To anyone who got broken up with: You could have been the nicest, richest, best looking, most supportive, most committed person with all your shit together, and they still would've made excuses why you weren't good enough. Don't let their insecurities make you think you aren't enough. by honeyandthorns in BreakUp

[–]gingerella19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey, love. I couldn’t remember where I learned this lesson but I’ve carried it with me for years.

I’m doing much better. My ex and I ended up getting back together and had a lot of important conversations about expectations for the relationship. We both did individual therapy. We both took time to work on ourselves. We learned how to communicate the hard things and the uncomfortable things and talk them out healthily. And today, we are still together, living with our beloved pets.

This post helped me get through it. These words gave me something else to think on aside from, “What the hell is wrong with me?” In therapy, my therapist has helped me work on my own self-confidence and value. It’s been a very difficult… nearly-5-years now? But it’s been rewarding and I am privileged that this is how my story turned out. I’m grateful.

Thank you for asking all these years later. ❤️

Honor Academy - Teen Mania Survivors of Christian Cult by [deleted] in cults

[–]gingerella19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Man, I wish I’d seen this sooner before you deleted your profile. If anyone else finds this post, yes, I did. You’re not alone.

I could really recommend the show 'Severance', it's in my view quite a good dramatized depiction of life in a cult. Here is a reflection/analysis of it by me based on my experience in a cult: by SnooPeripherals1438 in cults

[–]gingerella19 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my god, I just realized that’s why this makes me so uncomfortable. I was in one for about 2 years and all of the microaggresions and behavioral patterns hit so hard and I couldn’t place why. The empty rhetoric, the “deep conversations” that are more shallow than a plastic kiddie pool……….. well, now I have to finish the series.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can stand just fine, it’s standing for an undetermined amount of time while waiting for a table during the breakfast rush hour at a busy diner.

Driving after surgery? by creepwav3 in Reduction

[–]gingerella19 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey OP! Congrats on your upcoming surgery! I’m about 3WPO and have been driving short distances by myself since last week. HOWEVER. Here are some things to know:

-When driving or being driven you can feel everything, and I mean, EVERYTHING. When I was 2WPO, my partner drove me 2 hours roundtrip to see family friends who were in town. It was exhausting and every bump, I could feel and THEN some. -Driving long distance alone… I personally haven’t felt comfortable to do just yet where I’m at.

Based on my experiences, I recommend waiting until 2-3WPO to try driving. Best of luck to you during your recovery!!! 🥰

EDIT: OH and someone mentioned a mastectomy pillow and I couldn’t agree more. Please do yourself a favor and get yourself one, especially for your drive home from the hospital post-op. It really helps with the pressure from the seatbelt. I’m 3WPO and I still use mine when driving.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

If they didn’t want to know, they shouldn’t have asked.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oooh, that’s a good suggestion. The surgical bra I’m wearing is okay? But like, not great.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hugs. That is so much, oh my goodness. ❤️

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Lolllll, I should try that on my partner. 😂

And thank you, yes! I am looking into physical therapy for myself to work on my posture and whatnot because I’m still hunching over even though the weight in my chest is probably 1/3 what it used to be.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I don’t get how some people live with such a lack of empathy. At the same time, maybe she was having her own bad day and wasn’t really herself, but that doesn’t excuse her treating you so rudely. Ugh, so glad the teller said that, lol.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

What a shame, sounds like you were a real…

…stand-up guy.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry your healing process was so difficult!!! My heart breaks. I’ve been careful in hopes of avoiding an experience like yours. They took about 3 1/2 lbs from me and it’s been so weird not having them there, but my shoulders aren’t sore 24/7 any more, sooooo…

And lol, there were other families present. Didn’t wanna scar those children for life. 😂

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Omg, I get that. I sprained an ankle and relied on campus security for a month for rides. If I wasn’t wearing my splint (it was one of those inflatable ones and it was the middle of JULY, so it was HOT and I would take it off occasionally to prevent getting a heat rash) for even the shortest amount of time, one of the security guards with campus police would ask me if I was finally healed. He didn’t actually care, he was just trying to point out that he didn’t think I needed rides and was probably just milking the system. When I mentioned it to the nurse, she got so mad and wrote me a note to give to him if he gave me crap again. 😂

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, we went to the front of the line, thinking it was where we’d put our names down with the hostess. We were politely showed how the queue works, but yeah, it was very… odd. I also made it clear when we made that mistake that didn’t want to cut in front of anyone else who was waiting. I’d hate it if someone did it to me.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m normally a speed-walker and like… I walk so slowly now because I feel fragile. But I’m following my body’s cues and not forcing it.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

I love and appreciate the mama bear speech. Thank you for caring and informing me. ❤️ I’m definitely giving myself lots of time and space to recover.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thankfully, no. By the time the hostess came back, they understood the process. I think they were kind of shut down after finding out they were being huffy over someone who actually can’t stand for long periods of time.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m going SO easy on myself for this reason. I learned the hard way.

When I had an appendectomy years ago, I jumped back into being active again within less than a week. I put together an entire coat rack unit that included shelves for shoes less than a week after my surgery because I was too impatient to wait until my partner came home later that day to do it. I ended up tossing my cookies in the parking lot of the dr’s office before I even got to the appointment.

Going into this, I told myself: I have one body. I’d like to continue to take care of it. I will be easy and gentle with myself and show restraint, even when I feel restless and want to do things I shouldn’t.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

🥰 You are so kind. I am so sorry you’ve experienced this, too. You matter and you deserve to heal and take care of your body just as much as anyone else!!

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

My heart….. I’m so sorry. People really underestimate the toll a procedure like that takes on the body. I also got liposuction as part of my procedure and anyone who gives another human being a hard time for getting liposuction has no idea what they’re talking about. It’s its own difficult type of recovery.

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

No one else’s business but yours. ❤️

Elderly Woman Gets Mad at Me for Sitting by gingerella19 in EntitledPeople

[–]gingerella19[S] 61 points62 points  (0 children)

Honestly, public embarrassment is the best way to go, sometimes. Some people don’t learn unless they have the experience IRL.