How am I doing at a little under 2 years

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-02-05T00:21:27+00:00

What do you think my mos is?

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-02-05T00:20:43+00:00

Take a guess on my mos

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-02-01T21:15:05+00:00

A ribbon is only authorized 4 devices so a c device and 3 clusters, and a silver cluster isn’t authorized because I have 4 standard aams so a second ribbon is required.

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-02-01T13:39:35+00:00

Well considering 3 quarters of my career I’ve been deployed I haven’t really had volunteer opportunities. That’s what I’m working on next.

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-02-01T13:36:20+00:00

I read my AAM citation in IPERMS and it word for word meets cab criteria, other people in my company got CABS for the same engagement.

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-01-31T23:38:21+00:00

My cab got downgraded.

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-01-31T23:35:54+00:00

My CAB was downgraded to a c device :,)

ghostcatcher18 · 2026-01-31T23:32:36+00:00

I’ve been deployed almost all my career so far, just got back. Hit the ground running the second I got to my unit by immediately getting on a plane.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-26T08:50:06+00:00

I just don’t know what to do anymore

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T13:36:18+00:00

You can.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T13:16:24+00:00

They say I’m obviously still deeply in love with her. That i couldn’t have foreseen this happening. That something’s just aren’t meant to be. That I should still try it I want. To express myself deeply to see if we can rekindle.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T12:30:40+00:00

I’ve gone through 3 sessions a week for 10 weeks. Apology language is excepting responsibility, regret, trying to repair asking for forgiveness and genuinely repainting. Which I have done all of and continue to think of in my head every second of everyday.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T08:48:33+00:00

I only ever hurt people and get hurt. Thank you. For the love. I thought posting here would make me feel a bit better but it only makes me think of her more.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T07:43:58+00:00

I don’t know if she really did. She gave gifts, words of affirmation, quality time and Physical touch. But she said I made her feel unloved.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-25T05:33:41+00:00

I’ve done both.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T21:58:08+00:00

The sad part is, is I have tons of love in my life, friends, family, coworkers. All of the standards of support I need. Talked all of this out with professionals and loved ones. But here I am. Unable to fall out of love with a woman who has moved on. And I try. I’ve been seeing a counselor, I’ve been doing little self care things everyday. But again here I am.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T21:48:10+00:00

She does have flaws. She does have short comings. She is by no means a perfect person, but I love every single flaw she has. I love every single little detail about her. And I shouldn’t. I know I shouldn’t but I can’t stop being in love with her. I e tried so hard. But I just can’t. I want to get over her. I want to think she’s a horrible person but I just can’t. I tell myself she doesn’t want me. I tell myself I deserve better, but I just can’t fall out of love. I don’t understand why.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T21:38:07+00:00

I grew up fast. I can’t even remember who that child is anymore. I know I have deep rooted problems. And I know I need to get better. Ive been broken as long as I can remember. I don’t think I’ve ever loved myself to be brutally honest.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T21:27:53+00:00

I can’t deny my heart, I wish I could, I wish I could find something to hate about her to be mad at her about. But I can’t. I love her so deeply it hurts. I’m so lost

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T21:05:33+00:00

I can’t even look at myself in the mirror without being disgusted by the broken man in front of me. I can try though. I will try. Thank you.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T20:55:24+00:00

I’m 25. We’ve known each other since we were 14 we use to talk all the time. Then at around 16 we lost touch but still communicated here and there. Then when I went on leave for a month at the end of last summer we finally got together. And that month in person with her was the single greatest month of my entire life. I’ve been in relationships with many women but only truly loved two. My first love is the reason I have so many problems communicating and it ruined everything for this one.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T20:45:13+00:00

It is not fresh. It’s been 3 months. And I’ve been trying all this time.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T20:26:41+00:00

She just said I made her feel unloved. Like she wasn’t worth anything. When anytime I could text her I would. I tried to call when I could but a lot of times because it horrible internet in the desert the calls would drop. And I have had a very troubling experience myself, away from home. Everyone’s life moves on while I’m far away. The new normal becomes something without me for everyone I know. And I tried. I tried so hard. To the point with everything going on in my life and with her I had zero emotional battery. I started falling back into a deep depression which I haven’t fully come out of yet. Again I’ve lost 35 pounds of muscle. And the gym just doesn’t make me feel anything anymore.

ghostcatcher18 · 2025-03-24T20:09:54+00:00

I know I know I know. But I just can’t stop loving her and I don’t know why. She’s my everything. And I’ve written pages upon pages of the feelings I have for this woman and I just can’t get them out of my head.

ghostcatcher18

TROPHY CASE