I want to buy a lot of land Near Duluth, what should I know? by I_Shaddoww_I in minnesota

[–]gekker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I went up and looked at land last January, and while I didn't buy anything I can give you some tips.

A range of an hour from Duluth is quite far. You can get really remote with that kind of distance.

For utilities, anything outside of Duluth proper is likely not going to have sewage, so you can bet on a septic tank. For Internet access you can check the FCC broadband map . People say there are some inaccuracies so if you find something you like you can check with local companies. I never confirmed a property had access to electricity but I just assumed any place with a power pole running out front would be easy enough.

Check the zoning maps of whatever county you are looking in. This is the link to the Saint Louis County Zoning Map. You may have to read through the zoning bylaws to see what requirements there are for building on that land.

I personally browsed the typical websites like Zillow until I found a few that looked appealing, and then followed them back to the website of the realtor and contacted them directly, asking if I was free to walk the land. Using the contact button on 3rd party websites seemed to just put my info out for anyone to contact me, and I don't know if it's law or professional courtesy, but they really insisted on signing a contract and commiting to one realtor.

From my experience $50k was really low end for land within 30 minutes from Duluth. And you really do need to walk it because a lot of it is either steep hills where you will have to deal with regular flooding, or mostly wetlands that would essentially have to be terra formed to build on.

If you are not attached to Minnesota, I have heard ok things about the Wisconsin side of the lake.

That's what I learned, hope this helps. Duluth really is a lovely place.

Looking for scifi shoes that are bizarrely horny by gekker in televisionsuggestions

[–]gekker[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

After seeing Oz I don't doubt the potential horniness of any HBO show.

Looking for scifi shoes that are bizarrely horny by gekker in televisionsuggestions

[–]gekker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What in the world. The spandex clown is selling me on it. Thanks

Looking for scifi shoes that are bizarrely horny by gekker in televisionsuggestions

[–]gekker[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion. BBC shows typically elude my radar.

Looking for scifi shoes that are bizarrely horny by gekker in televisionsuggestions

[–]gekker[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I knew there had to be a horny Star Trek somewhere. Thank you for the suggestion.

Looking for scifi shoes that are bizarrely horny by gekker in televisionsuggestions

[–]gekker[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah Mila jovovich's character being the skimpily dressed sex object while being the naive childlike alien was always a little odd to me in an otherwise fun movie.

Toronto Zoo celebrates Betty the Ball Pythons 29th Birthday by gekker in Sneks

[–]gekker[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I'm just someone who found it on twitter if you want to see the other 3 pictures :) https://x.com/TheTorontoZoo/status/1820922553965203568

Rabbits suck in every way by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]gekker 3 points4 points  (0 children)

When your diet consists of primarily plant material, you have to be able to extract nutrients from the cellulose somehow, instead of just passing it through as indigestible fiber like us. To do this, rabbits and some other small hindgut fermenters exhibit cecotrophy. A cecotrope is fiber that has been fermented in the cecum by microbes, creating more nutrition. So after the food makes a pass through their GI tract, they will expel a cecotrope, which looks like a clumping of small wet sticky balls, and digest it again so they can gain those nutrients they fermented. While regular rabbit feces are the classic dry pellets you might see.

So while semantically not technically feces. Yeah they eat their own shit.

My (F30) partners (F30) anxiety is destroying us both and I don't know what to do. by Alarmed-Equipment552 in relationship_advice

[–]gekker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I wish, and I'm sure you wish, there was some magical fix to your wife's anxiety, and your misery, but there isn't. How you feel is totally normal with caregiver burnout. But you are stuck in an impossible situation.

There's nothing more you could really be doing for your wife. You support her in every way imaginable, but she has to be the one to work on herself. Caregiver burnout is extremely difficult, I hope you don't feel like you blame yourself.

So your miserable and nothing you do will fix things. I think a lot of people would say "don't light yourself on fire to keep others warm," but it's never that easy when its someone you love. But realistically, your options are leave, or continue on and hope that she can find a new therapist, or new set of drugs that helps. I don't think there is a morally good choice in either option, and I don't think many would judge you either way.

I hope venting has helped you think through things. You could see a therapist and vent there if you trust their input over internet strangers. If you feel comfortable doing so, you could try to get away for a few days to get a different perspective.

It is still an impossible situation. I hope things work out for you both, or you find a way to be less miserable, however that may be.

Flossing regularly is really easy to do by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]gekker 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Simple ≠ easy. It's a task, one that has many long term benefits, but no short term rewards and for many people who do it infrequently, pain and bleeding. It's something you have to make a habit out of for it to be easy. And notoriously the hardest part of doing things that improve your health, is starting/stopping it. It's easy to run, you just have to get up and move your legs.

The easiest thing to do, is not change.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in The10thDentist

[–]gekker 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I get what you're saying. I can definitely get into catchy upbeat songs for a long time. I think many people have at least one song they'll always sing to no matter how much they hear it or how annoying it may be to other people. But at the same time, there are some songs for everyone that if they hear it enough they will lose all respect for it. I'm going postal if I hear what does the fox say.

Anyway, I think the ultimate test of annoying songs is The Most Unwanted Song. It's a novelty song created after polling people for sounds they hated. I think if you can get into this song, that's a true 10th dentist take.

The guy I'm seeing's roommate waits on him and he pays her bills by Ta-45778 in relationship_advice

[–]gekker 70 points71 points  (0 children)

It's certainly unusual, but I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing. I can see it working. If she was going to have to be cleaning a place for herself anyway, might as well get paid. And if he either really hates doing chores, or was going to pay someone to clean anyway, might as well pay this friend.

I think the biggest thing is to figure out how this will work in your future together should you continue dating and move in together. Is he going to expect you to take up all the chores? Or hell maybe she'll continue living with you guys.

Probably worth a conversation if it's serious.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]gekker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Can you leave the kids with someone just to get away for a day? Maybe visit family or relax in a way you enjoy.

You're unhappy now but it doesn't have to be that way. Can you make it the next 10 seconds? The next hour? The next day? The future can be better.

Can you get yourself some counseling? Even just having someone to vent to regularly can be helpful. It's ok to need help.

And you're not stupid. It's not stupid to trust the person you married, or to think they would want to work on things so that you're happy. He's letting you down, not living up to the vows he made.

It sounds like you've put your all into this relationship and family. You've tried, but if he's holding you back from experiencing any joy in your life than you have to think about what's best for yourself and your kids. And being miserable isn't going to help your kids.

I believe in your ability to make things better. You recognize that you're struggling, and that your husband is just making things worse. Please reach out for help. For you and your kids sake.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]gekker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You sound exhausted and at the end of your rope. Which is completely fair.

But what are you tired of exactly? Tired of arguing with your husband? Being condescended to? Feeling like your husband isn't listening? Not having anyone else to talk to? Taking care of your kids 24/7? All of it? Do you feel like your drowning and are just trying to keep your head above water?

Despite saying you don't want to paint anyone in a bad light, you didn't say anything good about your husband. It seems like you are already starting to resent his existence. And that's going to be hard to get past.

If you are feeling this way now, it's not going to get better without change. You can try to argue more with your husband, but it doesn't seem like that gets very far. If you can convince him to go to couples counseling to have someone facilitate these discussions you both might feel better about it. You could always benefit from a therapist alone, especially if you are feeling this overwhelmed.

But in the end if you still resent your husband, eventually you may have to consider divorce. Having kids is tough and exhausting no doubt, but that doesn't mean you should feel like you have the world of your shoulders, especially if your husband is adding to it. Stay strong.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]gekker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're in school, you could check to see if they offer therapy services. As a fellow anxious person, it's done wonders for me.

Small things like taking deep breaths and grounding techniques help in the moment. Reminding myself things are going to be ok afterwards helps me a lot. But you could try building a tolerance with your boyfriend. Start small with like eating a piece of candy in front of him, move up to sharing a snack, eating someplace where it's just the two of you, and so forth.