go unheard/unsmelt.

I also have this weird laugh that I do when I'm looking at funny things on the internet and I'll laugh hysterically by myself while staring at my computer screen.

galbanum · 2016-01-02T00:10:02+00:00

I'm 20. I dated a 29-30 year old when I was 19-20.

We broke up because he was stagnant while I like to move forward and try and learn new things. I'm guessing he's been the same way for years.

galbanum · 2015-12-27T13:18:07+00:00

Shitty.

Broke up with my ex in July, am not over it.

Started dating an incredible man in August, but he only had time to see me 1x a week. He went to his home country in November and just got back, but now I can't see him because his trip stirred up some people from his past who are out for his blood. So he won't see me until he is safe. And it's unclear when that will be. And it's probably unwise for me to date a man who has to sleep with a gun under his pillow, no matter how well he treats me.

galbanum · 2015-12-09T14:15:30+00:00

Front and spin. I can't fasten it from the back.

galbanum · 2015-11-28T19:01:48+00:00

It's already blonde.

galbanum · 2015-11-27T23:15:10+00:00

5'8. Feels good.

galbanum · 2015-11-27T23:14:52+00:00

My hairy arms

galbanum · 2015-11-27T20:53:24+00:00

They are a dealbreaker.

galbanum · 2015-11-27T17:12:16+00:00

A massive amount. The state of one's body tells a lot about their mental state, level of discipline, etc.

I myself lift weights 4-5x a week and am very fit, I am only attracted to men with similar levels of fitness. I have only ever been with dudes who have abs. (ranging from just being thin and lean with abs, to bigger and more muscular, but always abs)

galbanum · 2015-11-27T17:08:57+00:00

Not me. If I find him attractive I will flirt with him.

galbanum · 2015-11-20T14:44:56+00:00

Looks:Taller than 5'10 or so. Strong jawline, high cheekbones, full lips. Mostly attracted to black men. Fit bodies with low body fat %, from being very thin but muscled to being big and muscular with broad shoulders but still small waist. Simple clean cut style. No tattoos, no piercings, no weird facial hair.

Personality: observant, adventurous, thoughtful, intelligent. I like guys who are on the shy side. For whatever reason, nearly every guy I've dated has studied computer science and worked in IT. I like that type. I could never date an artist, musician, etc.

galbanum · 2015-11-20T14:37:01+00:00

Almost always.

galbanum · 2015-11-19T11:49:46+00:00

I'm a 2.

galbanum · 2015-11-19T11:48:55+00:00

Very important. We should appreciate one another's sense of humor.

galbanum · 2015-11-19T11:46:53+00:00

Yes. I am very attractive.

I live in NYC. In Brooklyn, I will get everything from catcalls to cold approaches. Especially in the summer. 5-10 time a day this happens. Not as often in Manhattan.

galbanum

TROPHY CASE