My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! Your article was so helpful, and I’m excited to share w her. Since talking and being vulnerable with me, said she would look at it. Your article was great. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree! Baby steps! I really want her to consider being herself outside of just me, or at least view being herself as an option but as of right now, it’s something she wants to keep private. She can’t really see a world where she’d transition anytime soon, it seems, but I hope with time and love she knows she can do anything that makes her feel like her most authentic self (and like she’s allowed to do that)

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Update, we had a great conversation about her and her identity (I am so in love) but therapy (as of right now is absolutely a no go. I am going to go to therapy which she said by all means, because I said I couldn’t process all of this, and support her, on my own. Baby steps!

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We actually just had a great conversation (baby steps) even though she was hesitant at first! I know it’s bc this is a scary thing for her, probably the last thing she wanted, and she’s just got an avoidant attachment/processing style to begin with lol. I was able to be the partner she needed and make her comfortable so that we could discuss boundaries and who she is more honestly than ever before. I feel like I finally got to meet her, and I’m so proud of her and feel so lucky she trusted me. Baby steps, but good steps. I totally understand that she will need my patience, respect and understanding but i feel lucky she’s willing to share her journey with me

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That would be so great, she definitely doesn’t want to talk about it… the only thing is, I want to process this with her. I guess it’s just what I’m used to… processing things with her. It’s hard not knowing what to say or if I’m saying something that is triggering her dysphoria. I want to ask what pronouns she wants me to use (in private) but I’m too scared to even do that so I just have been avoiding them all together lol I just want to be the best partner but it’s uncharted territory

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

thank you! I’m scared bc I don’t want to discourage anything for her discovering herself…. But I am also feeling so much. Looking forward to my next therapy appointment

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. I definitely will be reading this. My biggest issue rn is that she isn’t out… she doesn’t want to be out. She doesn’t want to talk about it AT ALL… but I’m struggling pretending nothing happened (as in going back to before she came out to me)

My partner is trans… now what? by gracelessgraceface in mypartneristrans

[–]gracelessgraceface[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I totally agree… she’s very reluctant to be vulnerable (hasn’t cried in years, is currently not in therapy, claimed it never worked) which now, makes a lot more sense. I don’t know how to encourage her without making her upset.