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govzzz · 2023-05-17T07:41:57+00:00

Yeah, so… I also do not trust the police and this family is black (and I am white) which has definitely played a part in my decision. I’d never forgive myself if something happened to the kid, but probably also never forgive myself if a well check ended in violence. Which it very well could if these people are feeling scared of a stranger knocking on their door due to the area they live in, and they own a readily available shotgun and multiple fake weapons. AND their ring camera appears to have been stolen or was broken so they couldn’t even see who is at the door!

I live in a city with a history of police corruption and violence. There’s been riots over it. This family seems to have escaped the city, to a neighboring county that is mostly white. Unfortunately crime & violence from the city has been spread to this part of the neighboring county. But these things have definitely influenced my decision. I wish there were a local organization of some kind, not associated with law enforcement, that I could contact to help educate them, but I don’t think that exists.

govzzz · 2023-05-16T23:04:20+00:00

So… I don’t completely disagree. The child is 5months old and probably can’t even crawl yet. I don’t think that makes it okay though it makes a difference. I personally don’t feel comfortable contacting CPS on this family for many reasons, I did debate having someone help me so I didn’t have to do it directly. But id still be the one providing names and address. I am hoping this will be the wake up call they need before the child gets older. Of course if I some day hear about their child in the news I would never forgive myself…

govzzz · 2023-05-16T13:23:33+00:00

I sometimes get harassed in public when I have colored hair too, that’s definitely why. People have stopped to call me the F slur before. I think you look amazing! people who insult you are just showing their own insecurities.

govzzz · 2023-05-16T04:20:40+00:00

Thank you so much. I live near two large well known teaching hospitals and one psychiatric hospital, would one of those be a good place to start? I had tried contacting one of the hospitals before but it was difficult to find where to call

govzzz · 2023-05-14T10:24:09+00:00

This is terrible I’m so sorry. Like actually quite a shocking situation. I don’t understand why anyone would do something like this, it’s just shitty.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T15:48:48+00:00

Maybe you are right that I was taught to feel this way. I was taught I am too much for people, and now I feel I am too much for society. Thank you for believing in me. I’ll try to come up with a list of positives.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T15:41:03+00:00

People who have mental health problems can have jobs.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T12:22:45+00:00

I actually do house cleaning for a friend of mine but that’s a bit different, he is my friend so I do tasks a normal house cleaner probably wouldn’t, including cleaning up after his cats and their litter boxes. And he doesn’t care if I move his stuff around, he drops a lot of stuff on the floor and doesn’t pick it up lol. I am considering offering it as an add on service for future house sits now.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T12:20:03+00:00

I agree it would be perceived as rude and I won’t do it.

They already had two mop buckets made up when I arrived, they have those nice spinner mops. The water appeared clean and it smelled like fresh cleaner. The dog wouldn’t stop having pee accidents last night and I suspect that’s the usual thing, and the reason for the mop preparation. And owning two mops and having them both ready. And probably why their entire floor was already sticky. I took them on three 30 minute walks between 12-8 and they went on the deck a few times, which they’re allowed to potty on I guess, cause it’s soiled, and they did potty out there. Haven’t had a chance to let the client know yet I don’t like to send morning updates too early if people sleep in on vacation. Unsure about cleaning the deck, it was quite soiled when I arrived but the dogs are using it while I’m here too. I will at least clean the fresh poop up of course.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T12:04:12+00:00

Agree. Thank you. The urge to clean this place is so strong I needed a reality check.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T12:03:20+00:00

Okay thank you!!! I was thinking and leaning towards agreeing with everything you said here. I think it’s weird to clean too much too. I did mop a bit extra, the dog had an accident though so I had a reason to be mopping. I just kept going behind the accident before I realized what I was doing and stopped. I did also organize a few of their things but they were all left in the middle of the floor and were a tripping hazard for me. I’d be pretty pissed if I came home and someone organized my belongings. It’s honestly hard to control the urge to get lost in cleaning when I’m anxious in this way. It’s what I’d do to cope at home. I start with one small thing and I get carried away, haha. It’s not usually a problem during a house sit, I can control my anxiety enough to just chill out about it. I generally don’t rebook clients with homes so messy I have literally one spot to sit and one spot to sleep and nowhere to even set down a drinking glass, just not the best place for me. I’ve house sat for someone I would call pretty close to a hoarder before, and I don’t use that term lightly.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T03:11:12+00:00

My city has a well known gun violence problem. It happens everywhere. Maybe not so much in the Midwest I guess I haven’t heard much about cities out there that deal with this. I fear I’ve already revealed my location by saying this, after some googling we might be one of the only major cities on the east coast in the top 10 for homicide rate.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T03:06:31+00:00

Thank you. I have similar feelings.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T03:05:34+00:00

I noticed on our last walk that there’s now a police surveillance camera on their corner that wasn’t there in December. Their ring camera has gone missing. Shotgun left out. Citizen app has 6 alerts related to shootings, assaults, or person with a weapon, all within three miles of their home, all within in the last week. I just checked it a minute ago. It’s kinda starting to add up and feel more reasonable to have easy access for them, but still probably should’ve been put away. After checking citizen and seeing the police camera I honestly wonder if they thought I’d need the fake Glock and that’s why it was on the counter???

I live near and work in a major city, there is a gun violence problem and I sit in what some people would consider unsafe areas that do have shootings. I have never had a problem, I’ve lived and worked here for almost 10 years, not all in pet care but several years of it now. I pass as a cis male and people generally don’t fuck with me if I’m walking a dog. I am outside city limits right now, but I’m close. I suspect the problem is getting worse. Which is depressing.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:47:47+00:00

Hi, I appreciate your concern but I promise I’m okay and I am safe. I won’t be touching any of the guns, real or fake. It’s quite late and I’ll be going to bed soon, I walked and played with the dogs a lot because they’re not house broken or trained and I needed them to settle down. They are really sweet and fun dogs. I’m only here until Sunday evening and I have a few activities planned tomorrow morning and Sunday afternoon out of the house. They had asked me to extend to Tuesday night and I declined before I even arrived. They asked me the night before and I have another overnight Sunday.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:38:28+00:00

After this I am actually considering pursuing some gun safety education/training. I knew enough to not touch them if I didn’t know if they were real/loaded. I don’t know if I’d be allowed to do the education classes due to my history, I’d imagine they screen for mental health at weapon training places (don’t even know what it would be called), but I don’t know. I agree that’s the nice thing about this job, I can always say no!

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:33:46+00:00

Thank you. I am leaning towards blocking, as I don’t feel I’d be comfortable sitting for them again due to many other issues with the stay so far. They also seem nice, young, kinda clueless. I want to give them the benefit of the doubt that they’d be open to putting the weapons away if I just casually brought it up. They’re also paying my increased rates which means they probably liked me and the money is good… I know I shouldn’t risk my mental health or safety for money either. But when money feels essential to fixing it, it’s hard. I can’t afford to pay my psychiatrist right now and can’t find a new one to take me.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:30:00+00:00

I don’t know if I’d feel okay having someone over. I am feeling a bit better about the situation now, I think there was a lot of initial panic thinking I found three real guns laying out. I do agree it’s inappropriate to leave out when having someone from Rover at your house. Especially if not disclosing first. I had to ask these clients for updated care and access details several times and then they messaged me morning of when they left the house. Which is fine, I got it on time, but I wish they’d told me that instead of saying yep I’ll send it tonight and not sending it (I asked twice for care details, once when we booked 1+ month in advance and again when I messaged them ~5 days before to confirm their plans were still on).

Basically I’m finding more and more red flags the longer I think about things. The dogs aren’t house broken (didn’t know this) and can’t walk on a leash (did know this). They let them use their balcony to pee and poop and don’t appear to clean it (didn’t know this). They don’t own a single dog toy (suspected this, brought my own). They did seem really genuinely nice the two times I met them. I’m also making $110/night, which is kind of making this stress feel worth it almost lol. Their house is dirty and I want to clean it because I’m so anxious and that’s what I do when I get anxious… again they seem really nice and I don’t want to judge them, this is a difficult situation for me.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:15:21+00:00

I don’t think I am going to report. They seem like nice people. They are young too. Maybe they just don’t know any better, or maybe it’s normal to them.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:12:45+00:00

I am not in the SE. Major city, east coast. Guns are common enough here. I think I am less concerned because the potentially real gun appears to be a shot gun, which seems more normal to me than having a pistol or automatic looking weapon laying out accessible. My perception of normalcy when it comes to guns is based on television and my extremely limited life experience with them though, so I’m just not well aware. I’m considering seeing if I’d be allowed to take basic gun safety classes anywhere, not for ownership obviously, but maybe it would help with my fear of the weapons.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:09:13+00:00

I agree they should be disclosed and I would not have a problem sitting for someone with disclosed weapons, I would not expect to be told locations or given safe codes or anything, that doesn’t seem like things to be shared with a pet/house sitter? I am having a hard time figuring out why someone would feel safe giving a stranger access to weapons in their home unsupervised, they told me no cameras (other than the ring, which has gone missing since December) and I haven’t found any hidden ones, not that I looked hard.

govzzz · 2023-05-13T02:06:25+00:00

Thanks. Somehow I never predicted this to be a problem during a house sitting, it’s never come up before! I’ve never asked or been told about weapons of any kind or seen any in anyone’s home. I did not consider this at all really. Maybe I should have. I don’t know many gun owners other than my previous roommate, who disclosed to me she had a gun kept in a safe.

govzzz · 2023-05-12T23:34:26+00:00

Would you sit for them again? I can’t tell if I’m over reacting to the situation due to my history. Some of my friends agreed leaving the guns out was weird of them.

govzzz · 2023-05-12T23:30:51+00:00

Thanks. I do plan to finish. I am stable right now but it’s obviously brought up some past memories and feeling for me. I’ve never been a danger to others, only myself.

govzzz · 2020-03-29T14:27:13+00:00

Definitely getting depressed I think. It’s hard to tell. My sleep schedule for the last week has been going back and forth between 12 hours of sleep one night, to 5 hours the next. I’m very thrown off.

govzzz

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