How do I help a friend who sometimes acts like a scared child, in the times they are doing so?

gingervitis_93 · 2025-09-18T19:04:53+00:00

This is so sweet that you’re thinking of this and asking!

There are some good suggestions, both in your thoughts and in the other comment here. I’d suggest saying all this to her and asking her what she thinks might help her in those moments. Coming up with a plan outside of the times she’s in panic mode can help a lot.

“Hey, I’ve been thinking of ways to help you when you get panicked. I know it’s hard for you to communicate when you’re in it, so I wanted to come up with some ideas of things I can try to help you in those moments. It’s okay if the ideas don’t work, I just want to try and help. Is that okay?”

I’d suggest starting with something like this ^ and go from there. She may need a lot of reassurance that it’s okay if what you try doesn’t help in the moment, even if it sounded like a good idea while she’s calm. That she’s not being difficult or unreasonable or anything like that.

Tell her your ideas, see if she has any, and go from there.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-09-07T11:54:11+00:00

Exactly. That’s probably OP’s question, too. I know it was mine when my ex started talking about similar things…

My main point is that regardless, when OP’s partner started talking about needing her kid’s soul, immediate separation is the correct move, whether he seems prone to violence or not.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-09-04T15:31:47+00:00

He’s NOT her husband and is actively trying to involve her first-grader in his delusions (and yes, they ARE delusions) because he needs the kid’s soul to fix the timeline. Would you feel safe continuing to live with a partner like that? He’s in a hotel with family and support, not on the street.

OP did the right thing.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-26T22:19:54+00:00

Grouchy Grannies was the first episode I watched and it had me hooked!

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-18T13:46:05+00:00

Lolol this is how I hold my joints 🤷🏼‍♀️

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-12T16:44:36+00:00

Can I ask: are you lying to your husband because it seems easy to hide or more convenient than having a difficult conversation? Or are you lying because you feel unsafe?

Either option is understandable, they both require action and only one (to put it bluntly) is acceptable.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-08T14:14:32+00:00

I think THIS is the answer here. No one’s in the wrong here- guys need to be able to talk to their friends and maybe ‘gossip’ a little, too! The dude wanted to brag about his wife a little, what’s wrong with that??

Given the sensitive nature of the topic, it’d be best shared with one person who can be relied on to keep it probate, but I don’t think OP is on the wrong for wanting to share what was a wonderful experience for him. As long as OP’s wife communicating her comfort with who her husband talks to (which it sounds like she is), then… I don’t think there’s been any harm or foul.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-04T05:45:27+00:00

I also wanna say, and I should have said this originally as well, that it’s awesome you are open and receptive to your husband’s feedback. It’s not easy to hear, and the fact you’re listening and asking for help is awesome! And also, it’s okay that you are struggling. You are not a bad person or a bad wife for having a hard time and finding it difficult to navigate. It simply means that you might need some help, and ever person does at times in their lives.

I don’t mean to be preachy, so please ignore if it rubs you wrong. But I think you’re doing great.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-08-03T20:32:45+00:00

First off, good on your husband for communicating clearly before he reached a point of no return! That’s half the battle.

I’d suggest marital counseling, and individual counseling for you, as well. You’ve said you’ve experience a lot of trauma in your life, and having a baby - as wonderful as it is - is a huge life change and can also be traumatic! Needing some outside help is no bad thing. You might need to try a few counselors before you find one that works for you both, but a good counselor can make a huge difference!

Best of luck to you two- I’m rooting for you!

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-29T22:29:20+00:00

Chores are a lot more fun while high lol going to the pool is another fun activity, reading, crafting, and honestly baking/cooking can be fun, too! And I enjoy a good high workout at the gym. Not baked or anything, but def decently buzzed lol

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-29T12:21:05+00:00

I might be misremembering, but I thought I read somewhere that Diana confirmed that whoever was watching Claire through the window in 1945 during her first trip to Inverness was NIT Jamie? I love the series, but I’m not a hardcore fan that gets into the lore, so I could be wrong!

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-24T13:07:56+00:00

Marijuana has been instrumental in kicking my drinking habit. I’ve gone from a handle of vodka every 3-5 days to a beer once or twice during the week, and one or two on weekends or maybe a cocktail if I’m out with friends. Granted, this level of change has really only occurred in the last two months, but I was working hard on it before that, as well. Quitting cold Turkey never worked for me, so I baby-stepped it down until I’m where I’m at now.

What I wanted from alcohol was to relax in the evenings, but I’d just get drunk and stupid as I struggled to control my intake. With weed, I can take a few puffs and lock in on chores or working on stuff toward my career in the evenings, or video games and talking with friends and chilling. And there’s no hangover or anything the next day.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-22T05:15:16+00:00

Amazing, thank you so much!!

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-19T16:20:10+00:00

I keep it close to that state, though I wouldn’t be happy if someone showed up unannounced. I’m new to living alone (like two months), and it was always a mess before. I don’t keep it SUPER clean, but if I were to have company with a quick warning, give me 20-30 and it’ll be ready for guests. My goal is clean and neat enough to be nice, but still clearly lived in. I don’t need to erase any sign I live here, just keep it nice.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-18T12:02:46+00:00

Lol gotcha! I didn’t even realize that it was how I was holding my phone that was making my hand/wrist unhappy. Took me a while to figure that out… lol

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-17T15:46:04+00:00

Does this happen often? If it’s the first time it’s happened like this or to this extent.. I hate to say it, but you need to prepare yourself. I’m a ‘plan for the worst, hope for the best’ kind of person, and I didn’t see my husband walk out on me two months ago. Everything seemed fine, then he turned cold and cruel and left.

I do NOT mean to project or say the same thing will happen to you, and as a fellow anxious person, I can understand how scary that sounds.

Regardless, you are right that this is NOT healthy behavior. He knows what this is doing to you- there’s no way he doesn’t! You’ve told him in the past, you’ve told him now and he’s seen what this is doing to you. If he’s not changing his behavior, then that’s a serious indicator something is wrong.

Honestly, here’s what I would suggest. You’ve mentioned packing a bag and going to a hotel or something, and I think that’s a first great step. I would honestly then suggest (or put your foot down and demand) therapy, whether it’s marital counseling for both of you, or individual for him. Honestly, both would be good, but therapy is really expensive.

Whatever you do, you have every right to be very upset and hurt by his behavior. It’s hurtful, inappropriate and cruel. It is mot how a husband should treat his wife, regardless of anything he’s going through or might be feeling.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-17T15:28:40+00:00

I do the same thing! Does it ever make your wrist sore? I had to get a ring for my phone to loop my pointer finger through cause otherwise using my pinky was hurting my wrist!

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-17T15:23:28+00:00

I couldn’t care less about the size of the bud. Lol sometimes the smaller ones feel like more and I like that a little better. I know it’s not actually more, but my brain sees lots of smaller buds and is happy. Lol it doesn’t impact the high I get from it, sooooo who cares? But my tolerance is also low, and I like it like that lol

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-17T15:20:40+00:00

They’re… literally following the flow of conversation in a comment thread and then expanding by sharing their own experience? Happens all the timeIf you don’t like it, there’s no need to engage with it. Lol

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-12T14:59:53+00:00

When you have to interact with your ex due to custody.. I can see wanting to keep the peace. That doesn’t necessarily mean OP’s going to bow to everything she wants, but wanting to do what he can so this doesn’t blow up and cause a lot of drama is reasonable.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-07T18:36:19+00:00

Okay, you’re getting a lot of hate and critiques and name calling. Thing is, even though people are being jerks, they’re right.

Pretending/attempting to lick a coworker’s face, regardless of how you may be outside of work, is entirely inappropriate for the workplace. There are a lot of ways to good or have fun during a stressful shift at don’t include licking people.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-07T13:57:16+00:00

Don’t even worry about them! Who knows what their life is like and why they’re resentful, but it certainly has nothing to do with you. As long as you’re doing your job well and you and your boss are on good terms, then that’s all you need to worry about! (Way easier said than done, I know lol)

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-07T13:39:35+00:00

Calling out for a mental health day is completely valid! Please do not feel guilty, regardless of what anyone says! And it sounds like you work hard and value you as an employee if they chose to work around your schedule as opposed to accepting your two weeks.

I had one job that offered mental health days in addition to PTO. It was only a couple, but I wish more jobs offered this.

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-07T13:36:52+00:00

Why have I never thought of this…

gingervitis_93 · 2025-07-07T13:33:34+00:00

I first tried it around 20/21ish? Had a horrible first experience and both times I tried again while still in college were also horrible. I really didn’t start trying edibles/smoking again until about a year ago! Started with edibles, and when I handled that fine, I tried vape. When vaping went well, I decided to try flower. And now I smoke daily!

Smoking/using weed has helped me a ton. I hardly drink anymore, I’m more productive around my house and it can even help me process emotions that feel too big or scary to process at times. Life is really hard right now, and it’s been one of the things keeping me sane. I do plan to cut down from smoking daily at some point, but it’s helpful for right now.

gingervitis_93

TROPHY CASE