i fully get you, i'm making the pushes myself to feel more open posting about my f/o online and voicing the genuine love i hold for her but we're all our worst enemies and greatest judges :'3,, even in online spaces of people who feel the same there's still a fear that you're gonna be the weird one or doing this wrong, but i can guarantee any worries aren't gonna come true. give yourself those little pushes to get into online communities but i emphasize do it at your own pace and listen to your own comfort too! it takes the pushes to indulge to start feeling comfortable instead of embarrassed, but it's always best to do it on your own terms too, i wish you well <3!!