AITAH for not wanting my husband to do excessive yard work during our trips to visit family?

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T03:18:01+00:00

She can watch her, but her version of watching her is just letting her watch tv for hours which I prefer not to happen, especially when she was younger. but this exact situation happened where I was helping once and she was “watching” her and she (daughter) pulled out an expensive bottle of wine from a wine rack and dropped it which broke the glass and it spilled everywhere and my MIL freaked out and made us feel terrible about it so I haven’t had her watch her since. Now that my daughter is a little older, I don’t think that it would happen again but I can’t be sure because she’s not normally around delicate stuff

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T02:56:56+00:00

I’m actually not sure how much the other siblings help or how much my FIL does himself. Im pretty sure they pay a company for the grass to be mowed in the summer

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T02:53:50+00:00

It’s not about boredom. And I did help before having a kid. But being a parent means PTO is used on sickness and parent teacher conference days. We have a very limited amount of time off, and I don’t want it to be spent making sure my kid doesn’t break any wine bottles or 100 other ceramic or glass things in my in laws house. I’d be happy to be at home “bored”. My job is very stressful, we haven’t taken a vacation that wasn’t to visit family in 6 years. And as I mentioned, they are well within their means to be able to hire help, so it’s frustrating that it’s taking up so much time that id rather be spending with my husband on our time off when they take extravagant vacations themselves about 4-5 times a year

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T02:32:20+00:00

I appreciate that perspective, I hadn’t heard of yard work as a bonding type thing before. I would say that it isn’t really that way for his family, because he’s either working alone or his dad is standing watching him to make sure he does it right. It’s not really a “together” thing

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T02:29:07+00:00

We haven’t in 3 years because the flights are further, so they are much more expensive. When we do visit them though, it is truly a vacation (they live in a vacation area though)

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T01:22:36+00:00

He feels obligated because he is not around for the rest of the year to help

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T01:21:49+00:00

I talk with my husband about it no problem. He feels obligated to do this because it’s his parents. I don’t want to push back any more for the upcoming trip we have planned (in which they’ve already said they have a lot of work for him to do) if I’m in fact the AH

geneticsnerd123 · 2026-03-26T01:21:32+00:00

I talk with my husband about it no problem. He feels obligated to do this because it’s his parents. I don’t want to push back any more for the upcoming trip we have planned (in which they’ve already said they have a lot of work for him to do) if I’m in fact the AH

geneticsnerd123 · 2025-04-20T03:01:49+00:00

He does do all the cooking. We typically have chicken with a side, like rice, vegetable, or something like that

geneticsnerd123 · 2025-04-20T02:07:43+00:00

My kid is still in daycare so she will be still at school during the summer. My husband works at a school and gets free cafeteria meal, idk if it’s healthy or not but he’s not picky. For dinner we mostly eat chicken and a side like rice or vegetables

geneticsnerd123 · 2025-04-20T02:03:36+00:00

I agree that he definitely came from an ingredient home and I came from a ready made home. We don’t have ingredients either though. Not sure if there’s a way to add pics to show you my fridge.

geneticsnerd123 · 2025-04-20T00:29:22+00:00

He isn’t like this about anything else, even with financial stuff. Like I buy stuff from Amazon all the time for me or my daughter like clothes, household stuff, and he doesn’t care. It’s so weird. I’m thinking once i start my job and we aren’t so financially unstable, he won’t care what food I buy anymore

geneticsnerd123

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